Hello there!This is my first post to the forum and i would like to apologies in advance if this is going to be long. I just wanted to share my experience after i broke up with my ex in 3 months of our LDR relationship.Its been 2 weeks we havent talked and i just want to talk with someone anyone because the feeling of sadness and grief is taking me over.He is from Austria 25 and i am from Greece 30 thats our age difference
We started talking after being in a year in the same Whats App group with people who sharrd the same interest in music.We suppose to be friends at facebook but we really didnt interact either Facebook either Whats App.And one day out of the blue he send me a private text and we started talking.
First phase : We start talking...Alot! It was summer and he and me was in vacation and we were in chill and relaxing mood.So we started talking and he literally bombed me!What i mean? He started talking to me giving mr attention flirting with me all innocent and in general we started to talk about everything. Third day after the endless hours we were talking he admitted that he is interesting to me and wonders why he has not talked more to me and he plans to Skype and meet me as well.I (red flag) I was shocked because it was totally unexpected.I was flattered.I didnt believe him but the thing i said was it was nice to hear him says that but i wanted to talk to him more to get to know him more maybe to Skype when i feel i can trust me too) and we will see. He said yes he totally respect that. And he was more into me all over
The meeting : I didnt realise how fast things were going between us.We begin talking all day long.And i started to falling hard for him because i had a sense that something will happened.I ask him why he started talking to me out of the blue and he said that he didnt knew either only that he knew yhat he had to text me and he knew that it will worked between us.Things after we Skype chaged alot because as you can imagine there was so chemistry that i dont know how the pc screens didnt explode.
First meeting and the broke up : One of the biggest mistake we both did is that we jump into way too much fast.He came to visit me after 3,5 weeks after we start talking.Dont get me wrong i wanted too see him but i had to control it me and him and the same time. 5 days we spend together it was amazing and in all terms. It was like honeymoon but normal at the same time. Dont get me wrong we connect and click in too many levels chemistry and attraction was too much but at the same time we had moments of normalency that it was too weird. Ofcource after he left things was so bad specially emotionally for both of us but for him spesific. We had our ups and down we continue texting,talking to the phone,Skype constantly. We had are good moments and our bad but we we handle it.What i didnt realise back then was how much emotional unstable he was (red flag)
Second meeting and first broke up : He came and visit me after one month and this time he stayed in my place.It was 6 amazing days and seeing in my enviropment it was just awesome to see and think how we will be together in the future.And i see he felt it the same way..But didnt realise how he can have influence around him (red flag) So when he left we talked the next time in Skype and he broke up with me saying i am too good with him and i deserve something better. First time i see a couple to talk 6 hours of broking up and crying together,which we did
Reunite again,2 weeks together,Final Broke up : We didnt talked 5 days.And those days were so long to me.But i wake up on Monday morning and i refuse to give up.And i tezt him for some random thing and he reply.That day i used reversed psychology to him saying that i cant be with hm but i cant be his friend and all i want to contact (one of many example of many) We talked for hours like this playing mouse and cat and dont admit feelings till he explode and told me everything like how bad he was feeling,now much he cry and how he hasnt throw my stuff..We talked at Skype the same night so yeah..
It was amazing to be together again and for a week all returned back to normal. But it didnt suppose to happened for long.This time i was the reason that he broke up.He accuse me for when he trying everything for us i dont do anything like finding a job (which is hard here),fixing my sleep rythym and most important to talk with my parents so i can visit him there (parents very overprotective) So we broke up because he lost the trust that i can do this and to me in heneral and he is tired because he needed space for his friends for his house and tired for the things between us.He was saying,after 6 hours of texting,that i should try to work harder to forget that i have to focus in my life to friends and found a job.He thanked me for helping him with his personal demons and that i Shouldnt think that its easy for him.Lies,Lies and again Lies!
He blocked me from Facebook after 1 week and from Skype,Whats app,Viper. Its ironic because he lie to me so much aboud this and even that he is direct honest he never admit it to me.Ocource i was never one of those womam that will contact him,but i guess thats what he meant that we both need distance from our feelings so i can focus.He didnt realise that made me worse emotionally.
What i have learned?
There were so many red flags that i didnt notice.And i feel stupit i didnt too be honest.For example like how much unstable he was in a way,how much needy he was saying to me he was about me.How much unpatient he was and how super fast he was at some points .How much he was freaking out at some point he was when i didnt reply to his text. I have done mistakes too i was weak to set my personal goals like getting a job talking with my parents being too much emotional,sensitive and giving him too much i guess like my trust and my own heart.We were both jump into one another we were very emotional attached each other and we were very overthinking and needy too each other (he was even more than i was) We were like two planets crashing each othrr two magnets coming closer no matter what.
