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A Rough Weekend...

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    #1

    A Rough Weekend...

    Please bear with me, I'm going to try and condense this as much as possible.

    This weekend started off a little rough because Brennen was finally moving into his apartment near his college. To add onto that, I had a pretty bad experience Saturday night when a friend of mine got so sick from drinking, I thought I was going to have to call an ambulance. It got pretty stressful, and when my friend called her LDR BF to talk, I thought I'd follow suit.
    I finally got a response the night after, only to have the convo cut short because he was headed off to a party.
    Today we finally talked a little about what had happened (I have a fear of drinking because in 8th Grade a kid I knew nearly died because of it... right in front of me.) and so I was hoping he could talk to me about it a little (like he usually does).
    It got completely glazed over, and then I found out that the party he went to he brought a date. And now he's not talking again.

    Now, I know I'm prone to paranoia, but is there anyway I can talk to him about this without coming across that way? I'm honestly confused.
    Any help would be nice...
    Every long lost dream led me to where you are
    Others who broke my heart, they were like northern stars
    Pointing me on my way into your loving arms
    This much I know is true...
    That God blessed the broken road that led me straight to you

    |First Met: 02/28/14|Exchanged Numbers: 03/07/14|First Date: 03/14/14|First Kiss: 03/21/14 |Became a couple: 04/05/14|
    Tags: confusion, drinking, paranoia, party, rough patch
    #2
    Communication is key to any relationship. I believe you should tell him that you would like a few minutes to talk on the phone in the evening and just talk about your concerns. If you have been together for a long time you should not have to worry about it. Tell him that you appreciate him hearing you out and ask him if he has anything to say. Don't forget to bring love into it!Good luck

    Comment

      #3
      i would not be ok with my BF bringing someone to a party (unless it is his good friend that I also know). Otherwise I would be devastated. Just saying. Doesn't mean i am right

      Comment

        #4
        Originally posted by ricecakes244 View Post
        Communication is key to any relationship. I believe you should tell him that you would like a few minutes to talk on the phone in the evening and just talk about your concerns. If you have been together for a long time you should not have to worry about it. Tell him that you appreciate him hearing you out and ask him if he has anything to say. Don't forget to bring love into it!Good luck
        I couldn't agree more. Communication is key and he shouldn't have a problem giving a few minutes to voice your concerns.

        Comment

          #5
          mmm when he moved how the relationship was? How you knew he went to the party with a date? How he decided not to talk to you anymore. We need more info...

          Comment

            #6
            The relationship was AMAZING until this weekend, hence why I'm so thrown off.

            We went from texting whenever we could, to a few from him incredibly late at night for me (12 am-2am) and none at all during the day
            I finally got a hold of him last night and brought up what had happened to me, and then he told me who his night went as well. Neither of us drink, so he told me he had a lot of work to do too. He mentioned in one line "Yeah, me and my date had to help this one girl get to the backseat of her car home"
            To which I responded
            "Wait... date??"

            That's when I posted this, because he stopped responding, I freaked out! Finally he responded way later saying "Oh yeah, it was my cousin's friend. We had to bring a date to the party, because it was part of the theme"
            It's a reason to bring one, and I know he wanted to go and meet kids at his school, but I'm still a little put off by the situation
            Every long lost dream led me to where you are
            Others who broke my heart, they were like northern stars
            Pointing me on my way into your loving arms
            This much I know is true...
            That God blessed the broken road that led me straight to you

            |First Met: 02/28/14|Exchanged Numbers: 03/07/14|First Date: 03/14/14|First Kiss: 03/21/14 |Became a couple: 04/05/14|

            Comment

              #7
              Yeah, I can get why you're still feeling put off by the situation... He really should have told you about it ahead of time. I agree with Miramaid, I'd be really upset unless he had taken a friend that I know as well. I can understand him wanting to meet new people, but if that involves him having to take a date to events, I think it's fair to ask him to discuss that with you ahead of time.


              Love will not betray you, dismay or enslave you, it will set you free
              █♥█
              Met: Cork, Ireland - December 31, 2009 • Started Dating: Cork, Ireland - May 22, 2010 • Became LD: July 15, 2010 • My Move From Canada to UK: October 26, 2011
              Closed the distance June 18, 2012!

              Comment

                #8
                I wouldn't like my SO taking someone on a date with him ANYWHERE. I'll admit, I can get quite jealous sometimes and to me this would be one step too far. Talk to your SO about it, and if there's a next time, if he has to do it, ask him to discuss it with you before he just goes off with a date without telling you. I'd be feeling immensely put off otherwise.

                Comment

                  #9
                  I would've been put off just because he referred to the person as a "date". I don't see anything wrong with him going with someone, but calling that person his "date" is a totally different matter. I'm glad the two of you talked about it somewhat, but maybe the two of you should talk a little bit more about how comfortable or uncomfortable you feel with him going other places with people he call his "date"?

                  Comment

                    #10
                    Which is weird, because I have discussed this with him in the past, and we agreed on just that. Mostly because I had a relationship in the past go sour for the same reason. Of course, unlike my Ex, I trust my SO...
                    Every long lost dream led me to where you are
                    Others who broke my heart, they were like northern stars
                    Pointing me on my way into your loving arms
                    This much I know is true...
                    That God blessed the broken road that led me straight to you

                    |First Met: 02/28/14|Exchanged Numbers: 03/07/14|First Date: 03/14/14|First Kiss: 03/21/14 |Became a couple: 04/05/14|

                    Comment

                      #11
                      Whether you trust him or not, you should still talk to him about it. Tell him what you've been telling us. Just that you were put off because it was the first time he'd mentioned having a date to a party and how you are feeling about it. I'd be really sour if my SO just sprung on me that he brought a date to a party without even mentioning it to me.
                      "We are all a little weird and life's a little weird, and when we find someone whose weirdness is compatible with ours, we join up with them and fall in mutual weirdness and call it love " ~ Theodore Seuss Geisel.

                      Comment

                        #12
                        Too many things...
                        1. Like everybody said, why he call her "my date", I go out with male friends but I never call them "my date"
                        2. Why he didn't tell you before about he is going with his cousin friend? It's like he was hiding it and like he mention the date by mistake he create an excuse about the theme of the party... Before I go out with one of my male friends I call my bf and tell him my plans. He is ok with that because he knows me and he knows them (I studied with these friends since I we were babys so are more like brothers). Then When I get back home I call my bf and tell him everything, he trust 100% in me but I tell all the details because I don't want never ever give him any reason to doubt.
                        3. The fact that he didn't talk to you anymore after you ask about the date shows me that he was not planing in telling you that he had a date and when he noticed his mistake he freaked out. Hours later he re-apear with an excuse, if that excuse was real he could just explained in the moment that you ask about the date instead avoiding you and tell you that much later.
                        As you can see for me this all is very suspicious, I know you want to trust him but he is not doing a lot to help your trust in him

                        Comment

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