hopeless and confused

[Alieoop]

So, let's start from the beginning. My boyfriend and i have been together 2 and a half years. He lives in GA and i live in IN.
its about an 8 hour drive... I haven't seen him since the beginning of october and i wont see him again till the end of february. I'm starting college in January and i have three jobs and my life is all over the place, i feel like my life is heading in the right direction for the most part but i dont think that direction is getting me any closer to GA.. My boyfriend and i have always had this plan that i would move down there after college. but thats in two years, and assuming i can get a job where he lives. I just dont know if i can hang on that long. i mean our whole relationship has been long distance, we will be apart 4 and a half years before being together.. is all the stress and pain really worth it? Am i just holding on to a dream that will never happen? this whole thing is just starting to seem hopeless maybe i was just a stupid 15 year old girl thinking it would all work out.. am i ever going to make it to my SO? Is all of this commitment, love, stress, pain, longing.. just going to end in a break up? and all of it was for nothing? Does anyone else feel like this??

the next problem, i met some one that lives where i live, i dont know him very well, but i was automatically attracted to him.(i havent done anything wrong i promise, everything is completely plutonic) i cant help to think how much easier my life would be if i had a boyfriend that lived closer. The boyfriend i have now the one that lives in GA, he is perfect and sweet and never does any thing wrong. I honestly dont want anyone else. I dont want a different boyfriend i just want mine to live closer. and i guess that is my problem right there.. Im not attracted to this boy that i just met. just the idea of him being HERE for me.. for all the hugs i missed and the kisses and the movie nights and the school dances and the not being alone anymore..

i know i want to be with my boyfriend i just also know its going to be hard getting to that point. I just really hope its not a dead end street..

if anyone actually reads this,
thanks for listening to my problems.
always,
Alie

[lilcupcake]

i think what you're feeling is normal. although, i havent been in this game as long as you. i think it would only be a waste if you threw it away. then you could end up still alone, because after all that time with him, do you really know how to go about the dating game, flirting and learning a whole new persons ins and outs? and if you do, do you want to deal with all that crap again? you've come so far, and i know lonely sucks more than words can describe, but i think you should keep sticking with him.

[princessmaria]

What you're feeling is perfectly normal, and I think this new boy is what is triggering it. You're young and there's a lot more life for you to live. The immediate happiness of having someone there for you won't account for a lifetime with someone you love. I believe that if you truly love your SO the stress, pain, and longing is worth it in the end. Sometimes this isn't always the case though... If it comes to be that you are totally unhappy then I think that you should discuss it with your SO. You two could take a break, remain as friends, and see how that goes. Do what you feel in your heart is right. Do not cheat yourself, and do not cheat your SO. Be honest and kind to yourself; it's okay to feel certain things and want certain things. We're all human beings.

[Yaaamiii]

Yea, like the above posters said, it's normal. Find what helps you stay strong. Keeping busy should help, though there are the occasional times when even keeping busy doesn't seem to help. It sounds like you're not so much attracted to this other guy, but just the idea of being someone close distance. I'm sure we can all understand that. If you believe that your SO is the right guy for you, it will always be worth it in the end. The lonely nights, the tears, the arguements that seem to be rooted in the fact that you haven't seen each other in a while...it will all be worth it. If you fight for it and work really hard, you will make it to your SO. Be flexible.

I've been in a relationship with my SO since May of 2009 and we started college separetly in August of that year. With the exception of sophomore year, we've been LD ever since, and we're getting married next June . It is possible, and a few people on this forum have been in LDRs for many many years. Keep busy and find your strength again, we all have those weak moments!

[Alieoop]

Thanks everyone for your advice! You guys are so helpful.

[alli.efeelink]

Have you told your SO your feelings? What's his opinion on your long distance relationship?

[kylesocial94]

This is normal yes. Telling him how you feel is also an option! I feel your pain. I have had my SO close to me and now he is far away. Im terrified I will loose him to someone where he is going! Fear can be a downfall and fear can be a good thing. Use it to your advantage. Prove your fear wrong. Coomit to making it with him if you love him. Seems like u must! And if you ever need help. Dont be scared to shoot a private message my way ill gladly talk about anything you need help with