Dumped and confused

[skat]

My boyfriend and I met in college together and everything was great until he got offered a job in New York where I'm in Wisconsin. The job choice was inevitable and I initially had many doubts and hesitations since we had only been dating for a couple months when we got the news. But he assured me through his words and actions that he wanted nothing more than to be together and make the distance work because it's only temporary and we started to fantasize about what it'll be like when we're together after a couple years. Everything seemed fine, sure we've had our share of arguments and have had a lot of things to get through together but we always wanted to be together at the end of the day. He left August 29th for New york and he came to visit me for my birthday on Wednesday and proceeded to break up with me today, the 20th. I'm so confused because the entire time he spoke of his strong feelings and desires to be with me but that we would be too miserable away from each other for so long and "he doesn't want to do that to me" and that he's "looking out for my happiness."

I just don't get it because two weeks ago when I was having my doubts, he assured me everything was going to be good and now he wants to give up. Is this just the initial scare of moving away and I just need to keep assuring him or this something that I should lose hope over?
He kept telling me that he wants to be with me and how important I am to him and how much he loves me but doesn't want to be together?

[R&R]

It's hard to speak for him as we only have so much information. He's using the stereotypical typical reasons of looking out for your happiness & not wanting you to be miserable to try to make you feel better about him ending the relationship. Usually when those types of reasons are given it's because the person ending it either (1) is trying to lessen the pain for you or (2) just doesn't want to get into the real reasons behind it.

I would suggest at this point to believe what he is telling you and walk away with dignity. Don't beat yourself up with the "why's" and "what-if's". Don't be the clingy girl who won't let go or won't go away. Instead, focus on moving forward with your life.

[Redheart14]

It's hard to speak for him as we only have so much information. He's using the stereotypical typical reasons of looking out for your happiness & not wanting you to be miserable to try to make you feel better about him ending the relationship. Usually when those types of reasons are given it's because the person ending it either (1) is trying to lessen the pain for you or (2) just doesn't want to get into the real reasons behind it.

I would suggest at this point to believe what he is telling you and walk away with dignity. Don't beat yourself up with the "why's" and "what-if's". Don't be the clingy girl who won't let go or won't go away. Instead, focus on moving forward with your life.

I agree with this