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Young Marriage Jealousy

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    Young Marriage Jealousy

    I look at so many blogs a day and read people's replys. A lot of you I just want to say are so incredibly lucky. My SO and met June 14, 2010. We still have yet to met, I mean i'm fine with waiting. But I see people who have met later then even my SO and I and you guys are already living together/married/having a baby. It makes me want to met my boyfriend so bad. It inspires me in a way though to see you guys actually get through it. So I want to thank you. But I can not express how bad I want it. Some day it'll come, I just can't wait to see his real face, hear his real voice, touch his skin. Gosh I really love this website.
    By the way we haven't really gotten to meet yet because I'm 17, but 18 in 3 days. He's 19 and 20 in March. My passport still is in it's process (I'll hopefully be finally meeting him in March!!) Also, my parents wanted him to come first, but i wanted to go there first...
    Us: Saleana & Jason
    Location: S.C, USA & Newcastle, England
    Ages: 18 & 19
    Met Online: June 14, 2010
    His Feelings Started for me: June 14, 2010
    My Feelings Started for him: July 6, 2010
    First "I love you": January 17, 2012
    "Officially together": February 1, 2012
    Met First Time: HOPEFULLY March 14, 2013 (already booked the flight)
    Closing the distance: No Idea

    #2
    I know how you feel dear. My SO and I knew each other for two years before we got to meet and it felt like it would never come. This site is good and bad in that you are happy to see people making their LDRs work, but you get jealous of everyone getting to see their SOs quite often. My SO and I got married when he came to see me hoping that we would be able to close the distance and do the UK visa but due to college we aren't able to close the distance until next summer after I finish my degree. So we are married but we haven't seen each other in 18 months. Fortunately we get to see each other in 6 weeks!! Woohoo for that. When you all meet you will know that all that time you spent talking before you met never goes away, it still is a very important thing in your relationship. Fraser and I talk about funny times we had on Skype like 3 years ago just as much as the time we spent together. Just hang in there dearie, you all will be seeing each other before long!

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      #3
      Things come in time. I definitely know how you feel though, it's tough seeing people who have been LD for a couple of months and then they get to move in together. It's really important though to be happy for them instead of jealous or harboring any bad feelings though. Makes things a little bit better. Also, looking forward to things help time go by! I have a huge wedding board on pinterest that I tend to every time the distance gets me down. You'll get there!

      "Today is one day closer to being with the one you love" is a good quote that someone on here said once, it's always stuck with me and helped.

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        #4
        It's a good sign that you can be happy for people rather than letting the green monster get you

        You'll get there too. My SO and I took over four years to finally meet in person (and he didn't want to go offical and commit to me until we had) but when I finally got there, everything clicked into place and we closed the distance in under a year. Don't think that a slow start will set you back forever
        Happily married to the little Canadian boy I never thought I'd meet in person

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          #5
          Yeah I get that way too... I'm happy for people who get to see their SO more often or close the distance after only a year or two.. but also get jealous sometimes. I knew my SO for a little over a year before we met in person. We have had basically one visit a year, in varying lengths, and recently (a few months ago, around our last visit) have realized it'll still be a few more years before we can officially close the distance. This is because we realized we had to go back to university and get degrees in order to have the potential to get good jobs to be able to support our dreams and future together. I would have loved to close the distance by going to university in his country but we couldn't do it because it would be too expensive in our case.. but anyways, I've now had time to settle it in my mind. How I feel better about it is that I know where we want to be, and even now when we are long distance, we are unravelling our own precious love story, and I wouldn't change that for anything.

          Comment


            #6
            I get really jealous, too. ): It just doesn't seem fair that some people meet, can close the distance and get married in less time than it took for my SO and I to even meet for the first time. It makes me feel worse when people complain about not being able to see their SO for a few months when I know we will see each other less than once a year and we can't close the distance yet, even though we're ready to.

            While I was visiting my SO, we went out to lunch with his cousin and her husband, who had gotten married within the last year after a brief CD relationship. They were not hesitant to point out that my SO and I had been together for longer than it took them to meet and get married. While it's interesting, we just held each others' hands a little tighter, hoping we wouldn't be apart for much longer.

            I don't really have any good tips 'cause I've been having a bad time dealing with most of this stuff lately. Meeting and then closing the distance really quickly is fantastic, if you can do it... but I often feel like I can't relate to other people in their LDRs because we have such unique circumstances.

            So... I feel ya.
            Canadian permanent residence APPROVED!
            Closed the Distance: 09/26/2019
            Engaged: 09/26/2020

            Comment


              #7
              I envy a lot of people on here who see their SO every few months, who have closed the distance, who have gotten married, etc. I am truly happy for those who fall under those categories; however, when I take a step back and think about it, it makes me miss my SO a lot. It makes me long to close the distance and start our forever. Something that made it worse for me this past Christmas (2012) was that my SO's sister got engaged to her boyfriend. I was so happy for them, yet I was beyond green with envy and the little monster of jealousy was rising up. After squashing both feelings, I just thought to myself that in four or five more years, that will be us.
              I know it's a long way off, but I know in the end, the wait will have been more than worth it. Yes, we all get jealous at some point or another, but that's just human. We just have to keep ourselves busy with our studies or work and continue to count down the days. Remember, it may seem like a long time, but you are always one day closer to being together forever.
              sigpic

              To read our love story, click here.

              Comment


                #8
                Look at it this way, there will always be something to be jealous about. There will always be a couple who met sooner, or visited more often, or got married/had babies sooner. But they're fighting their own battles.

                It's normal to be jealous but it's also good to remind yourself that each couple has their own struggles.

                Comment


                  #9
                  I understand how you feel. I met my SO in January 2010 and we've been talking almost everyday ever since. Even though he fell in love with me way before I did I only started developing feelings for him in a romantic in June of 2012 and we soon decided to go long distance (I did hesitate though). I have yet to meet him as well and it's been around 3 years since we met so no rush! I think patience is something that we both learned to deal with and makes us yearn to meet the other badly.
                  Some people also said it would be best if he came to visit me first, but I wanna be the first so that I get to know more about his culture and his lifestyle. After 3 years I never expected things to turn out this way and it's still unbelievable when I remind myself I get to see him in March in his country.

                  It's normal to feel jealous, I also do, specially since there's a girl in the dorm where I'm in that is in a LDR and her SO lives in the country right next to ours so she gets to see him very often while meeting my SO once a year would be like a dream for me (and even so our stays can't be long because our holidays never match). And this is embarrassing, but whenever I pass by one of those shops that sell/make wedding dresses I find myself dreaming about the future. I actually find peace in that and I'm in no rush as I know we both won't be closing the distance in the near future. But since my SO has been chasing me for almost 2 years I can hope to be patience enough for our own future and hopefully get to close the distance. For now I will cherish the times we get to spend time with each other.

                  So, keep looking forward for that meeting! I know I am! =)

                  Looking for the future...


                  First Meeting: March 20 2016
                  Got separated: August 2016
                  Reunion: July 2017
                  Officially together: January 2018
                  ... And many meetings later ...

                  Comment


                    #10
                    You're preaching to the choir here.
                    It took us about six years to even meet each other, granted we were not dating but we very much liked each other.
                    Sometimes it just hurts and while yes everyone had to go through the same thing but I just wished we can CD sooner than three-four years.
                    I want to see him so badly and it always hurts to leave him. Hopefully, I can see him one more time this year.

                    It would be great if we were just a few hours away, that way I wouldn't feel like I would be taking him away from his friends and family and vice versa.
                    Only time will tell.

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