U.S.- U.K relationship advice and help needed! overwhelmed!

[DylanDarkheart]

i am in a international relationship with a British citizen her names kayleigh i love her like no other but im 19 and shes 18 we have been dating for about 9 months and with american immigration law and what not changing so much i am kind of lost on what to do;

we met on twitter when i replied to a tweet of hers, and that's when the back and forth flirting started and then we continued to tweet and talk for sometime, and then eventually we started Skypeing and quickly fell in love and decided we want to spend the rest of our lives side by side, we added each other on Facebook and now we try to video chat at least once a night whilst she is in college for university


im still young and i don't have alot of money to throw around so i cant afford a immigration lawyer or anything
but because we are young we don't know whats the best way to proceed with things and whenever i try combing thru the internet to find help i get overwhelmed, and ultimately stop till i decide to try again.
~she is going to try and come over to america next year to go to school here on a student visa i assume,
-can i marry her in a courthouse when she comes over so i can fill a spouse form? or how should i go about making sure me and her can live out our lives together, as soon as possible
-im still living with my parents and she was going to stay with me while she goes to college for counseling and im going to be going to school for massage therapy, ( during the time i will probably get my own apartment) but after we both finish school here, we would like to go back to England together to live and make a life for ourselves or possibly to Canada if that's easier in British Columbia,

so if anyone could list in basic terms what we need to do to be able to come together as soon as possible even if its not student visa that's fine please help us ive been trying to research ideas for a couple months but please use this format as well as list things she will need to bring i know her birth certificate but i am not sure what else, as i said before i am very overwhelmed and don't really know what to do but i obviously don't want to give up and just hope for the best, but yes please help im quite desperate

him(being me):
-task a
-task b
-task c and so on

her:
-task a
-task b
-task c

[lucybelle]

Task A (for both)- wait 4 years or so before you think of doing something drastic, like marriage.

[squeeker]

Task A (for both)- wait 4 years or so before you think of doing something drastic, like marriage.

Well said, concise and I like it and it gets the biggest point across I think.

But since this issue is close to my heart because it involves a U.K. linked relationship, I have to say a bit more. I'm bad at being concise.

I think that should be the biggest thing, is to have patience. If she really is the one you want to be with forever, you will survive taking the time to do it properly. You haven't been dating very long, and you are very young. I'm not against young marriages, but there is no rush. I also understand wanting to close the distance as soon as possible. But if you hurry you may miss an important step and it might mess things up. Also, be sure to take the time to research each of your options thoroughly and make sure you both are on the same page of what you want. And also be prepared for changes. Be flexible. Since starting my relationship with my partner, we have had to be flexible many many times. Guess what though? It's all worth it.

I do applaud your desire to move to England or Canada as they are two of my favourite places, Wales being the third. Eventually when you are ready, you can look into closing the distance via a student visa if you want, just as long as you make sure you have enough finances (student loans probably won't cover all of the international tuition) and basically finances are the thing stopping most long distance couples from closing the distance as soon as you want. So take some time and save up. It might be best to study in your own countries first anyways.

I really wanted to study in the U.K. to be closer to my boyfriend, but with the excess costs that would put on me/us, I am now studying in my home province of BC, while he is studying in the U.K. We will have about 4 years probably of continued long distance. Though, as the years go by we will get closer to our goal, and that will be exciting. Though we do go through many times where it feels so much. And we both have extreme pressures on ourselves because we want to close the distance as soon as possible, but we can't so quickly.

Take things a day at a time. It's okay to talk about where you want to be in the future, but save the serious planning until you have been together a few years and also have had a few visits together to make sure you know what you are getting into.