Disturbed by the sexual past (and present) of my SO

[Ahava]

You have gotten some good advice on this thread already, but this stood out for me



I think you're idealizing those prostitutes way too much.

My thoughts exactly.
If we forget the movie Pretty Woman, I would imagine that a lot of girls/women who turn to prostitution (if not traficked/forced) do that to get money to pay for their their drug use etc. And drug addicts aren't perfect and gorgeous.

[silvermoonfairy3]

I'm not trying to sound self-righteous or high and mighty.
But in an open relationship, having one night stands is part of it. It doesn't bother him, and it doesn't bother me when he tells me he had sex with a girl and then left the next morning with no exchange of phone numbers

I think that varies a bit by couple, actually.
I know couples in an open relationship who actually aren't into one-night stands at all, but use the open relationship status as a way to date and possibly have a recurring sex partner. (And in one case, that turned into a poly relationship for 3 of them for awhile, though it ultimately didn't work out.)

Have you and your partner been clear on what "open relationship" specifically means to the two of you, not just applied the term assuming you agreed on its' meaning?
(Like, does he know it's *always* one night stands/no exchange of numbers, etc.)

[Dziubka]

I have very conflicting views on prostitution that I don't have time to elaborate on right now, but prostitution in Eastern European countries is much different than Australia or New Zealand. I may get flak for this, but I think you should think about whether you want to be with someone who is complicit in propagating an institution as economically exploitative to women as barely-regulated prostitution.

I think we had a thread on the same topic a while ago (I can't find it anymore, but I remember I argued with snow).

The idea of paying for sex, and having sex with someone who needs to have sex with you in order to pay for their rent/drug habbit/food/whatever seems fundamentally wrong to me.

[Malaga]

The idea of paying for sex, and having sex with someone who needs to have sex with you in order to pay for their rent/drug habbit/food/whatever seems fundamentally wrong to me.

Yes. I have all the support for sex workers, none for for the customers.