thinking of cheating?

[emjay36]

Although August, it would be a wise choice to stop the flirting, because it's just chucking yourself into further temptation really.. I know it's hard though..

[Verojoon]

Ok about the flirting... it doesn't mean it will lead to anything... I used to flirt a lot... I still sometimes have a difficult time finding the line between not being rude and being too friendly! Anyways, it made my SO uncomfortable if I flirted and we talked about it... in the end he decided to accept it, and I decided to work on not doing it... (LOL if he had told me to absolutely stop, I probably wouldn't have... but that's the way I am)

But if someone flirts with me, I seem to not be able to deal with it... it seems if you are not rude then many men will take that as an advance on them... *sigh* If you flirt in a context where the person knows you absolutely do not mean it, it is safer... and it is good you do not do it behind his back. In the book The Zahir by Paulo Coelho, the man says he should have realized something was up when his wife stopped talking about the guy... I think when things are heading in a bad direction we may stop telling our SOs about it before even we realize why...

I am also someone who needs a lot of attention... my SO seems to have figured that out and even though he can't shower me physically with attention, he has been good enough about texting me, telling me he loves me, saying he misses me, and skyping me when he cans that I actually feel good about the attention I am getting... Really good. I am smiling just thinking about it...

Now if I need more attention still, I try to look for it elsewhere than in the flirting with men... I will seek it out in intellectual discussions and artistic expression... and probably by being very annoying on my Facebook account!

I think you are standing on a fine line but it doesn't mean you are in a bad place... just make sure you respect your SO and you are honest with him and I think you two should be just fine!

[Johndoe11]

I agree that you can say its not "flirting about sex" all you want, but it only takes either you or the guy/s to take it that little bit further, then a bit more and then you might do something you regret...then what?

I personally don't flirt or respond to flirts and expect the same from my SO. Yep its hard and lonely without the physical side, but why would I want the attention from anyone but the one I love? If I need that instant attention then I may as well end my LDR and be with anyone who'll have me. If I knew my SO was flirting, we'd be done with. I don't need to constantly worry that she's out there flirting with anyone who'll give her attention. My 2c

[Caitlin2009]

when i was in LDR it did pop into my head to do that, but it never lasted too long. i knew if i did that then i would ruin the best thing thats ever happen to me and i could never do that, plus nobody else would be able to satisfy me like she does

[Dziubka]

I'm not going to touch the cheating issue, enough has been said about that.
But people... calm down about the flirting.
I love flirting and I flirt and dance with other guys when I go out without my boyfriend (and when I go out with him, too sometimes). I'm not taking away anything from my boyfriend or devaluate our relationship by innocently flirting with someone else. Flirting doesn't mean chatting someone up or even exchanging numbers. There's nothing wrong with smiling at someone or making or getting a relatively innocent compliment. If we all did that more regularly the world would be a happier place.

[Verojoon]

If we all did that more regularly the world would be a happier place.

If we did that more often, me smiling or being friendly with a member of the opposite sex wouldn't put me in the awkward situations it does now! (Where I've somehow accidentally lead them on by not being rude or telling them F-off. )

[Hololz]

Here's how I generally tend to handle this whole flirting situation thing. If a guy starts being friendly with me, I will generally be friendly back and accept whatever compliments he's willing to give. (Now, I'm not sure what other people interpret as me being "flirty" and me just being friendly, so I cant comment as to whether I have "flirted" with other men. It may have been interpreted that way by men or other people but its not something I've actively tried to do). I usually slip the fact that I have a boyfriend into the conversation really early on for example, "Oh you like doing X, my BOYFRIEND enjoys that too". If the guy is decent he'll usually take that as a hint that I'm not interested in anything but talking to him and perhaps making a new friend. If he keeps pushing for more then I generally make some sort of excuse and leave.

[Alsfia]

I too flirt a little but I never take it that far that anyone gets hurt when I slip my SO into the conversation (which mostly happens when it gets too friendly), and usually we both have a good time. I know my SO doesn't mind, because we have talked about it. I don't do it often though, I'm not a very outgoing person, so I tend to flirt way more with my SO, which is way more fun actually But too much is too much, and you have to know your limits and do what's right to both you and your SO.

[Kristin91]

If you can't honor the fact that you're in a relationship then you shouldn't be in one. Simple as that. Don't debate over whether or not you should/could cheat on your boyfriend because it's not right in any situation. If you honestly feel like you can't have a LDR because you want the physical stuff so badly then get out of your LDR. Don't hurt your boyfriend because you're too immature to honor your relationship.

[demonwithin]

if you have thought's of cheating, then maybe it's time to let you boyfriend go, I've been with me SO for 7 months and we 2 years before that we hadn't been offical yet but were still only seeing eat other. Not once have i thought of cheating, it's not something LDR couples can afford to have. Your either in it for everything that person is an only them, or it'll break in time..

[Saleanah]

I noticed you and him had a US/England LDR. That's the same for me and my bf. I saw your distance closed.. that's awesome It inspired me, just wanted to let you know.