Language barriers and host gift when meeting his family?

[conejita_hada]

A bit of background, I'm in my SO's country (Guatemala) for the summer, I live in a different town but we see each other on Sundays.

Today we were FB messaging and I asked what time/when to meet tomorrow. He responded that his aunt invited them over for lunch then asked if I wanted to go. I have yet to meet his family aside from chatting with two of his brothers on FB and meeting his sister once. I know the general consensus is that his family likes me and doesn't care that I'm a gringa.

Among my thoughts of excitement and nervousness, I'm wondering if I should bring a host gift although I'm not sure who the gift would go to or what it would be. I would give the gift to his aunt but then I wouldn't feel right not giving something to his mother. I've come to understand that here it is somewhat customary to bring a small gift when invited to a home where you haven't met the people but I'm torn on if and what to give as it's also just a family lunch they do fairly regularly. I don't have anything to give from the US which is usually what is suggested and I feel weird giving anything too expensive or non-practical since his family isn't well-off and basically just gets by with no frills. I've sent a message to my SO asking what he thinks but I have a feeling his response will be to not bring anything. I was raised that I should bring something and really, I just want to make sure I do the right thing so I wanted others opinions.

I also wanted to know how/if anyone has dealt with language barriers when meeting their SO's family? I'm a bit terrified as my Spanish isn't that awesome - I just started learning it again this January after only taking beginning level in high school over 6 years ago. I can understand Spanish very well but have a hard time speaking it especially with people I don't know and if I'm feeling anxious. None of his family knows English; he doesn't either but my comfort level with him is super high so it doesn't matter to me if I have to take 5 minutes to say one sentence. When I met his sister, I did apologize and told her the reason I wasn't speaking much was due to my being generally shy, she said it wasn't an issue. I think this anxiety is just in my own head. haha

I just really want them to like me because his family is close and he's the oldest of 7 siblings; I don't want to be a bad reflection for him.

TL;DR: Should I bring a host gift to his aunt's house if I haven't even met his parents yet? They will all be there, it's a usual Sunday family lunch. Also, have you had an experience with language barriers when meeting your SO's family?

[Anoulie]

As for things to bring, the obvious would be something alcoholic (like wine), something sweet (like a box of chocolates) and/or something pretty (like flowers).

[kittyo9]

I don't really know about bringing host gifts, because the only person I had to ask about gifts and stuff was my SO, so I just brought some things from the states and gave them to his mom when I went. I asked my SO about bringing gifts to his aunt's house and for his cousin when we went to go visit her, but he always said it was fine not to bring anything, so I didn't 'cause I didn't have anything to bring otherwise.

The language barrier is something I'm more familiar with. I don't speak Spanish at all, really, except for a very limited vocabulary, and his family doesn't speak English at all, with the exception of his cousin. I just had my SO talking or translating for me the whole time. With his mother, since we were living with her, she would teach me simple words to try to communicate with me while he wasn't there.

However, if you're able to speak with your SO enough to maintain a relationship, I am confident that you'll be able to speak with his family! He can help you along and speak for you when you need him to. Just be polite and be yourself.

[conejita_hada]

Thanks for the responses! After talking to him, he's insistent I don't bring anything. He said a boyfriend gives the girlfriend's family gifts but not the other way around. I'm thinking I may bring coffee anyway because the good stuff here can be expensive but I'll talk to him once more in the morning.
I'm hoping I retain my vocabulary to at least say small sentences. Otherwise, I'll just smile and look pretty. (jk)

[jo28]

Well, the times I came to visit my SO, I brought something from Puerto Rico..something small, (obviously) like candies and coffee. I think it's a good sign if you bring something to the host, even if it is some flowers...the coffee seems like a great idea to me!

As for the language barrier...I do speak Italian (I'm actually graduated in Languages) but the first time I came here, I didn't know as much and I was a nervous wreck! X) But I manage to communicate between Spanish and Italian...or my SO would translate if I was in trouble! Just be confident and smile! Even if you don't talk a lot, a smile is universal!

[digitalfever]

I would bring a "thank you card" and some coffee. Fill out the card when you leave and give it to them before you leave.

[abna1]

I had the same problems a couple of weeks ago. "Luckily", my SOs family is so huge that he insisted I shouldn't bring gifts for everyone we would be visiting. I also just brought some small gifts from Germany for his siblings. I think coffee is a great idea !

As far as the language barrier goes. Theoretically, I should be fine with English (seen as though it's the official language)... but no ! Apart from his relatives that are in their 20s and few uncles, none of them speak English. There are 81 (!) different languages spoken in Ghana. I'm currently trying my best to learn 2 of them very well, but I'm still terrible. I can greet them, that's about it. I could also talk about fruit, clothes or what time it is For everything other than that, I let my SO talk. He occasionally translates for me so I can be part of the conversation. The rest of the time, I stand there and smile like an idiot.
But I'll get there soon hopefully !
I wish you fun and endurance with perfecting your Spanish

[Sukkerklumpen]

I was thinking of this too after the first visit to Norway. I wanted to get my in-laws something to show my gratitude of them having me over and being AMAZING hosts. On my second visit I brought them a small table piece art handmade by artists of the island that represented my culture. They loved it ♥ As I was giving it to them I was speaking English and my SO translating, lol.