Apologies again for the huge post i wanted to talk with somebody about this thats all.
Maria
We started talking after being in a year in the same Whats App group with people who sharrd the same interest in music.We suppose to be friends at facebook but we really didnt interact either Facebook either Whats App.And one day out of the blue he send me a private text and we started talking.
First phase : We start talking...Alot! It was summer and he and me was in vacation and we were in chill and relaxing mood.So we started talking and he literally bombed me!What i mean? He started talking to me giving mr attention flirting with me all innocent and in general we started to talk about everything. Third day after the endless hours we were talking he admitted that he is interesting to me and wonders why he has not talked more to me and he plans to Skype and meet me as well.I (red flag) I was shocked because it was totally unexpected.I was flattered.I didnt believe him but the thing i said was it was nice to hear him says that but i wanted to talk to him more to get to know him more maybe to Skype when i feel i can trust me too) and we will see. He said yes he totally respect that. And he was more into me all over
The meeting : I didnt realise how fast things were going between us.We begin talking all day long.And i started to falling hard for him because i had a sense that something will happened.I ask him why he started talking to me out of the blue and he said that he didnt knew either only that he knew yhat he had to text me and he knew that it will worked between us.Things after we Skype chaged alot because as you can imagine there was so chemistry that i dont know how the pc screens didnt explode.
First meeting and the broke up : One of the biggest mistake we both did is that we jump into way too much fast.He came to visit me after 3,5 weeks after we start talking.Dont get me wrong i wanted too see him but i had to control it me and him and the same time. 5 days we spend together it was amazing and in all terms. It was like honeymoon but normal at the same time. Dont get me wrong we connect and click in too many levels chemistry and attraction was too much but at the same time we had moments of normalency that it was too weird. Ofcource after he left things was so bad specially emotionally for both of us but for him spesific. We had our ups and down we continue texting,talking to the phone,Skype constantly. We had are good moments and our bad but we we handle it.What i didnt realise back then was how much emotional unstable he was (red flag)
Second meeting and first broke up : He came and visit me after one month and this time he stayed in my place.It was 6 amazing days and seeing in my enviropment it was just awesome to see and think how we will be together in the future.And i see he felt it the same way..But didnt realise how he can have influence around him (red flag) So when he left we talked the next time in Skype and he broke up with me saying i am too good with him and i deserve something better. First time i see a couple to talk 6 hours of broking up and crying together,which we did
Reunite again,2 weeks together,Final Broke up : We didnt talked 5 days.And those days were so long to me.But i wake up on Monday morning and i refuse to give up.And i tezt him for some random thing and he reply.That day i used reversed psychology to him saying that i cant be with hm but i cant be his friend and all i want to contact (one of many example of many) We talked for hours like this playing mouse and cat and dont admit feelings till he explode and told me everything like how bad he was feeling,now much he cry and how he hasnt throw my stuff..We talked at Skype the same night so yeah..
It was amazing to be together again and for a week all returned back to normal. But it didnt suppose to happened for long.This time i was the reason that he broke up.He accuse me for when he trying everything for us i dont do anything like finding a job (which is hard here),fixing my sleep rythym and most important to talk with my parents so i can visit him there (parents very overprotective) So we broke up because he lost the trust that i can do this and to me in heneral and he is tired because he needed space for his friends for his house and tired for the things between us.He was saying,after 6 hours of texting,that i should try to work harder to forget that i have to focus in my life to friends and found a job.He thanked me for helping him with his personal demons and that i Shouldnt think that its easy for him.Lies,Lies and again Lies!
He blocked me from Facebook after 1 week and from Skype,Whats app,Viper. Its ironic because he lie to me so much aboud this and even that he is direct honest he never admit it to me.Ocource i was never one of those womam that will contact him,but i guess thats what he meant that we both need distance from our feelings so i can focus.He didnt realise that made me worse emotionally.
What i have learned?
There were so many red flags that i didnt notice.And i feel stupit i didnt too be honest.For example like how much unstable he was in a way,how much needy he was saying to me he was about me.How much unpatient he was and how super fast he was at some points .How much he was freaking out at some point he was when i didnt reply to his text. I have done mistakes too i was weak to set my personal goals like getting a job talking with my parents being too much emotional,sensitive and giving him too much i guess like my trust and my own heart.We were both jump into one another we were very emotional attached each other and we were very overthinking and needy too each other (he was even more than i was) We were like two planets crashing each othrr two magnets coming closer no matter what.
Apologies again for the huge post i wanted to talk with somebody about this thats all.
Maria