Disappointment with Castle (BIG spoilers)

[Hollandia]

I don't know how many of the rest of you watch this show or not, but last week's episode was a bit of a let down for me. They had turned Beckett (the female lead cop) and Castle (the male lead writer)into an LDR couple. Now, he had gone ahead and proposed to her anyway after learning of this. She had taken a job in Washington DC to work for for Feds, a great career boost for her and he still lived in NYC with his mom and sometimes daughter. I am not certain but I think it was about 4 months ago this happened and at the end of the ep this week, they both declared "this is not working" and he gets them a new apartment in DC where they can live happily ever after. Something happens soon after and it all becomes a moot point, but this is not what upset me.

They were only apart for a few months, they were able to see each other at least every 6 weeks and he is filthy rich. Yet, "this is not working". This is why people think that those of us in long term LDR are nuts and so therefore our relationships are doomed or not "real" like the CD ones. I know this is just TV make believe but if a rich man living a few hundred miles away from his fiancee cannot make it more than four months what does say about those of us struggling for money, thousands of miles away and from different countries? I know ALL LDR's are hard but this thread is about the perception by outsiders like our friends and family and a hit TV show like this is certainly not helping that.

What are the rest of your thoughts on this episode and how TV and Movies are depicting us and how that is affecting your relationships with family and friends?

[snow_girl]

I think it's just a show and you shouldn't think that much into it. They probably have to keep the story moving in some direction and keeping them apart was not part of the plot line. Also if you had the money would you not buy an apartment so you could be closer to your SO? I sure would, no one wants to be LDR so why stay LDR if you don't have to? It wasn't working for them as much as it works CD, I think that is a fair statement to make and doesn't suggest that any LDRs are doomed. No one chooses distance over being close.

[Hollandia]

I think it's just a show and you shouldn't think that much into it. They probably have to keep the story moving in some direction and keeping them apart was not part of the plot line. Also if you had the money would you not buy an apartment so you could be closer to your SO? I sure would, no one wants to be LDR so why stay LDR if you don't have to? It wasn't working for them as much as it works CD, I think that is a fair statement to make and doesn't suggest that any LDRs are doomed. No one chooses distance over being close.

I know it is just a show, but my response is about the perception it is creating for those not in LDRs. I don't take issue with him moving to her, I take issue with the "this is not working" comment after a short period of time when they were still seeing each other every 6 weeks or less. This makes it look like if that is such a trial then the rest of us in these international long term LDRs must be delusional and so therefore our relationships are unrealistic.

[lucybelle]

LDRs are not for everyone. Maybe it was too much for Castle and Becker?

[Dziubka]

I know it is just a show, but my response is about the perception it is creating for those not in LDRs. I don't take issue with him moving to her, I take issue with the "this is not working" comment after a short period of time when they were still seeing each other every 6 weeks or less. This makes it look like if that is such a trial then the rest of us in these international long term LDRs must be delusional and so therefore our relationships are unrealistic.

I don't think this is true and I agree with lucybelle: LDRs aren't for everyone. It doesn't mean they're not real or valid.

I don't think I could have an intercontinental LDR or any relationship where I'd see my SO less than once a month. It doesn't mean that I think those relationships are delusional or unrealistic. It just means that I wouldn't be happy in such a relationship. I would have said "This is not working" before the relationship even became long distance.
People are different. Some people might not be happy in my relationship. And guess what? They don't have to, because they're not in it.

[Hollandia]

I think everyone has their limits but there is a huge difference between a few hundred miles that don't have to worry about immigration laws and those that that do. This episode took the smallest type of LDR there is and made it sound so drastic that it needed to end in four months. My whole point is that not all of us are rich enough to just buy another apartment and/or have the ability legally to move to their loved one so are we appearing delusional to do it to others that are NOT in an LDR. I am going to just agree to disagree and drop it. It is one thing to disagree but another to try to state my opinion is not true. They are all just opinions. It does not make mine true or false or yours right or wrong.

This ep actually made me sad and did not help with those doubts you get in a long term international LDR.

[lyonsgirl]

I feel like this is going to turn into another one of the "you're not really long distance if..." arguments. It's hard enough seeing each other as it is and we're not international or intercontinental. Every relationship has challenges, but no relationship has the exact same challenges.

[Hollandia]

I feel like this is going to turn into another one of the "you're not really long distance if..." arguments. It's hard enough seeing each other as it is and we're not international or intercontinental. Every relationship has challenges, but no relationship has the exact same challenges.

This is in an international thread. We all have our challenges but I have LAWS keeping me from visiting my SO and even if we had time off from work, school and other obligations and had the money to do it, we are not legally allowed to see each other more than a certain amount or at certain times. This does not mean non international relationships are not really long distance and nobody said that, but there are certain road blocks that international ones have that non do not. This was not about THAT, it as about how this TV show ep made this short term, with frequent visits, unlimited funds and with no legal boundaries still appear to be something that people cannot handle. I agree that if the thread turns into a debate over that issue, I will close it.

With so many LDRs having their families and friends think of their LDR as unreal then I am surprised you all don't take any issue with this LDR portrayal in a major hit Tv Show that many of them could be watching.

[snow_girl]

I think you just made it in to what lyonsgirl said it would.

[lyonsgirl]

I suppose I should have said instead, "this is probably going to turn into a "who's problem is harder" contest" instead. Personally, I'm not a fan. I understand there are laws and everything you have to abide by, and I do understand it sucks. I'm not saying my situation sucks more than yours or yours sucks more than mine. They both suck. The difference is the reason why they suck - not how much they suck.

[Hollandia]

The thread was about the specific example of the TV show and their exact situation, non international. I made the thread and I am in an international LDR so I posted from my outlook and asked about the perceptions of how this ep made LDR look to outside non LDR friends and family that watch it.

I am going to just go ahead and close it because only one of the posts actually even responded to the concept of perception by outsiders as a result of the show.