Well it's done

[Lannation]

I posted previously on how me and my SO were having troubles and she was having doubts about us.
This morning she needed some time to think if this LDR will work out. And well I just got off the phone with her and she broke up with me. She says that she still loves me and that she still wants me to be in her future.( I have given her a promise ring and we have talked seriously about eventually marrying each other )
She says that she cannot handle the distance that is between us and I know that the arguing has only made the distance harder. She says that she cant do this anymore. She is always worrying about me and everything.
We talked about and she just cant deal with this right now and that she wants me in her future and when she comes back from college on breaks she would like to hang out but just as friends. She still loves me and also wants to eventually be back with each other, and I want to be with her I love her so much and want no one else I wish I could describe how well we are together. She says she just cant do it right now. I know that she is highly overwhelmed with school right now which has probably contributed to her wanting to break up.

If she says that she still loves me and still wants me in her future but that it just isnt working out well right now. should I have hope that we will eventually get back together or just break that hope to nothing. I really need advice right now please

[rusty15]

I am so sorry
Maybe give her a week or 2, don't contact her, let her think about everything. Let her contact you and talk about what's going on. I'm sure she will come around. Is there anyway one of you can visit each other anytime soon, to talk about it in person?

[Miramaid]

I am on a break with my BF...I understand how you feel.
In my opinion when someone says "may be in a future we can be together again" (my SO said that to me too), it is just an excuse and a lame try to make it all not so bad. But that is jsut me. I am not saying it never happens, but compare to the cases when it actually does, chances are slim
I think you should move on. If you are able to stay friends, stay friends. But my counselor told me today, that trying to stay in touch with exes is a sign of avoidance and fears. That little children avoid the loss and do not want to experience loss, and that those adults who won't completely let go are either stuck somewhere deep inside in that stage (of being afraid to experience real loss and grief), or never actually had a deep feeling for that person.
Let yourself grief. So you are more ready for another relationship.
P.S. Sorry if I have upset you in any way

[LatinButterfly]

I went through the same situation last year... It was so so painful and even thought he decided to call it "a break to sort his mind"; after a week of feeling miserable, of crying non stop, not eating at all,etc., I decided to just focus on myself, of staying strong and preparing for the worst -a break up-.
I kept myself busy (going to the gym everyday, talking to friends and family, basically doing things I enjoy/like) and it eventually worked. With the weeks I started to feel better, was able to see things from different perspectives and got stronger... the love never faded away, that was not the plan anyways. =)

"The break to sort his mind" lasted a little over a month. We then got back together and things have been wonderful ever since then, with the normals ups and downs but still beautiful.
I am not a person who believes in breaks; but I am glad I gave him the time he needed back then because our relationship can not be any better now.
Give her the time she needs, if she really cares about you she will come back with an answer; just beware it could be a negative one.. Take this time apart to focus on yourself and try to see things from different sides; it will help you to clarify what you want, what you need and what have.
- A big Hug -

[Rugger]

Sweetie,, I wouldn't hold out waiting for her. I agree with Miramaid. "We can get back together in the future" is just a lame excuse so she can keep you in case she decides she doesn't want to be alone. You need to try and pick up the pieces and move on with your life. Find a new hobby you enjoy. Learn something new.

[Dauntedpoet]

Hugs for the pain your in. I agree with Rugger..."I want you in my future" is just her way of trying to make HERSELF feel less guilt about hurting you. Don't stop your life and wait for her. Take the time to grieve but try and find new things to do that interest you. I wouldn't talk or text or email her either... not contacting her will let her miss you and show her how much she's hurt you.

[HollzHeartsChris]

I'm sorry about what's happened. It makes sense what the other guys are saying, and I agree with them. It's probably best to just let this go, as painful as it is.