Other LDRs?

[ClipitsWings]

I'm sure just about everyone here has been frustrated by CD couples and jealousy and that whole lovely array of feelings in rediscovering what you don't have. So, ever felt that envy for another LDR?

here's the thing for me, I've had my guy in my life for about 3 years now but we're not officially anything. My best friend is dating a guy a hellavu lot closer, known him for a few months, they plan on their firstmeeting way sooner than I and my guy can, have fluffy messages all over facebook all the time... ahey call eachother ALL THE TIME and..they're just... More... Involved? Don't get me wrong, I wish the best for them. I was over her house today while she was doing some quick paperwork, and the whole time they're on webcam (which is great for her, go them for being comfortable on it) and every 4-8 minutes they'd be going "I love youuu" "I loooove you too" hearts and flowers and happy manslaughter.
I don't get to cam/call often (mostly because we text while hes getting ready to go/is at uni and I'm uncomfortable being on camera/am going to bed). I get to talk to him everyday but whatever media we're using at the time XD and I just get stupidly flustered over not being able to call my "relationship" a relationship. Feels like she should be on LFAD instead of me >.> but I'm just being stupid (I'll deal with it in November or next year :l until then I'll wonder if I should even be posting here. Ohwell.)

Anywho! What do you think? Just ridiculousness or have you ever felt that way about another LDR couple?

[Mara]

Sometimes I'm jealous of LDR couples who have more visits than I do or get to cam more often than we do, but eh, I just squish it with the fact that every relationship is different, unique, and I know the feelings we have for each other. But we all for jealous. It's totally normal.

[Minerva]

My SO and I are TOTALLY that couple, heh.

Other than that, yeah, I do envy other LDRs sometimes. We have the triple complications of distance, different countries, and children. It's a lot to overcome. I envy people who are in the same country, or who don't have kids. Don't get me wrong, I'm not wishing our kids away, and I love his country... I just wish complications weren't so... complicated.

It's got to be hard for you to not even have a definition for what you have. Once you meet things will clear up. In the meantime, you are in a long distance relationship, even if that relationship is yet to be defined, so of course you belong here. =)

[Lissy]

I do feel envious of other LDR couples who live closer to each other than my SO and I do, but I know that having a shorter distance doesn't necessarily mean seeing each other more often. I can usually shake it off. And there's always that little tweak when someone has a visit coming up of "I want a visit, too!" but I know my turn will come eventually and I'm able to feel happy for the lucky person who gets to see their SO soon.

Honestly, I'm pretty lucky in regards to the convenience of my LDR situation so I don't have too much to be jealous of. But I think a little envy of other couples, LD or CD, is totally normal.

[lonelyinlove]

I understand completely. During my LDR, there have so many CD relationships in my presence and they are all lovely-dovely. It makes me so jealous. Then my sister always complains how she doesn't really see her bf since they stop working together. They see each other at least three times every week! It makes me so mad. I'm like really? Your complaining about a few days. She response to me that I'm (me) used to being apart. This is something you never get used to!

[Snap]

I'm one of those people who are fortunate enough to have their SO live not very far. We're only 200 mi apart, but in my previous LDR with my ex, we were 2000 miles apart, so I've experienced both sides. Despite the fact that my SO lives within driving distance, we still don't see each other as often as one would think. What prevents us from seeing each other is our busy schedules, not only the distance. Even when we were CD, I still didn't get to see him often. I honestly miss my current SO more during this LDR compared to how I felt when I was dating my ex who was 10 times the distance. So as someone said, don't assume that shorter distances equal more visits. Distance is distance

[Sora1101]

I tend to get jealous of other LDR couples too when I'm having a bad week or something, the ones that can see each other all the time and the ones that can actually go around announcing to the world that they are together. I can't do that and I only get to see my SO once a year. It's not that I don't want the best for these couples it's just, I feel like they take it for granted? Sure they're LD too but when you see your SO every month they don't know what it's like going a year or more. Sometimes I just wanna be like "you see each other like twice a month or more and you're complaining? Suck it up." Of course once I return to having a good week I can totally see how wrong I am but, at least I'm being honest with myself when I say I get jealous.

