Waiting for visa

[PBubble]

Hi...I am new on here. I've been with my boyfriend for about a year, in that time taken two trips together and we meant to be together permanently by now. The issue I'm having is that his visa hasn't come through. It's difficult because there's no reasoning, just needs extra "administrative processing" before he can come be with me.

Has anyone else gone through this? This week it has been the hardest so far. Our anniversary is in one week, and since I don't have a time frame for when he'll be here I find myself feeling really hopeless and down. We both are feeling powerless, because we can't even check on the progress of the visa until the end of February.

I want to be strong for him but living on my own, in the house we were supposed to share is really hurting this week. Sorry for the downer post, I'm just not sure how to accept or be happy with how things are now, and was hoping I wasn't the only one going through it!

[Zephii]

G'day, welcome to the forums.

Visas are such a shit sometimes! Generally I think it safest to plan for the longest processing time they advertise. Like if it takes 6-9 months, plan for it to take 9. It saves disappointment. Try to focus on the fact it is lodged and that hurdle is over. You may not know exactly when this will be over but you know it is soon! So take that time you'd usually spend mopeing and go for a jog or pick up a hobby you can impress him with/ share with him when he does get there. Go out with your mates too because once he lands you two might stay in your couple-bubble for a couple of months

Believe it or not you are doing awesomely for an international couple! Two visits AND your closing-the-distance visa is lodged? That's awesome! Good on you.

Hopefully if nothing else the forum will be a nice distraction for a while.

[kittyo9]

Yeah, you guys are way ahead of the game. You're very lucky to have gotten so far in such a short amount of time.

Visas can take what seems like forever. A lot of the attention to immigrant visas has been shifted to other places in the past few years, slowing down the process. Have some patience-- have an LD anniversary date (I've had two and will have two more... whee) and get excited for the fact that you're on the home stretch. February is just around the corner! You can work on fixing up the place for your SO and saving up some funds for you two to do things together once he's there.

[demonwithin]

Oh deary <3 You should relax :3 its only a little more time apart, think positive!!! :3 he'll be there soon and you'll both be happy as hell, just tell your heart to wait a little longer :3 <3 <3

[MattDavies86]

Oh I feel your pain about visas, they're flat out tricky and sometimes they refuse them for the stupidest reasons! Then again I have a feeling my visa issues are completely unrelated to yours, chin up though, if you've waited this long you can hold out a little longer! maybe you can stay with your family or a friend for a couple of days i being alone is killing you?

[Hyacinth]

hi PBubble! welcome to the forum
i had to cancel my closing-the-distance visa application because unfortunately, the processing time was coinciding with my pregnancy due date these things can take a bloody long time and it really does suck.
my partner always says something along the lines of "we might not be together now, but once we are together permanently, we'll have forever!! (to make up for all the things we have missed when apart)"

so, hang in there and in the mean time, keep yourself busy with books (or whatever it is you enjoy doing in your free time :P) and if possible, spend lots of time with your friends too

[PBubble]

Thanks you guys for all your sweetness I've been reading a lot and it seems like I should just get used to the distance a little longer (MattDavies86 - the visa issues are because he has a Muslim name, from what I've read they'll do a pretty extensive background check before they let him in the US). Apparently it could take up to a year so I've been kind of doing my best to stop dwelling on it!

Hyacinth - my bf says the same thing about being together. He's infinitely more patient than me, I'm lucky for it too!

Zephii - so I took your advice and I started learning Urdu...his mom doesn't speak English and I figure it'll be nice to be able to communicate with my future mother in law it's been a nice little project & distraction so far!

[Saleanah]

Wait, I'm confused. Do I need a visa to visit England? (I live in USA)

[kittyo9]

Wait, I'm confused. Do I need a visa to visit England? (I live in USA)

https://www.ukba.homeoffice.gov.uk/v...u-need-a-visa/

[Hyacinth]

Thanks you guys for all your sweetness I've been reading a lot and it seems like I should just get used to the distance a little longer (MattDavies86 - the visa issues are because he has a Muslim name, from what I've read they'll do a pretty extensive background check before they let him in the US). Apparently it could take up to a year so I've been kind of doing my best to stop dwelling on it!

Hyacinth - my bf says the same thing about being together. He's infinitely more patient than me, I'm lucky for it too!

Zephii - so I took your advice and I started learning Urdu...his mom doesn't speak English and I figure it'll be nice to be able to communicate with my future mother in law it's been a nice little project & distraction so far!

i honestly don't know how mine turned out to be such a patient person as well. but yep, we're lucky. coz they counter our impatience and keep us from completely losing it! lol.

aww bless your heart, how long have you been learning Urdu now? are you going for lessons or teaching yourself?

[PBubble]

I just started last week - trying to teach myself. I figure after a little while I'll be able to surprise him with it and have him help me practice it's been really nice to have a kind of default thing to do if I get sad or whatnot

[Hyacinth]

I just started last week - trying to teach myself. I figure after a little while I'll be able to surprise him with it and have him help me practice it's been really nice to have a kind of default thing to do if I get sad or whatnot

that's really cool. well done i'm actually smiling, how thoughtful of you i'm about to send you a PM with a tiny suggestion *hugs*