amazing and..wow..painful

[Nate]

okay the last 2 weeks were AMAZING...my SO was here, we did a lot of things took TONS of pictures and had simply an awesome time...
today i drove her back to the airport, watched her walking away through the gate and stood there until i couldn't see her anymore...it was one of the most painful things i've EVER done...watching her walking away from me...
the second i couldn't feel her in my arms or more like i knew that it is impossible now to wrap my arms arround her
neck though i STILL could see her almost ripped my heart out..

does this get easier in time? the more often you have your goodbyes? or gets it worse?

[NaNi]

My SO and I have been together for almost two years now and we had three visits so far. It doesn't get easier for us. At all. It still hurts terribly and we cry and cry and cry. Also because we can't visit as frequently as some couples. The next visit will be in 10 months. If we're lucky. It hurts letting her go - knowing that I won't be able to see or touch her for almost a year. It tears me apart.

[uniquefem]

no its not.. we both cry like baby on our good byes.... the second one he told me to be toughen up, and its not fair if i cry for him.. some how.

I know the feeling, its like someone pull your heart out of your chest, very painful and you hardly breathe to see your SO suddenly not there anymore and you know it will be very long time before you could see your SO again.

Its just sad

[Rugger]

I've been LDR for a year and a half. I still cry every single time one of us goes home.

[Moon]

No, it doesn't get easier

I have found that I bounce back from the post-visit blues a little faster as time goes on, and our visiting times are more routine.

[Dauntedpoet]

I've been saying goodbye to the man I love for 9 years. Honestly no it doesn't get easier.. BUT you do end up developing coping strategies that will help you get through it. Now I KNOW I'm gonna be a depressed wreck for 4 to 6 weeks (that's just me yours may be shorter or longer) and I know he's feeling the same, so we are both kind to ourselves and each other. We know we are both grumpy and we talk about it. So no it doesn't get easier but, you do learn how to deal with it.

[Sierra]

I keep hoping it'll get easier, but it hasn't for me. My boyfriend and I have been together for a little over 5 months and I think at this point we've had 5 visits. Every time he leaves I cry like a baby. This time I was able to keep it together until I got back in my car after dropping him off at the airport, but as soon as I drive away I lose it. Just thinking about it breaks my heart.

I stand there at the curb and watch him walk in, he always turns around and waves and then walks through the doors where I can see him anymore. I stand there for some reason hoping he'll come back but he never does. It's really hard to leave the one you love.

In a few weeks I'll be going to visit him and to be honest, I have no idea how I'll keep it together when I leave. I hate being long distance. And leaving him or being left is never easy.

[rsvpnj]

I am in a similar situation... I have been saying goodbye to my BF since 2002...so a little over 9 years now... we lived together for 3 months this summer and saying goodbye 3 weeks ago was the hardest thing I've ever had to do... which is saying a lot considering I am a single mom and am divorced. I honestly don't think that it gets easier with time unless you are seeing each other more frequently. I had LDR friends who saw each other every 3 weeks (don't we all wish). I just think that your coping mechanisms increase and your recovery time decreases. Good luck! You know we are all here for you!

I've been saying goodbye to the man I love for 9 years. Honestly no it doesn't get easier.. BUT you do end up developing coping strategies that will help you get through it. Now I KNOW I'm gonna be a depressed wreck for 4 to 6 weeks (that's just me yours may be shorter or longer) and I know he's feeling the same, so we are both kind to ourselves and each other. We know we are both grumpy and we talk about it. So no it doesn't get easier but, you do learn how to deal with it.

[Sierra]

I do want to add that I get to see my boyfriend quite frequently. About every 4 - 6 weeks. My recovery time after seeing him is about a week and a half. The hardest days are the first few after he's left. I've developed some ways to keep myself busy, and to basically just go to bed early and not think about it for awhile, but it does hurt.

I wish so much that it got easier with time but it's really the opposite for me, every time I see him I really just want to beg him to stay.

[GatoGirl]

No, it doesn't get easier

I have found that I bounce back from the post-visit blues a little faster as time goes on, and our visiting times are more routine.

Yup, my experiences exactly. After all these years, it doesn't get easier, but you learn how to cope with it a bit better. You find ways to help yourself stay busy and get back on track. But it never gets easier.

---------- Post added at 04:02 PM ---------- Previous post was at 03:59 PM ----------

It never gets easier, and after all these years, I no longer try to "keep it together" when we separate. Maybe because I've had more opportunities to know that I will recover I don't mind indulging in some blah days after we separate.

[Yaaamiii]

It never does for us...my SO is a lot stronger than I am emotionally...he doesn't cry like I do. But he does hold me when I cry and wipes my tears away. I know he's sad about it, he just doesn't express it.

[Madge]

When I leave Nick I feel that for me it gets harder and easier all at the same time. Easier, because it is one more visit done before we close the distance permanently. Harder because we get into the routine of being CD then we transition back into being LD again. It takes me about a 2 weeksish to stop moping about and look forward to the next visit.

I cry when I leave. My SO doesn't really but I can see it in his face how hard it is for him.

[Dziubka]

I don't know if it gets any easier, but it's different for me now.
In the beginning I didn't have as much trust in the relationship as I have now. It's not that I didn't trust him or me, I was just so scared that if we'd not see each other for x amount of time, we could grow apart or something. Now, after almost two years of visiting at least once a month, I've gained trust. There will be a next visit. There always has been. It's still painful and the longer we are dating, the more I feel that we're supposed to be together and the more I miss him during my every day life. But I know I (or he)'ll be back and we'll be together again soon enough.

When we became long distance after his first visit here, I cried for a few days. I couldn't even talk to him, because I'd break in tears. Everytime he sent me a text, it started all over again. It was so hard to do just about anything, because just about anything could make me break into tears.
That has gotten a lot better, but I still cry everytime we say good-bye (I guess there were like two times I didn't cry, when we would be apart only for a few days).

[Snap]

I don't know about all of you guys, but the last day of the visit is terrible. I don't care what we're doing that day; I can't fully enjoy it because deep down I keep thinking about the goodbye. Judging by the amount of tears after I say goodbye, I think it's getting harder for me. I always cry, but I've cried a lot more during the past 2 visits. I'm not sure why. Also, the day after the visit is always horrible.

So nope, it's not getting easier. Well, I guess the only thing that is getting better is that I'm becoming more adjusted to him not living 5 miles away from me anymore. I've found activities and other things to keep me occupied on the days when I don't visit. But overall, it's not getting easier.

[Engel]

I do want to add that I get to see my boyfriend quite frequently. About every 4 - 6 weeks. My recovery time after seeing him is about a week and a half. The hardest days are the first few after he's left. I've developed some ways to keep myself busy, and to basically just go to bed early and not think about it for awhile, but it does hurt.

I wish so much that it got easier with time but it's really the opposite for me, every time I see him I really just want to beg him to stay.

who said 4 to 6 weeks 'only'doesnt hurt? it freaking does.
i live with my so and had to spend 4 weeks now away from him, he will arrive sunday, spend 2 weeks with me and them 6 more weeks til i go back to germany. luckly this time we wont have anymore LD for good. our 3 years anniversary is in january and its when we plan to get married. so yes, we can have happy endings after all the tears for being away from who we love. we just need to believe and it will happen. <3