Controlling parents...?

[Peanut_]

So my boyfriend and I met up over summer for a few weeks after ten months of working towards our final school exams. My boyfriend visited me and now I want to see him! I was hoping to see him at Christmas or New Years because due to our colleges different holidays it would be the only time when we would both be free. I have Easter holidays and summer holidays whereas he has February to March off and his summer holidays start slightly later than mine.

So as I was saying we had planned for New Years. But I tried asking my mum about it and she kept telling me to stop asking her. This was distressing my self and my SO because we would need to book the flight before they filled up. He told his mother and his mother wrote my family a letter inviting me over. My parents laughed it off saying "Not in this lifetime!". I can't even tell if they are being serious anymore. I'm totally clueless! This is causing a real strain on my relationship.

I love my family but sometimes they can be very annoying. He is my first boyfriend and the first boyfriend of the house so they are really constricting us with communication too. The wifi is turned off every night like clockwork, we hardly get to video chat due to the lake of privacy(everyone seems to become attracted to my room when Skype is on) and then telling me to suddenly stop talking to him for hours on the weekend! I really don't want my parents to hate my SO but somehow they just didn't like him before he even stepped foot in their house.

I need advice on how to approach my parents with the subject, I'm afraid that they are serious and will never let me go to him and disappointing my SO. Please help me!!

[cadams14]

Yeah, parents can be a bit obnoxious at times. It looks like they don't take your relationship with your SO seriously at all. My SO and I had a similar problem when we first got together. My mother really didn't respect our relationship and his parents didn't even think we would last. Now here we are three years later and I cant see myself being with anyone else. The only advice I can give you is that you have to tough it out. Show your parents that this isn't just some type of "puppy love" that will eventually go away. Show your parents that you really do care about him and that he really cares about you. Let them see that you are not giving up and over time they will began to respect your relationship. Also tell your SO what is going on. If he really loves you, he will understand and he will not be disappointed.

[Kristin91]

Instead of just asking to go visit, why don't you present them with an action plan of how you're going to make it happen? How you're going to pay for it, when you're going to book your flight for the best price, etc... This way they can see you're serious about going. Also, you could invite them to skype with him so they can meet him and realize that you're actually serious about each other.

[kittyo9]

Instead of just asking to go visit, why don't you present them with an action plan of how you're going to make it happen? How you're going to pay for it, when you're going to book your flight for the best price, etc... This way they can see you're serious about going. Also, you could invite them to skype with him so they can meet him and realize that you're actually serious about each other.

I like this advice... although really, parents can be pretty unpredictable. I was pretty sure my parents would never let me go see my SO until I just got fed up with it, booked a ticket, and went anyway (totally on my own). However, it's up to you to determine what the consequences of your actions might be if your parents don't like what you do.

[JET]

Instead of just asking to go visit, why don't you present them with an action plan of how you're going to make it happen? How you're going to pay for it, when you're going to book your flight for the best price, etc... This way they can see you're serious about going. Also, you could invite them to skype with him so they can meet him and realize that you're actually serious about each other.

I think this is the best plan. Could you arrange a sykpe 'meet' between your parents and his parents? So they can see they're not crazed serial killers (lol).