How to handle the distance:

[SleeplessInSeattle]

It would be nice if I could get through a day wondering what he was doing, or if atleast he was missing me just as much as I miss him.
How should I handle missing him, and jealousy? I suppose both feelings aren't supposed to go with each other, they clash, and right now i'm clashing.

I understand that between the distance we're supposed to just go on and make friends who are of the same sex and different. But that doesn't take away from the fact that it is insanely difficult to comprehend the feeling of jealousy from afar. I just don't understand how to handle this.

Is it wrong to get annoyed if he so much as speak's to another girl in a some-what flirty way? I could be overreacting, I do talk to a lot of boys myself - nevertheless, I don't understand how i'm supposed to handle this.

Shame. That's how it feels right now, shameful. Not being able to discuss this with him breaks my heart, and the last place i'd want to go to is a website for
advice, but then again we're all experiencing similar circumstances.

Please can someone tell me what's the best way to just get past this mental block where everything I do makes me think of him, and then I get jealous because I might not be the only girl he thinks of. The main issue here is trust, and its mostly on my behalf.

I hope no-one else has to experience this, because I understand that's its mostly in your own mind. Sometimes it's not. x

[efish1042]

Yeah, it would be nice to get through a day without wondering, but at the same time... what would that say about your relationship? The fact that you are thinking about him shows you care. It would also be nice to have a CDR, but the fact that you're with this guy LD means, again, that you care. So stop with the wishing and get on with the planning and living.

Jealousy? He's gonna have female friends. If you were CD, you would have met them and you would likely be more comfortable, but as it is you have to trust him until he (hopefully never) proves you can't. Jealousy only shows an insecurity in you, in your relationship.

Okay "everything I do makes me think of him, and then I get jealous because I might not be the only girl he thinks of." ...Everything you do makes you think of him (obviously an overstatement, but yeah), but are you trying to tell me that you never think of other guys? What about a teacher? Some annoying boy in your class? Your brother? Some guy that tried hitting on you the other day? You think about them, but it's different (I hope).
The same is true for him and any girls he encounters. Until he gives you reason not to trust him, trust him.
It's okay to be jealous that they get to spend time with him when you don't, just like you may get jealous of couples you see around town being affectionate. You want it for yourself. But you're being jealous of the relationship between him and other girls... you don't want to be his friend, do you? So bear no one ill will.

As for getting over it? The same way you cope with anything else. The same way you deal with being apart. Distractions. Keep yourself too busy to think about it, until even when you're idle you don't think about it.

Best of luck!

[MoveAlong92]

I have felt that way before,
and like you said, not being able to discuss this with him, breaks your heart
BUT i think, its best if you could try to tell him how you feel

Whenever I felt like something is bothering my head that has something to do with our relationship ( example: jealous/missing him), no matter how ridiculous it may sound, no matter how shameful I felt, I would always tell my SO about it, and he usually give me reassurance that he wont do anything that could hurt my feelings or our relationship. And it makes me feel good hearing him said that.

So, you might wanna try tell him, share your feelings
If he's a good partner he'd listened to what you have to say, always.

[artgrl808]

I really have to agree with the above posts as well. I know it's hard to get past the fact that he's bound to talk to other girls in a somewhat 'flirty way', but that doesn't necessarily mean that he has the intention of making them feel like the way he wants to make you feel when he does it to you right? Ok, I apologize if the preceding sentence doesn't make sense, but it's the truth. The fact is simple: you're in a LDR with this boy. Boys tend to not want to be in LDRs due to the common fear of commitment. Also, if this boy is in a LDR with you doesn't that mean he's different from the rest? He trusts you, and all it takes is a little work on trust (on your part). Remember: he wouldn't make this commitment, an LDR commitment, if he didn't think you were (are) different from the rest. I know an online forum isn't always the way to go for some people, but then again why not? There are SO many people who go through these situations, and with experience comes wisdom. All in all you MUST talk to him. Jealously gets worse without communication. Tell him about your day and other important things...or just tell him about everything! That's how trust is built, and trust me when you reach the point in your relationship where you're able to trust each other NO MATTER the distance, it's a wonderful feeling. Best of luck!~