Never officially met?

[EmiStarlight]

I have never in person met with my partner. However for once in my life I feel like it is a partnership. I'm affair to get too invested though, what if we can't make distance work - my last boyfriend couldn't...

[Honour]

If you both want this, then you'll BOTH make it work. An LDR is difficult enough without it being one sided. If he can't do it he can't be forced to do it. That said, if you both want to be with each other, go for it.

[MissingMyDutchLove]

I've learned that if you have to ask the question: what happens if I get too invested, you normally already are. If you're worried about getting hurt, that means that you are serious and want this. You don't have control over who you love...the hardest part is that they have to love you back. Unfortunately, you can't control that part. As Honour said, long distance is HARD. It's extremely hard for even those of us who have already met/ fell in love in person. But if you ask me, putting yourself out there is part of the beauty of love. Knowing that you might get hurt and still giving it your everything is something really special. I hope for your sake, that you allow yourself to be open enough to get hurt and that your SO feels the same way so that you don't have to.

[Unicorn26]

It took almost three years for me and my SO to meet in person. It wasn't for lack of trying, a lot of things got in the way.

I can totally relate to everything you've said. I felt the same and before our first meet I was so nervous that he wouldn't like me I made myself sick with worry as despite trying not to be, I was totally head over heels.


At times, I felt like I was losing my sanity not knowing if what we had was "real" and the long wait was so tough. You never really know until you meet someone in person but in my case it was totally worth the wait. I miss him soooooo badly, but we are stronger than ever and both very determined to make this work.

If you can, try and start to plan your first visit. See if you can arrange something reasonably soon. At least then you will know for sure whether it's a winner or not. You may have to have some difficult conversations but you need to know now before get in too deep. Long distance is hard. REALLY hard. But if, like me, you are lucky enough to find someone who's as committed to it as you are, it can be extremely rewarding.