Mom just found out! Uh-oh!!

[ImInLoveWithAnEnglishman]

So somehow my mom got onto my Facebook and saw the messages between myself and my SO and everything just went downhill from there. I got lucky enough that she didn't take away my phone or laptop or anything but she's a bit skeptical. I'm worried. I don't know what's going on and she knows he's a lot older. I don't think I could stand it if she made us stop talking.

I think things are okay now, just one more year...

Ugh, he's all I've got right now. I can't lose him...

[.:*Shaunna*:.]

I'm sorry to hear about your mums reaction. My mum wasn't too thrilled either but mainly because she doesn't want me moving from Australia to Memphis. Sometimes it's 'normal' for a mum to want to protect their children evn if they over kill it at times. Have you tried talking to her about it letting her know how you feel?

[ImInLoveWithAnEnglishman]

I'm sorry to hear about your mums reaction. My mum wasn't too thrilled either but mainly because she doesn't want me moving from Australia to Memphis. Sometimes it's 'normal' for a mum to want to protect their children evn if they over kill it at times. Have you tried talking to her about it letting her know how you feel?

Yes, but she is set in stone on the idea that he is too old for me. I'm not your everyday 16 year old. I don't get along well with people my age and she can't seem to grasp that concept. I've already told her that I'm not going to run away with him like in some romance movie for goodness sake. She just doesn't understand. If it was just one year from now, when I'm 18, she wouldn't care either way.

[lyonsgirl]

She just doesn't understand. If it was just one year from now, when I'm 18, she wouldn't care either way.

I highly doubt that your mom is going to magically stop caring what you do when you turn 18. I do, however, understand that you fully believe that she just doesn't understand. And you're right, she probably doesn't - has she ever met anyone online? How old is he? Have you sat down and talked to her - like an adult - about it? If you haven't, now's the time.

Ask her when she's free, because you'd really like to talk about your situation. The kicker, here, though, is that you absolutely must remain calm throughout the entire conversation no matter what. If she says something that upsets you, you cannot stomp off to your room yelling "You'll never understand!" because if you want to be treated like an adult, which I'm assuming you do, you have to start acting like one.

[CynicalQuixotic]

Yes, but she is set in stone on the idea that he is too old for me. I'm not your everyday 16 year old. I don't get along well with people my age and she can't seem to grasp that concept. I've already told her that I'm not going to run away with him like in some romance movie for goodness sake. She just doesn't understand. If it was just one year from now, when I'm 18, she wouldn't care either way.

Everyone thinks they're not "the average insert-age-between-13-and-18-here" year-old. You are, I promise. There's a big difference between 16 and 22, and I don't blame your mom for being concerned. I would be too. All you can do is wait it out, really, because your mom is probably not going to change her mind until you're considerably older.

Basically, everything lyonsgirl said.

[MeganK]

My SO is older then me im only 21 and hes 33 but idc about his age tbh and I don't care what anyone thinks about it, it sucks when u don't have ur parents approval my moms ok with it tbh my dad is a total dick and cant stand alex and thinks im making a mistake, well parents are there to protect I think that is what ur moms doing she wants wats best for u

[Catface]

To try and see it from your mother's eyes. You need to understand that while your SO might be the real deal, there are also lots of preditors out there looking for people your age. The news is full of people getting hurt, kidnapped etc by online preditors and I'm betting that's the only thing she knows about it. She wouldn't want you to be in that situation and would certainly be trying to make sure it didn't happen to you.

Like everyone else is saying, sit down with her, bring your facts to the table with you and discuss it like an adult. Perhaps you can come to an understanding.

Best of luck!

[libelle]

Haha, i remember that feeling so well .. Couple months after him and me started online dating, each had a huge folder of pictures of the other one, since we sent them all the time <3 And no need to explain there were some that werent quite appropriate ... And one day mom had looked through my files and somehow found the folder of his pictures ..... Imagine how it was, all skies fell upon my head, i thought i wouldnt get alive out of it She forbid me to talk to him, but i didnt listen to her and now, one year and 4 months in the relationship, after 2 visits of his here, my mom accepted him and even likes him! Such a drastic change. So dont worry, give her time, of course as a parent she will be worried about you. She will get used to it eventually, and its also up to you two to prove that you are serious about eachother and that she can trust you Good luck!!!