I WANT TO CRY :'(

[BennyLover]

Benny is off to college in the years to come maybe two he'll be a senior next year, all i know is he's looking for colleges, and it's scaring me. Trashy girls live on college campuses, he says he wont do anything wrong but he;s a dude and i know hes going to wanna party. Alcohol + Hot Chicks= One very mad black woman. What should i do?

[Gurl]

Trust him or let him go. That sounds harsh, but it is the only two options in a relationship of any distance. He won't change from faithful to cheating just because he's had some alcohol. Trust me when I say I know from experience that alcohol doesn't change who a person is in the majority of cases. Best of luck with coping with this new challenge. If you love each other and communicate well, you will be just fine.

[mllebamako]

What should you do? Nothing. You are stressing out about something that is a few years away. What's the point in getting all worked up about it now?
Plus, it's a pretty far stretch to say that "trashy girls live on college campuses". Like gurl said, alcohol or "trashy girls" isn't going to make someone cheat.

[floridaellen]

Honestly, nothing. You can choose to trust him or not. Nothing makes someone cheat - they either do or do not.

I dont think trashy girls live on college campuses.... but then again even though Im at college I dont live on campus so maybe there is a community of them and Im not aware :P

[Belle]

I lived on campus and I certainly wasn't trashy lol. There are trashy girls in the world so some will trickle over into college but thats not a reason to generalize us as a whole =P lol. And I completely agree with the posters above, no one goes from being faithful to being a cheater just because he has a few drinks or meets new people. You have to have trust in your relationship just like you always have and not worry about this stuff until you have to.

[Softy]

Don't worry about it too much, if your man loves you, even if he would be surrounded by 100 trashy girls...
He will stay faithful to you : )
You have to trust each other.
I know it's easier said than done, but keep strong and communicate with each other a lot and everythin will be ok : )

[lademoiselle]

I agree with everyone above me. Also, there's no point in fretting about a situation which may never arise! I remember when I applied to uni, and my SO (who is about five years ahead of me education-wise) started to worry a bit about the guys I'd meet. There was no need though, because of all the people I've come into contact with - and I'm in touch with quite a few by now - I wouldn't be with any of them but my SO

[ThePiedPiper]

There are "trashy girls" in high school, too. College seriously cannot be represented by an MTV sample on spring break. Yes, there are parties, but that does not mean everyone's trashy, everyone's good looking, or everyone's drunk and going to go looking for a hook-up. You actually rarely hear about a party that went south. Most people go to parties to socialise, have fun, and maybe dance a little, and hang with their friends, male and/or female. Your boyfriend entering college doesn't automatically mean he's going to become a chick magnet, and assuming he's self-confident and respects himself and his relationship, and therefore willing to stand up for his relationship, he's unlikely to attract anyone who would push those boundaries in the first place.

While the chance of cheating is, I suppose, always there, I suppose you have to realise that your partner is either the type to cheat or he isn't. There are no factors that make someone who wouldn't normally cheat, or who wouldn't have cheated at some point, cheat. If your SO cheats in college, he's likely to be someone who would have cheated at some point in your marriage for one reason or another, and you simply can't think like that. You're going to wear yourself and your relationship out, especially if you're thinking about something that's not even happening for a year or two and fixate on it! As others have said, your only two options are, really, to work through this, stop blaming trashy girls and alcohol (your SO is his own man and should be able to control where he puts his dick It's never the fault of anyone but the person who says "yes"), and trust him, or let him go, because if you don't let go, you'll likely wear down your relationship anyway. Have you expressed concern about this? Not "You're going to cheat on me with trashy girls while you're drunk, I know it," but letting him know that you've been feeling insecure about what happens when he goes away to college? You worry about him meeting someone and want to know what he plans to do with/for your relationship? Do you both plan to continue it and go long distance? etc. Sometimes expressing your feelings is a less angry/ranty manner, and not through forbidding him to go partying, can help you feel better and ease irrational concerns.

[MissButterfly]

You're engaged and have a promise ring right? At least that's what I remember. So if he makes such a symbolic promise to you all you can do is hope he's going to keep it and be faithful to you while he's in college. If he loves you, you don't have to worry about trashy girls, just make sure you're always honest to each other and are both committed to making it work. Communicating is and will always be the key to making such things work!

[Spriteling]

Every type of girl lives on a college campus, just like there will be chivalrous guys and those who are only out for a quick screw. You can either trust him, and believe him when he says he won't do anything, or you can destroy your relationship by accusing him of things baselessly. It's up to you really.

[rixue]

I agree with all of the above! You shouldn't worry about it right now since it is well over a year away. You should talk to your SO about your concerns. Since you are engaged you should trust he is going to keep that commitment to you while he is in college.

[ams.201220]

I really think you need to have a little trust. LDRs are already hard and the only way to keep them going is to have some trust, because you have no idea as to what they're doing where they are, so you're only choice is to trust him. He's in college, and if you get mad or clingy, he's only going to get mad and break up with you. If he said he won't do anything, just believe him and be supportive of his school and what he wants to pursue. You'll solidify your relationship that way.

[Kristin91]

As Gurl said you have to trust him. Without 100% faith in him you'll always be questioning his whereabouts and his actions, even when he's telling you the truth. Unless you can trust him with your entire being then it won't be worth it. You have to have some faith that your SO isn't such a terrible boyfriend that the first girl that comes up to him drunk is going to make him forget his entire relationship with you... Also, most college girls aren't that "trashy", at least not any more so than in the rest of the population.

You don't have to worry about this for a couple of years, as you mentioned, so for now don't worry about it. And if it worries you talk to him about your fears. Don't overreact to something that hasn't even happened and likely won't happen in the near future.

[artgrl808]

I know how you feel. I'm a Senior and my boyfriend just graduated last year. From what I can remember, I was nervous, yet optimistic about the future. Yes: college is a scary concept (especially if it means you'll have to be apart from your SO), but it doesn't mean you're relationship will end. I trusted my boyfriend when he said he'd be faithful, and so should you! It's been 3 months since he left for college, and we're still going strong. My advice to you (when the time comes) is to communicate with him. You don't know how important daily interaction is...it's very important. Also, don't overreact to silly things & hear things from him first (rather than going off of what his roommate or another 'friend' says). All in all, RELAX. You need to trust him (or like others have said) let him go. College is an obstacle, but it's only an obstacle if you make it one.

[Yaaamiii]

Whoooaa. Dang. Trashy was a bit far, wasn't it? lol I've lived on campus for 3 years and I am certainly not trashy. Nor are any of my friends. Or my SO's female friends. o.O There are trashy girls everywhere you go. In middle school, in high school, in college, and in the real world. :P

Just relax. I was afraid too because my SO and I graduated high school at the same time, therefore started college at the same time. He went out of state and I stayed at my community college for a year (living at home). I was afraid and nervous too. If he cheats, he was going to cheat eventually. If he's loyal to you, he never will. Trust is crucial to making a long distance relationship work.