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    #1

    Advice please

    Hiya,

    This is my first time posting...

    I have been with my boyfriend for almost a year, known him for 2. We met in halls at University and hit it off really well. We finally told each other at the end of our first year and then began seeing one another. We are long distance over the holidays- the 4 month summer is our longest block. Last summer I flew over to visit him for a couple of weeks.

    I'm now feeling like we have a problem. We have just had 3 weeks apart for our Christmas break. In that time I have been really worrying about our relationship. We didn't seem to miss each other as much as we have before and if I am totally honest, where I have felt excited for him to come back at other times, now I just feel nervous. I am worrying about what will happen when Uni is over.

    After reading some of the posts on here I know to many people this is nothing at all, just hoping some one can give me some advice. Is it normal to get to feel like you are drifting apart a little when you're away (we have both just had really busy term's at Uni, he is doing his dissertation and I have been on a teaching placement). Any thoughts or advice would be much appreciated.

    Love N xx
    Tags: advice, college, confused, love, university
    #2
    It is probably just the honeymoon effect slowing down.
    I made love to him only twice, she thought and looked at the man laying asleep beside her. And yet still it is as if we have been together forever, as if he has always known my life, my soul, my body, my light, my pain
    - Paulo Coelho, "Eleven minutes"



    "Bız yüzyılın aşkı vardır" - We have dated since Sept. 2013. To see our full story, click here https://members.lovingfromadistance....and-our-visits

    Comment

      #3
      I agree with DC. It does sound like the honeymoon effect is wearing off. I don't think it's anything to worry about.
      "We are beings attracted to the essence of hope, and life is the all encompassing hope that everything can change; that everything can be better."

      Comment

        #4
        Some breaks are healthy. There's nothing wrong with having your own life separate from your SO and enjoying your time apart. Being nervous is also very normal. I would say that the concern comes in if these feelings continue after you two are together again, but for now don't worry about it!

        Comment

          #5
          sounds to me that it is all normal as well.

          what you need to make sure is that you are still in love with your BF, and you still want to make the LDR work, as if you do, everything else will fall into place as things adjust.

          Also Dissertations and teacher training are very stressful, so that is probably impacting things a little bit as well.

          Comment

            #6
            I don't think it's the honeymoon phase wearing off, it's the fear of the future and it's understandable. Being in college together is wonderful, but you just never know where your life is going to take you afterwards. You will have to talk about it, see what your plans are and see how you can include each other in them. LDRs take a lot of planning and compromising!

            Relationship began: 05/22/2012
            First Met: 03/21/2013 - 03/30/2013
            Second Visit: 06/06/2013 - 08/21/2013 ~ Proposal: 07/06/2013 ♥
            Third Visit: 10/09/2013 - 01/08/2013
            Closed the distance: 11/20/2014 ♥
            Married: 1/24/2015
            Became Resident: 9/14/2015

            Comment

              #7
              Ahh, don't sweat it. Like these guys above said, honeymoon phase cooling down and the next phase of your relationship starts. Just how it works

              Comment

                #8
                I think it just adjusting to the future and fear of it too, that is all this is

                Comment

                  #9
                  Maybe it's not so much the feeling of drifting apart, but more the feeling that you're getting used to this long distance thing.
                  Don't worry about it too much, that will only make you worry more because you're gonna overthink things too much.

                  Comment

                    #10
                    Thank you

                    Now that we are back together I am feeling really good about us <3 thank you xx

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