This all is pretty new

[1304miles]

So my boyfriend and I starting dating 20 months ago (with a rough patch of off and on for about 6 months). My trust has recovered and we worked things out. We always came back to one another. Anyways, college came for him and he's now 1304 miles away as I finish my senior year here in our home town. Our LDR has been going on for almost a month and has been pretty good so far. Nothing to complain about, all casual talks through the day and Face Time through the week. My questions are: 1) any tips for new LDRs? 2) does it get easier with time? 3) would it be foolish to try and attend college by him?

Thanks for your support (:

[CanadianGirl]

Oohh, your first post. Welcome to LFAD My SO and I met while I was in my first year of college, but we started off online.

1) Lots of open communication. Try not to hold any grudges or keep insecurities to yourself or "save" the problem to discuss in person.

2) Yes and no. It got easier to handle being apart for months at a time, but the feeling right after a visit is always just as bad for me. It helps to know when you'll see each other again and start planning for it.

3) Only do it if it's what you want. It's a pretty significant decision, but to be honest, your choice of school for your first college degree isn't as important as people make it out. If you work hard anywhere, it will get you far. Not sure about expenses would be like for you (out-of-province/state tuition fees), so that's another thing to think about. I would say go to the college if you would go there regardless of this relationship.

Good luck!

[hanabana]

1) Try to keep things light and fun. That really helps the reality of the situation. Communication is key, as it is the main form of "being together" that you will have. And just remember that it will be hard on him too, not just yourself.
2) Does it get easier with time...for me, not really. My boyfriend and I have been together for about a year now, and it has been mostly long distance since the beginning. We visit each other about every 2 months, give or take a week or so, for about a week and every visit gets harder to say goodbye than the last. We get closer and closer each visit, but I believe that is in part because of the distance. My advice is to just take it day by day. If you're having a sad day about being long distance, allow yourself to feel that way, but try to slowly remind yourself how worth it it will be in the end, and make plans to see each other again.
3) Do you mean attend graduate school? If not, then my thoughts are to finish up your senior year where you are since it is your last year. You will have breaks to look forward too, especially Christmas break since it is roughly a month long. Plan your future for yourself. If you want to continue your school closer to where he is going, then you can. Just make sure you are in a solid relationship before doing so.

I hope I helped you out and didn't depress you too much. I was trying to give a realistic view on long distance relationships, because they are hard at times.

[alittlemind]

As others have said, communication is key. Seriously. If something is bothering you, tell him as soon as you can so you can work it out. It's not good to keep things bottled up, especially when he's far away. But this doesn't mean getting upset with him at every little thing either. But this applies to any relationship. Don't bug him about the really little things. That would just bring unneeded stress to you too, and college combined with a LDR is stressful enough.

As for if it gets easier with time, I really think it all depends on who you are. If you're both pretty independent people, at some point I think you'd get used to it at least. If you're more of a dependent person (I must admit, I can be) it might be a little more difficult. But as long as your relationship is strong, you communicate well, spend time with each other when needed, it won't be that bad.

Personally I am planning to continue going to college where my boyfriend lives. Hopefully this coming January, if not, sometime next summer. I made sure that I wasn't only doing this for him, but also for me. Make sure you think a lot about it, discuss it with your boyfriend, before making that decision.

Good luck and best wishes