I don't expect all that much from my SO... other than to actually talk to me during our monthly anniversary. Since he is in college I understand that we can't talk all the time but on our anniversary I expect a little bit more. Is that too much to ask? I hadn't heard from all day so I called him and asked what was up. He didn't answer, he ignored it right away and texts me saying I'M IN THE LIBRARY DON'T CALL. and he turns his phone off saying I'm a bother. How should I approach this?
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Well for me a month more is no that big of a deal, if it would be the year ok. And the anniversary is during the whole day, but he in that moment was studing (It annoy me when someone interrupt me while I'm studing). What I mean you didn't have to talk in exactly that moment, he can call you back latter -
Was he aware that you wanted to speak with him? I know with my SO we usually have to plan things ahead so we can avoid him having other plans with friends or doing school work. He could have been a little nicer about it regardless. I'm assuming he is in college though so you have to expect him to be busy and unfortunately when you're in college you're busy a lot.Comment
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did he have a big test or something? he might be under some pressure and was stressed out. unfortunately, if you have a big test or due date hanging over your head, talking on an anniversary may become much less of a priority...if that's the case, try not to take it so personally, even if he was rude about it...stress has the tendency to bring out the nasty in people...he's only human...Comment
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I'm gonna go ahead and say it: your SO was rude. I've been through college and am currently in law school, so I definitely understand what busy means... and it does NOT mean that you have a free pass to be rude and selfish.
Sending a text takes thirty seconds, if that. And if he really doesn't have that time at all, the phone should have already been off... if he doesn't want to be contacted in the library, he should have turned it off beforehand or put it on silent. It is NOT your fault for calling. If I were you, I'd tell him to look up "respect" while he's in with all those books and get back to you when he's figured out what it means.Comment
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Unfourtantly he did not have a big test beforehand and did know abut the Skype date way before he left for college. I agree on the fact of turning his phone off he could have gotten the message earlier. I still love him with all my heart. But I don't want to be rude. Sorry to all if i came off wrongComment
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wow...the spunk meter just broke! i like your attitude lolOriginally posted by agirl View PostComment
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nothing to apologize...you weren't rude at all...i think it's important in a relationship to first give the other person the benefit of doubt when they do something like that...he didn't have a test or due date (or at least, didn't let you know about it) and he knew that this was something to be expected of him because it's been routine...if he was going to be busy, he could have just sent you a message letting you know that...he shouldn't have snapped at you like it was your fault for not knowing what he's doing/where he is...you're not a mindreader and i'm sure you're not tracking him by GPS...Originally posted by ricecakes244 View Post
he definitely owes you an apology, but obviously you might need to be more open to canceled anniversary chats in the future...Comment
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Yes i do believe I should be more open in the future about things like this. It was just the first time out there and I wasn't highly used to itComment
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He shouldn't have spoken to you like that, regardless of whether he was working or not. He should have been much nicer about it and been more polite. It doesn't take much to be a little tactful sometimes and I can understand how it hurt when he said what he did. I mean, he's your SO right? He shouldn't talk to you like that. I agree with agirl, he was being rude and downright disrespectful. I understand how much a monthsary means to you, it means a lot to me as well
So he should make a little more effort, especially if you both planned a skype date. You shouldn't have to apologise for something HE did. I don't think it matters if you're busy with work, it only takes a moment to send a gentle, well-mannered reply of "I'm sorry but I'm really busy with work and I'm studying right now. I need to concentrate at the moment. I'll talk to you in a little bit, ok? " or something like that. You have every right to be upset, I would be too. And if he later regrets what he said, if he feels remorse about it which he should do, he'll apologise for it. He SHOULD apologise for speaking to you that way, cause no deserves that.
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