New to this and very frightened.

[Bibliobibuli]

My boyfriend and I were together nearly 5 months before we moved to college and decided to split up because we didn't think the distance would work. Recently we were on winter break and realized we couldn't stand being apart. He asked if I wanted to give long distance a try and I do but i'm scared. Part of me still thinks it won't work and he'll forget about me. It is easier for him because I am at a woman's college so no temptation and I know that comforts him. I guess i'm just having the worries I'm bound to have but I still feel like I'm being silly. Any tips for a beginner or some encouragement, I could really use it right now.
Smiles!

[MattDavies86]

Being scared is never a reason to miss out on an opportunity that could leak to happiness! You've definitely come to the right place for encouragement, so many people here have been together for years and are thousands of miles apart! Plenty of happy endings too, if you flitter through the forum you'll damn near find anything your feeling, thinking or looking for!

Welcome by the way

[rach92g]

Welcome! LDRs are scary. My boyfriend and I had been together for 3 years when he moved across the country for college. Even though we had been together that long, I was still worried. During the months before his move we had to work on some issues, mainly with trust, and let me tell you something, trust isn't an art that can be perfected (at least not for me!). Sometimes I still worry, and we've been long distance for almost 3 years now. If I have any advice worth giving you it's this, communication and honesty are the most important qualities that make an LDR work. I know it's going to be hard, but try your best not to worry if he goes out with his friends or something, because you'll worry yourself to death and get all worked up for absolutely no reason.

Just as Matt said, you've come to the right place. I wish I had known about this site when my LDR began. I've made awesome friends that I can talk to about anything, and they are the only people that truly understand what I'm going through; none of my other friends are in LDRs so it's hard to talk to them about stuff, but this site makes it so much easier. It's a great support system. If you ever need anything I'm always a quick PM (private message) away! Good luck to you! You can do it, it's so worth it!

[rach92g]

Oh I just noticed this, our SOs both live in San Diego. Small world!

[Hyacinth]

Being scared is never a reason to miss out on an opportunity that could lead to happiness!

couldn't have said it any better! and if that's what you want to do, then don't let fear hold you back. as long as that's what both of you want and really mean it, then give it a genuine go and see how it goes! and try to keep up the communication even though you guys are apart. text messages, emails, skype, find whatever works best for the two of you

[Sora1101]

Once you think about it LDR's really aren't that scary. you'll talk to your SO every chance you can and it really becomes just like a normal relationship once you get used to it. All the things you worry about happening in an LDR can just as easily happen in a CD relationship, you just need to trust your partner and remember to communicate any problems you have with each other, don't be afraid of living your life either. Go out with friends, do school activities and whatever else you want. The great thing about LDR's is that you don't have to give up your life for your boyfriend.

[Bibliobibuli]

Thank you all so much. It is so awesome to have a community here with people who understand. I'm also lucky because my best friend and her boyfriend are also giving long distance a try and they are way farther away than me and mine. It will definitely be a big help to have her to talk to as well as all of you. I love seeing people who are happy it gives me hope!

[ST25]

Welcome to the forums! Indeed, this is the right place for some pieces of answers and just whenever you need to vent or gush about something in your LDR. It can get a bit difficult in the beginning, but after a while it isn't so bad. It gives you opportunity to miss him more and the moment you guys meet up again, it's more special and the connection can get stronger.

[Amelia]

oh i was the same i guess when the idea of going to universities comes up in relationships its inevitable that someone will move a bit too far away for the other persons liking but it happens...i think the most important thing is to remember communication and trust and you also need to try and avoid becomming extremely clingy and protective, initally it will be hard but eventually it will become like a routine... GOODLUCK

[Hyacinth]

Thank you all so much. It is so awesome to have a community here with people who understand. I'm also lucky because my best friend and her boyfriend are also giving long distance a try and they are way farther away than me and mine. It will definitely be a big help to have her to talk to as well as all of you. I love seeing people who are happy it gives me hope!

that's great you and your best friend can support and help each other out and you've also got the forums for support wishing you the best of luck in your LDR

[camlus]

LDR's can be scary, but you have to trust in the love you have for each other. No distance can tear true love apart! Have faith in yourself and have faith in the relationship you've already worked so hard to develop. Don't forget you have a sort of family here, we're all in the same boat so we really understand your fears/tears/smiles...etc.

[redapple]

I over thought the whole long distance relationship thing far too much before giving it a go. Like you I'm close distance to long distance. And having lived with my boyfriend for 6 months and being together 15ish I thought LD was going to be the hardest thing ever... But it's not. Honestly it's totally fine. Don't over stress it like I did, give it a go see how you feel. If it works then brilliant, if not then you'll at least know that it didn't. Good luck!

[ams.201220]

I'm not a relationship person at all, and this is my first committed relationship. I've had a few boyfriends, but they really weren't serious at all. I was also wary going into a serious relationship, especially since it was long distance after just one month of seeing each other. But he really made it comfortable and I'm seeing him after like 7 months for Valentine's Day! Really, just trust him. Trust is what will make or break your relationship. The minute you start doubting each other, you'll hit rock bottom. And definitely communicate with each other as much as you can!