[HollzHeartsChris]

I understand the idea of LDR envy, but to be honest, the only thing I get jealous about is CD couples. I do sometimes feel a little envious of those in an LDR where they aren't so far apart (my SO and I are 5100 miles apart, and it does suck) but it's pretty much a fleeting thought that doesn't stay around for long

[kireinamida]

I've been envious of other LD couples as well. Usually, it's because of they are having countdowns for visits, or the other is actually visiting his/her SO. I'm happy for them, but I just wish we could have that too.

[bluishskin]

I wish the distance between us was a lot closer. I wish we could see each other more often than just once a year. I wish travelling expenses were cheaper. Those statements definitely emphasise my jealousy that I sometimes feel towards other couples. Maybe there are other "I wish..."-es.
Despite the jealousy, I try to enjoy every second I spend with my SO, even if it's just online and on the phone. I'm so thankful that both of us have managed to go this far. Some people are luckier than us, some others are not as lucky as us. It's just a part of life. So, no matter how sucky things could be, might as well enjoy everything while we can and always do the best!

[kteire]

Honestly, I haven't really felt jealous of other LD couples. The only other ones I've known have broken up, or have had their own set of challenges. My sister and her SO now live a 2 hour drive from each other, and they will likely see each other less than when she was living in Nova Scotia, about 800 miles apart. Plus, they've been LD for 4 years, and likely will be until my sister applies for and finishes law school. And they're super lovey-dovey and constantly telling each other they love each other... I dunno, my SO and I are much less affectionate that way, and I prefer that. I love him, but I only really like to say it when I feel it particularly more
I'm very happy with the way my SO and I are, even though I'd love to get to see him more. It gives me an excuse to go to Ireland more, and he's thrilled to get to come to Canada! And when I move to be an hour plane ride away from him soon, I'll be happy when we get to see each other more than every 3-4 months!

[heylittlekrissy]

Every once and awhile, when I'm having a down day, little things about other LDR couples can get to me, like being closer, being able to close the distance sooner, etc etc. It happens. But when I get my head on straight and start thinking again (damn those moments of weakness lol), I realize that while my situation is far from ideal, I'm happy having my SO, and would rather take on the individual challenges that we might/do have to face than not have him at all.
But don't feel bad, I think a good number of us feel like that at times. You DO belong here though! An LDR is an LDR, no matter what shape, size, or situation it is or it presents; each relationship is different. And don't feel bad about not getting to see your SO for quite awhile, my SO and I are official, but we won't be able to meet for the first time until probaly summer of 2012, so I know how it feels having to wait what seems like forever :/ If you ever need someone to chat with though, feel free to message me

[Malaga]

My friend was also in a LDR since November last year. Thing is, the distance between her and her guy is much greater than ours (5 time zones as opposed to 1) so they didn't get to meet in person until she travelled there a couple of days ago. During that time my boyfriend and I had several visits and she envied our situation and the fact it's not such a big deal for us to organize visits every couple of months.

Thing is, their first meeting went great, they're very much in love and she plans a permanent move there - she'll only be going back home to sort things out. She's going to be there now for 6 weeks, which is more than I ever had with my boyfriend - our longest visit was 12 days and it's probably the longest we'll ever have until we close the distance. We won't be able to close the distance for at least another 2 years, whereas if everything goes as planned, they might be settled by spring next year.

So yeah, she had it harder in the beginning, and I'm happy for her, but I can't help but envy her situation a bit. Even if I know that we're not ready yet.

[blferguson1s]

My reason for jealousy of other LDR's is when people complain that they are only visiting for 6 weeks or so. The longest I've spent with my SO since we went LD is just shy of 4 days. I would do just about anything to be able to spend weeks with him.

[13000km]

We're one of those couples who are on skype almost all the time if we could. My friends would come over and expect to see his face on my computer even if we weren't having a conversation right then. But I have been envious of the couples who get weekend visits and such. Then I remind myself that some of my friends are in CD relationships and see their boyfriends once a month. Every relationship has it's own way of working, I guess.