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How do you guys cope with a rough time?

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    How do you guys cope with a rough time?

    I'm sure many of us go through good and bad days with our LDR. My "bad days" have extended to weeks. I recently finished my spring semester of college and I currently don't work and I'm going a little crazy! My SO and I don't talk as much as I would like since he works long hours and is 6 hours ahead of me. I'm having a really difficult time with all of this. Just wondering how some of you deal with a rough patch when your away from your SO?

    #2
    I do more things. You said you're not busy. Get busy. Find a new hobby. Get a job. Go out with friends.


    2016 Goal: Buy a house.
    Progress: Complete!

    2017 Goal: Pay off credit card debt
    Progress: Working on it.

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      #3
      Originally posted by lyonsgirl View Post
      I do more things. You said you're not busy. Get busy. Find a new hobby. Get a job. Go out with friends.
      I'm going to try to get into a hobby I like. I'm planning on visiting my SO For a month this summer so I think finding a new job would be unfair to the employer by stating I wouldn't be around for a month.

      Thanks.

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        #4
        I get superbusy with volunteering, friends and tandems! (have you thought about learning a new language or the language of your SO?).
        I also knit a lot and I will start a big blanket for our future house, as I have like 2 months to do it and it keeps me busy doing something for us, and I prepare handmande presents for my SO, too

        Keeping yourself busy with things you like will make you feel more complete and happy, therefore more satisfied with the rough patch!

        One thing that works so so so nice for me is just walk everywhere I go. I take 1 hour walking to go to my university and this gives me energy for the day. but the good thing is it also gives me a positive energie and confidence when I do it regularly, and I will feel happier in the long term. I think this might be useful! Sometimes I go to a place walking and then return by bus, but when I have time I go walking too. Just put your headphones on and enjoy the sun and the walking itself!

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          #5
          Fabiana,

          It is ok to feel the way you do, distance can suck. But that is not where the story has to end.
          Definitely pick up something or things to keep your mind busy. Do set up dates with SO to make sure you are in touch on a regular basis. My SO is also 6 hours ahead so we exchange emails a lot to talk about our days or whatever. We skype at least once a week... it is not an option
          Maybe you can start a project to be enjoyed by you and SO when you visit? (an album, a coupon book that gives him passes to do/request xyz while you are visiting...) that will make you feel closer to him... I think.

          Hang in there, it will be soon and you'll be with him... and this episode will be long forgotten.

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            #6
            like the others say, keep busy find something to do clean out that closet that you keep forgetting or something, pick up a hobby make something for him (found that that mostly does it for me)
            but it is hard especially when you'r a bit down
            good luck!!

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              #7
              a) I spend time on this forum so I don't feel so alone in my misery
              b) I teach myself a new skill - recently I learned how to make my own earrings.
              c) Exercise, so at least I sleep well on my own.
              d) Start planning ahead for my next trip, so it doesn't feel so far away.

              Essentially, get busy! Good luck x
              London girl, American cowboy. "Like a western Dirty Dancing."

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                #8
                I write. Something he inspired me to get back into. But basically that's just a form of staying busy, like everyone else has said. Good luck!


                When we love, it isn't because the person's perfect, it's because we learn to see an imperfect person perfectly.

                True love does not worry about the distance between, for the heart and soul travels through one's words

                When two people are meant for each other, no time is too long, no distance is too far, and no one can ever tear them apart.

                1 universe, 9 planets, 7 continents, 194 countries, 50 states and 10 provinces...and I had the privilege to meet you.

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                  #9
                  "Be busy"... Well, that's not always possible. I know it's the go-to advice but I also had some days (sometimes even a week) where I could just not find any motivation and there was really nothing else to do.
                  It happens.. and it sucks, big time.

                  In your case: get the tickets for your trip so you have a set date to count down to! For the time before that: indeed, do as much as possible!

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                    #10
                    Originally posted by Safihre View Post
                    "Be busy"... Well, that's not always possible. I know it's the go-to advice but I also had some days (sometimes even a week) where I could just not find any motivation and there was really nothing else to do.
                    It happens.. and it sucks, big time.

                    In your case: get the tickets for your trip so you have a set date to count down to! For the time before that: indeed, do as much as possible!
                    Believe me, I understand that but the way I actually fight lack of motivation is by forcing me doing stuff. Because I already know that when I have sth to do, I always feel better afterwards. As I acknowledge that sometimes Im just in a bad week, I give myself a finite amount of time to be upset and then I make an effort. That is the way that keeps me going and what I wrote before works for me...

                    Sometimes we just need someone to tell us what we already know, in this case, the go-to advice!

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                      #11
                      I started a blog! It might seem like it's not a big thing, but whenever I miss him too much I post some stuff on the blog for him to read! At first he didn't check it out a lot, he hardly ever read what I posted until I had like 8 pages of stuff and he read them all at once and now he checks it a couple times a day! It also gives us something to talk about
                      A tumblr is very easy to make and you'll find it can be very fun to read and reblog pictures

                      Relationship began: 05/22/2012
                      First Met: 03/21/2013 - 03/30/2013
                      Second Visit: 06/06/2013 - 08/21/2013 ~ Proposal: 07/06/2013 ♥
                      Third Visit: 10/09/2013 - 01/08/2013
                      Closed the distance: 11/20/2014 ♥
                      Married: 1/24/2015
                      Became Resident: 9/14/2015

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                        #12
                        Is there anything that you've been meaning to do, but always don't find the motivation/time to do so? I do have my bored moments too - but only when I'm not online, I have already done my exercise and I don't have the motivation to work on my writing. When I do find it though, it's what keeps me busy. Either those two or going places/shopping with my mom. There's plenty to keep busy with while you wait.

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                          #13
                          Like others have said, I stay busy. I write for a "job" and so I'll keep focused on that, or on my uni work, which I do part time. Sometimes you do have to push yourself to do things when you have no enthusiasm for it, but it is worth it in the end!
                          Joey & Scott
                          Met: April 2002
                          Lost Contact: August 2002
                          Reconnected: April 2010
                          Together: May 20th 2010






                          [COLOR="#800080"]"Do not anticipate trouble, or worry about what may never happen. Keep in the sunlight." Benjamin Franklin

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                            #14
                            Thank you all for the advice.

                            I haven't recently started to read again. It's been one of my hobbies for years but for some reason I've out it off. Anyway, reading really makes me forget whatever is bothering me at the time so it has really help distract me. I'm also planning on becoming more active and have considered joining a gym. Thanks again for the advice, it's great to know that you all have been through similar situations.

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                              #15
                              Work and games, is all I do right now until we are together, then I can be myself more lol

                              "Buddha made you for me" - My SO



                              1st Met/Visit: Nov 2012 - Thailand
                              2nd Visit: May 2013 - Thailand
                              3rd Visit: Jun 2013 - Thailand
                              4th Visit: Sep 2013 - Thailand
                              5th Visit: Sep 2013 - Jan 2014 - UK
                              6th Visit: Apr 2014 - Thailand - Marry
                              7th Visit: Sept 14th 2014 - Thailand - Wedding Ceremony / Party
                              Close the distance - Sept 21st 2014 - UK
                              UK Wedding Party: November 8th 2014

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