Other LDRs?

[kiara_silver]

Im just envious of couples who are closer. If we lived live closer we could see eachother more. Or those who get to visit there so every month or two.

[leonsfangirl]

I'm jealous of my (wait for it...) Ex-husbands LDR....

He met his girlfriend while visiting family in Glasgow which is just under 300 miles away. He can see her whenever he wants, doesnt have the whole visa thing to deal with, all "our" friends love her and so do the kids.
I'm not afraid to say that i'm jealous of some of you here too, being able to cam with your SO and how often you can see them and the ones with solid plans to close the distance and the ones who already have. It's human nature to be jealous, we all feel it to varying degrees it's just how we deal with it.

[Dziubka]

I don't know if jealous is the right word...
But my boyfriend's best mate and his girlfriend, who were LDR (800km) for a year and a bit are closing the distance in October. And to be honest, I find it very hard to be happy for them. I don't know if it's simply because I don't like her much or rather because I feel like "damn, we've been dating for longer, we should be closing the distance not them".
Yes, we do see each other a lot more than other ldr couples and I'm very glad about that. But at the same time, it's not something that just happens to us. It takes a lot of hard work, sacrifices and determination to be able to see each other that much. And it is something I need. When I moved away I stayed in the relationship on the condition that we see each other at least once a month. I'm absolutely not cut out for long distance relationships. I'd rather share a tiny flat with my boyfriend and be together 24/7 than have a lot of personal space but see him less. It's just the way I am.

Sometimes it really depresses me, that even though we have no vise issues to speak of and the distance is comperably small, it will take us 5 years to close the distance. We must be doing something wrong

[blankita719]

I'm jealous of one other LD couple. They were both friends of mine from high school and last year, they ended up together. He is here in FL and she is in NY. And they got engaged a few months back and will be closing the distance in less than 2 weeks. But he is a cheater. So I get jealous of them because I feel like he doesn't deserve to have it all come together when my SO & I are still struggling to figure out the end plan.
And I get a teensy bit of a cringe when I see people here closing the distance. Not directed at anyone personally - just that "when will it be my turn????" stress
I don't really get jealous of of CDR's because I feel like what I have long distance is stronger than a lot of close couples I know. I get upset over the distance like everyone else, but I don't envy others. It just makes me miss him more.

[kat4301]

I was pretty jealous of a friend's neighbor whose military fiance just returned after deployment. They have a situation where neither of them need to work much so when he got home, they got a lot of time together and went on vacations and such. Sometimes I wish I could just drop everything when my SO comes to visit but its not feasible for me. But I think that at the same time, this other couple clearly went through struggles that I don't have to go through seeing as my SO and I are not LD due to the service. For me I get much more upset dealing with CDR people around me, especially if its a couple whose have never been through an LDR.

[ClipitsWings]

...It's got to be hard for you to not even have a definition for what you have. Once you meet things will clear up. In the meantime, you are in a long distance relationship, even if that relationship is yet to be defined, so of course you belong here. =)

...But don't feel bad, I think a good number of us feel like that at times. You DO belong here though! An LDR is an LDR, no matter what shape, size, or situation it is or it presents; each relationship is different. And don't feel bad about not getting to see your SO for quite awhile, my SO and I are official, but we won't be able to meet for the first time until probaly summer of 2012, so I know how it feels having to wait what seems like forever :/ If you ever need someone to chat with though, feel free to message me

thank you both. i think i really needed to hear this

I tend to get jealous of other LDR couples too when I'm having a bad week or something, the ones that can see each other all the time and the ones that can actually go around announcing to the world that they are together. I can't do that and I only get to see my SO once a year. It's not that I don't want the best for these couples it's just, I feel like they take it for granted? Sure they're LD too but when you see your SO every month they don't know what it's like going a year or more. Sometimes I just wanna be like "you see each other like twice a month or more and you're complaining? Suck it up." Of course once I return to having a good week I can totally see how wrong I am but, at least I'm being honest with myself when I say I get jealous.

Basically described my thoughts exactly

So, everyone thank you all for sharing about this, and even more for being overall positive. Really though, the positive, thoughtful attitude here is so refreshing after spending so much time in my own head. i wish the best for all of you even though i'm a bit envious of a helluva lot of you. i dont think i have to tell anyone in an LDR not to take their relationship for granted, considering, but really, love what you have, because, as you can probably see here on LFAD, you're lucky to have them, and you've got it better off than you probably could, despite the complications.

