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Nervous about meeting the family

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    Nervous about meeting the family

    In November I'm flying over to Peru to spend two months with my SO and I couldn't be more excited to see the country he comes from, experience his culture and become immersed in his life. I don't speak much Spanish though and it seems slow going on my trying to learn it! Partly because of this language barrier and partly because of the cultural differences I am getting increasingly more nervous about actually meeting and staying with his family!

    My SO has a son and spends time with him on Saturdays and both he and I think it might be a little much to just throw me into the mix straight away so I know I will have at least a few hours on Saturdays without my SO able to act as interpreter, and I don't want to just stay quiet as that might come across as rude!

    Do any of you lovely people have any good advice or ideas to make the whole meeting the family thing a little smoother?! I'm sure I can't be the only one that has a situation like this!

    Thanks! B x

    #2
    1. Try to pick up on the language. I think Babbel.com (that I use to learn Turkish) has Spanish as one of their languages. I don't know about their Spanish, but in my experience with Turkish they make language fun! Also, there are lots of web pages etc. where you can learn about the country, culture and custums.
    2. Try to find other family members/friends who can translate when SO is not there, if anyone there knows English.
    3. Bring gifts...ask SO what they might like/not like. Perhaps something from your country.
    4. Volenteer to do things around the house, especially to aid things the others are already doing, like doing the dishes, setting the table and so on. When I visited my SO's family I did the dishes (I did them wrong, according to SO's mother, which is now the joke of the family. At least I tried!), me and SO made desserts for everyone, I plucked oranges from their trees and I fed the cows. We also bought stuff for around the house, like wine and tea.
    5. Smile
    6. Embrace your role as a "clown" that is not going to understand all or do everything right.
    Good luck, I am sure it wil be lots of fun
    I made love to him only twice, she thought and looked at the man laying asleep beside her. And yet still it is as if we have been together forever, as if he has always known my life, my soul, my body, my light, my pain
    - Paulo Coelho, "Eleven minutes"



    "Bız yüzyılın aşkı vardır" - We have dated since Sept. 2013. To see our full story, click here https://members.lovingfromadistance....and-our-visits

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      #3
      Thanks for the advice!

      I have babbel and about a million books to learn Spanish! I'm hoping his sister will have learnt some more English so I won't be completely out of luck! Gifts are a definite as I'll be there over christmas but some for when I arrive will definitely be a good idea!

      Housewifery is going to be top of my list, being Peru I kinda need to convince his mum I'll be a good wife to have a hope in hell of spending my life with him and it being peaceful!

      B x

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        #4
        For "welcome" gifts I bring Snickers candy bars to his family - it's hugely expensive there and they looove them. That way, you aren't bring double the gifts - candy from your country will probably be something they don't get often and a fun treat before Christmastime. When I met my SO's family I smiled a lot in reply because I wasn't that versed in Spanish, apparently it made me appear sweet. I've also cooked a meal for them, as a thank you for always inviting me to their home for dinner.
        If you have contact possibility with his sister, maybe try talking with her over the next few months in Spanish. If she's learning English, then maybe she can write/speak English to you and you write/speak Spanish to her? That way, it helps you practice the Spanish but also builds a relationship with a member of his family before you stay with them.
        When two hearts are meant for each other, no distance is too far,
        no time is too long, and no other love can break them apart.

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          #5
          The others have already given some good advice. Definitely try to pick up a bit of Spanish and use it here and there. It doesn't have to correct all the time, so don't worry about making mistakes. They'll definitely appreciate the effort. I also just smile when I don't understand what they're saying

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            #6
            Thanks everyone for the ideas... I think the candy thing could be a definite winner, I'll have to ask my OH what types would go down well

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              #7
              I think that as long as you make the effort to know some Spanish and reach out to them, you'll be fine. You'll probably have a couple awkward moments but be positive and maybe get them to teach you some words/phrases to build a bit of a relationship (even if it's on humor at your attempts alone! :P) I like the idea of helping out around the house, too, as you won't just be sitting there doing nothing.
              In all the world there is no heart for me like yours.
              In all the world there is no love for you like mine.
              -- Maya Angelou

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