Patience

[leahmango]

I don't know how others are doing this, loving from so far. I have been okay with it, of course there have been ups n downs but recently I have been having more trouble accepting it than other days, I don't know how to deal cope up with all this.

[lea22]

do you have an end date?

[delightful]

I'm not sure how long you've been doing long distance for in your relationship, but from personal experience, I find that you can really experience some highs and some very low, lows. I sometimes also suffer from not knowing how to cope with it all, it sometimes it really does overwhelm me to the point where I feel like I can't cope anymore but I'm still here, after over a year of doing this because of one reason: Him.
I've also found that when we know when we're going to be back together, the time til then somehow tends to get harder; when you're so close it feels like everyday hurts so damn much, and I really haven't worked out why!
All I can say is that an LDR requires a lot of time, patience and energy and that you both have to be willing to put in as much effort as each other or you really will find yourself struggling to cope. Best of luck with it all!

[Freebird]

I am a very impatient person. Always have been.

But somehow, at least so far, I've been able to cope. I think the main reason why is because I'm thinking of the future and the "end". Even though my SO is over 5000 miles away in a different country across a gigantic ocean, he's worth whatever I have to go through to get to him. Distance, the time we spend away from each other, and money... if we both stay dedicated all of those things can be overcome. That is what keeps me going.

Perhaps you can do the same to help you better cope with being in an international LDR? Think of how things can be if you just keep going on and stay dedicated.

[silvermoonfairy3]

Patience is always a struggle for me, especially caring so much about him.

For me, when I start to get to those low points, I ask myself if I would really want to end it with him. If I'm at a point where I actually think not being with him ever would be better than having to endure this situation for the chance to be with him in person. I always immediately remember how incredible he is and how it's worth it.

It can be so hard to look at the situation when it's sucking and you're lonely, but maybe try to remember all the reasons you want to be with your SO in the first place.

[squeeker]

Patience is always a struggle for me, especially caring so much about him.

For me, when I start to get to those low points, I ask myself if I would really want to end it with him. If I'm at a point where I actually think not being with him ever would be better than having to endure this situation for the chance to be with him in person. I always immediately remember how incredible he is and how it's worth it.

It can be so hard to look at the situation when it's sucking and you're lonely, but maybe try to remember all the reasons you want to be with your SO in the first place.

Yes, this, this is something I use too.. whenever I go through one of the "low" points.. I know I would much rather be in a LDR with my SO, even if an end date, or even a future visit, sometimes seems so far away, I'd rather have that than not be with him. And it helps me through it. When you get low, try and remember all the good things with your SO and how much you love them and would rather be with them in an LDR than not at all (if that's true, which I would assume it is but I don't know people's relationships, people are at all sorts of levels in their relationships)

[leahmango]

Thank you all for your inspirational thoughts, fact is I just graduated from college and am going threw a highly intense job process, and frankly I just miss him. Sometimes I just want to talk to someone about all this but of course with time differences and his priorities as well we sometimes never get a chance. I think well he knows exactly what I am going through because he is going through it as well but then I sit alone and have no one to talk to. Of course no one around me knows what it feels like as well, sometimes he and I both get frustrated then we end up arguing and of course that doesn't help anything. Like freebird said the money is a pain and I have yet to meet him but after I get this job I will be going to see him. We have been together for a little over 2 years now and I can't let go. Anyways it wouldn't matter if I ended it, what would happen? I know, I would end up thinking of him day in and day out anyways, he is my soul mate and it is crazy the feelings and things we have in common from so far.

[Moon]

Patience is always hard in an LDR, indeed. Unfortunately, it's also a necessity It's OK to have days where you feel like you can't take it anymore, every one of us on this forum knows how that feels. While that feeling never totally goes away, some days are a lot worse than others. You've been doing this for almost two years, you can do a little more, just try getting through today, tomorrow might be a little better. International LDR's are no joke, huh? While going through such a stressful time, please remember to be kind to yourself, and focus on the future. Eh, I've always found ice cream helps a little bit! Good luck.

[.:*Shaunna*:.]

Patience can be a struggle for me as we are still a fair way off yet (hopefully 2015) as my savings still aren't where I want them to be but I am working on it. I just keep day dreaming lol I definately can relate to how you are feeling