Boyfriend broke up with me.. devastated

[alice12]

So my 14th month LDR ended the other night, he drove down to see me (was meant to stay for the weekend) and basically said he doesn't feel the same way he used to anymore - that he doesn't think of me as much when we are apart, and that he doesn't get that exciting feeling when he's going to see me again. He said he had this weird feeling of not getting excited three weeks ago when I last saw him and we talked it out and every thing seemed fine after. He said the feeling worsened after that and that he didn't want to lead me on by staying with me feeling this way, to then break up with me weeks/months later. I am so devastated and hurt by this, I loved him so much and he was my best friend too I honestly thought we had a future together.. I feel like I've lost 2 things at once. He was very upset himself breaking up with me and said he did want to stay friends/best friends as he still cares for me but I honestly don't know how we would. I doubt I'll see him again unless we arrange to meet up in Summer but who knows if we will even contact each other anytime soon. It feels horrible going through each day not talking to him as we have talked every day since we broke up. I just want to text and call him so much :'( I am avoiding going on any social media because I can't bear the thought of seeing what he is up to... I feel so empty inside and I don't know what to do with myself. I honestly don't want to lose him as a friend but if we don't talk for weeks/months it will have been too long to suddenly contact each other again but if we keep texting now it'll be harder for me to get over him and he might not be bothered about texting me. Seeing as he was the one who broke up with me I feel like I should wait for him to contact me, but if he doesn't I'll feel even worse.

Please anyone have any advice on how to go about staying in contact, and to help me feel better? I am fed up of crying

[Redheart14]

Sadly, there's no fix to this. He's made his decision and at least was honest and told you when he saw you. Staying off social media is good. Now you've got to work on yourself. Get yourself happy, your happiness shouldn't rely on your ex SO. Just take time to heal, catch up with friends and do things you haven't done but have wanted to do. Best of luck to you.

[differentcountries]

I am sorry this happened.

As for keeping in contact with an ex, the best if to have no or very limited contact the first months. One of the things that helped me get over my ex, was finding new hobbies. It shows to yourself that you can be a person with experience beyond that person.

As for social media, there is nothing wrong with putting him on hold where for a while, I mean not delete or block him but there should be a "hide" button so he doesn't turn up in your feed.

[R&R]

Sadly, there's no fix to this. He's made his decision and at least was honest and told you when he saw you. Staying off social media is good. Now you've got to work on yourself. Get yourself happy, your happiness shouldn't rely on your ex SO. Just take time to heal, catch up with friends and do things you haven't done but have wanted to do. Best of luck to you.

This is excellent advice. For now, I would remove him from your social media. There's nothing saying you can't add each other back at a later date if you both choose to do so.

Though it sucks right now, it will get better. I'm sure it was hard to hear but his honesty was the best thing. I'm sure it wasn't easy for him to say either. One day at a time for now.