He won't give me his address?!

[Engel]

To be completely honest, I kinda don't believe you can be in a relationship during that getting to know you stage online. I believe that you can make a commitment to one another to be monogamous and not date other people until you meet, and that you can have a deep, meaningful, even loving interpersonal relationship with someone you've met online, BUT without meeting in person I don't really consider that a true romantic relationship.

I realize this is going to offend a million people, if not everyone here, but hear me out because I'm not invalidating anyone's feelings for each other, or anything like that, I see people with meaningful relationships (interpersonal) but there is no guarantee that in person, the feelings will be the same, or that anyone will even get along. And maybe I'm living on a different planet, but isn't that the eventual goal for everyone - to bring the relationship out of cyberspace and into the real world?

Exactly that. I would never consider myself in a relationship, and dont really consider other people in a relationship who never met in person, they can remain faithful to each other, but it isnt a relati0onship, not really.

[Engel]

I believe that true, romantic relationships can grow out of online "relationships" easily when the people have put in significant time getting to know one another, and when they are truly a good match for each other, but yet again, this is something that can't be known until meeting in person.
I don't expect everyone to do things the same way as I do, I do like people to be realistic about their online loves though because I believe if you aren't you may be set up for a complete heart break. Just like I said before to the OP, if she doesn't protect her heart, who will? I'm respectful of other people's relationships on this forum despite my own feelings and offer encouraging advice all the time, which I know you've seen. Like I said before, different strokes, different folks. People on this forum are involved in "relationships" that I would never call actual relationships, but I respect the way that they feel about their situation and their commitment to their significant other.

also that. someone that really agrees with me on that. a friend of mine met her so online, they are talking for ten months and never saw each other online, they will have their first visit in december and she is already talking about them getting engages on the one month they will see each other in person, i tried to put some sense into her mind about taking things slower and she got mad and defensive.

[LeilaniJoi]

also that. someone that really agrees with me on that. a friend of mine met her so online, they are talking for ten months and never saw each other online, they will have their first visit in december and she is already talking about them getting engages on the one month they will see each other in person, i tried to put some sense into her mind about taking things slower and she got mad and defensive.

That is exactly the scenario that stands out to me in alot of these situations. We have been living together for 5 months and aren't talking marriage... it just seems some people are rushing to be committed and in a long term relationship without really knowing the person they are committing to in reality.

I respect that people have different opinions of what constitutes a relationship... it's just an interesting discussion

[Kerry]

how long have you been together? I can see if it's been for a short period of time and he's a little leery. my bf didn't give me his address until I had made plans to come down to see him. to his defense I also didn't ask for it. but when I did he gave it to me.

[Tabbylee]

I agree with some aspects of what you are saying.. I do believe that if you've only known someone online for a month it is hard to call it a true relationship... In a true relationship two people should know and trust each other. There should be no qualms about sharing contact information. I disagree however with the thinking that people can't be in a relationship if they've never met in person. My SO and I have known each other and have been friends for three years now. We realized that we cared about each other as much more than friend back in April and have been in a committed relationship ever since. We talked everyday for hours on end via text, the phone and skype. Our feelings for each other were so strong that we knew when we met things could only get better. We had a foundation of friendship, great communication and mutual respect for each other where the physical connection/intimacy would only be a plus. We were in a relationship for 4 months before we met in person. I was head over heels for him then and I'm head over heels for him now Every situation and every relationship is different but I believe you fall in love with someone's personality, their beliefs, you love them for the person they are. You don't have to physically be with the person to learn and fall in love with those things.

[Alayna]

When my SO and I wanted to send things to one another in the mail we set some rules.

- When we send something in the mail we have to let one another know that we are sending something in the mail.

- Since im only 17 and we never met before, He felt it wouldnt be right of me to give him MY address. So instead I asked my boss for permission first and gave him the address of where I work so the package would be sent to my job and not my house. We dont want my mom to find out ( She knows about him but she doesnt want to accept it since im only 17 and hes 25.) He doesnt want to scare me away. And honestly if he were to ask me for my address I would say no because We HAVENT met in real life yet. I trust him and all but you can never ever be to careful.

- No sending really big packages.