[Miramaid]

I feel jealous of LDR couples who actually close the distance and those who get married. Because i know it is not going to happen to me

[LovingHim]

I get jealous of CD couples, really jealous. Of LD ones not so much, although I do envy a bit those couples who know when they are going to end the distance. I have another 3 years of uni ahead of me, one of which is abroad (we both live in England right now), and even after these 3 years it's uncertain. I'm not English and this weather isn't for me. I miss having sunny summers, when it's hotter outside than in your house, when you can have a water fight with your friends at night and still feel hot and winters with snow, skiing, mulled wine and christmas carols playing on a main street...

[Caitlin2009]

your not alone, i do get jelous of people who are in LDR but can see each other every weekend or every month, and can close the distance alot easier then i can as well. i just think me and most of us here are in this position because were meant to be, and however often we see our SO's or when we'll close the distance we'll do it when its the right time

[BoogleBee]

I do get jealous sometimes. I try not to but it happens. Mainly about those who live closer and can see each other like once a month or once every couple of months even. I would love to be able to see my SO every couple of months. But I guess that's what comes with a 11,500mile distance separating us.

However when that happens I try to think about the fact that those who do see each other that often might only be able to see each other for a few days or maybe a week. Whereas since we live so far, our visits are normally about 6 weeks long. So therefore...if another couple meets once every 2 months for a week then us having 10 months between visits but for 6 weeks is about the same amount of time together.

I try not to get jealous but it does happen, normally when I am feeling really low.

[Malaga]

I feel jealous of LDR couples who actually close the distance and those who get married. Because i know it is not going to happen to me

Oh no, what makes you think that?
*hug*

[LeilaniJoi]

It really doesn't matter if LDRs see each other once a month or once a year, the pain when the distance is there is still the same. I actually think it might be easier for those that are at a farther distance and know they won't be able to be together for months yet, than it is for those that are closer by and are agonizing over just how close (yet so far away) they really are.

We were extremely lucky with ours, and I realize this. I definitely would not flaunt it to anyone because I know the pain that comes with it, but we closed our distance very quickly due to me checking on apartments here when I was considering moving, and being offered a job out of the blue. What was going to be months turned into a 2 week notice at my other job and a quick packing job. For us, it was just another indicator that we were meant to be... everything has just clicked into place for the move, apartments, houses, bills... everything. When we were LDR however, it was so much of a taunt just because he was far enough away that we couldn't make it just a weekend visit easily, yet close enough we were in the same time zone and could drive the distance in about 13 hours.

I know it's hard to hear stories of ones that have closed the distance, but understand too that brings its own share of dilemmas and stress. It's a huge adjustment for anyone moving to be with their SO and sometimes I miss the easy way we used to talk and flirt and just hang out online. I wouldn't give up CD for the world to go back to that, but it's a whole different set of worries and stressors. All you can do really when you are LDR is take one day at a time, stay busy and don't forget to take some time for yourself too. In the end, if you are meant to be then you will be. If not, then chalk it up to experience and move on. For the here and now though, cherish the time you do get to spend together and don't make excuses for bad behavior by blaming it on the LDR. If they will treat you badly LD then they will treat you badly CD as well.

[Biddlybiddlybombop]

There are a lot of kinds of relationships I get jealous about. Well...not exactly jealous, more daydreamy and wistful, but still with the little angry ache too.
Of course I'm jealous of people who get to see their SOs more regularly. Or live closer. If something terrible happened to your SO, someone close to them dies, they have a car crash, (which, hopefully they don't, touch wood) and you're an hour's drive away, you can be there. Whereas if you're a plane trip away, it's a little bit more complicated.
I'm jealous of people who have SOs who are in very different countries, because they must have such amazing experiences, not only do they get to be with someone they love, but they get to broaden their horizons and visit somewhere they may never have been before.
I'm even slightly jealous of LDRs who haven't had their first visit yet, because mine was so magical and exciting that sometimes I'd like to relive it, and to still have that all ahead of you...It's a bit like a fairy tale acutally. You get to have a first kiss with someone who you already like and maybe love enough to make the big scary jump of actually going to go see.
And I know I'm lucky in my relationship. We're 10,000 miles apart, but I feel secure. We're a team, and we love each other, and we'll make it work, because that's what we both want. And I have faith in that. So, I don't get to talk to him every day, and I don't get to see him very often. But he's my best friend, and he's who I want to be with. There are millions of people who are single, or unhappily married, or don't feel like they're with the right person... And I might miss my SO, but at least I have him, right?