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A really need a shoulder to cry on right now...

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    A really need a shoulder to cry on right now...

    Hey guys,

    long time no see, huh? How's everbody doing?

    Okay, so as you all know me and my now fiance filed the petition for the Visa.
    Now we have to wait something between like 5 - 8 months.
    Until then, I have to get my drivers license here in Germany, and it is expensive. like 1000 €.
    So far so good. I am in a situation, where I am lucky to save "enough" money ...within let's say 7 months I can save about 5000 €. (what is enough money to start a new life though...future hubby is in the military fyi)

    Now what I am trying to say is, that right now I am not strong enough...not that I want to end this relationship, no absolutely not, but I feel really weak right now and I don't know what to do about it.
    I hate to think about money, I hate to think about the time we have to wait until we can be together again, I hate that everything seems so far away and complicated right now.
    I am shaking, I am cold, my head is aching, plus I am frustrated.

    So, can you guys give me any tips to survive this moment in my life right now?

    Feeling so crappy :/

    #2
    Keep yourself busy with preparations for the future. Think about your wedding! 90 days is not a long time to get everything settled and the sooner you start to plan for your wedding the better! Try to think of a theme and look for inspirations online! Pinterest is your friend

    The time you spend waiting is the last time you will be away from your fiance, so just enjoy it! I know you miss him, trust me, I've been there, but try to spend time with your family and friends, because you will not see them for a LONG time once you're in the states! Give yourself some time to enjoy yourself!

    Relationship began: 05/22/2012
    First Met: 03/21/2013 - 03/30/2013
    Second Visit: 06/06/2013 - 08/21/2013 ~ Proposal: 07/06/2013 ♥
    Third Visit: 10/09/2013 - 01/08/2013
    Closed the distance: 11/20/2014 ♥
    Married: 1/24/2015
    Became Resident: 9/14/2015

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      #3
      Lets be in crappy club together! Money is superhard here, too. I had my paycheck less then two weeks ago and I am almost broke - and I have to rent a hotel room when he comes. I am trying to learn his language, while buying/selling flats (I have lived in this one for 13 years, I am tired of these walls), I have health issues... Life seems very complicated, and I have felt very lonely in this situation. I know that I can take only one more season of me holding the backbone of our economy, and that next year things will have to change somehow (I hope to earn more, and that he will either come here to work or find a better payed job there).

      My best tip is...trying to do one thing at a time. Find joy in the little things. Be sure to not be too serious, or you will break your neck over this. It is very cold in Norway now, is it in Germany too? I have my fav wollen sweater (I have given so a similar one, which means I can think of him everytime I wear it), an electrical heating carpet, a very large tea cup. Something good to eat, a nice movie.... It is getting lighter every day, soon it will be spring....
      Last edited by differentcountries; February 3, 2015, 07:37 PM.
      I made love to him only twice, she thought and looked at the man laying asleep beside her. And yet still it is as if we have been together forever, as if he has always known my life, my soul, my body, my light, my pain
      - Paulo Coelho, "Eleven minutes"



      "Bız yüzyılın aşkı vardır" - We have dated since Sept. 2013. To see our full story, click here https://members.lovingfromadistance....and-our-visits

      Comment


        #4
        thanks for your answers!

        Yes, I know I should probably spend more time with family and friends. THe thing is, that my family lives like 400 km away from me and friends...well the only good friend I have is a mom of two girls and quite busy...
        But I started learning portuguese to keep me distracted.
        And you are right differentcountries...only a couple of weeks left and spring is finally here. I really hope that will light up my mood.
        One thing I could never sleep without is his T-Shirt. I have two of them. I put them on my pillow or hold them tight until I fall asleep. This is at least something.
        And yes, it is pretty cold right now. But I guess not as cold as in Norway. It even snowed today but most of it melted away already.

        It is always good to know that there are people I can talk to who are going through the same situation like me.

        Maybe you want to take a look at my engagement ring. I posted a picture of it

        Comment


          #5
          I hear you. My SO and I are saving to close the distance which had meant we are putting work over visits. At the moment we are unclear when our next visit is. It's hard but we know it's a sacrifice to save money to be together. I get dishearted too but then I remember why I'm doing this, to form a life with my SO. Your sacrifice will be worth it too, just keep reminding yourself of that. Feel free to PM me if you want to chat. But as snow said, keep yourself busy and try to keep upbeat. I know its hard but this place can always help. It's help me a lot. Hope I helped a bit.

          Comment


            #6
            Originally posted by Alma View Post
            Maybe you want to take a look at my engagement ring. I posted a picture of it
            Your ring looks lovely It is so nice to have something to remember our SOs by.
            I made love to him only twice, she thought and looked at the man laying asleep beside her. And yet still it is as if we have been together forever, as if he has always known my life, my soul, my body, my light, my pain
            - Paulo Coelho, "Eleven minutes"



            "Bız yüzyılın aşkı vardır" - We have dated since Sept. 2013. To see our full story, click here https://members.lovingfromadistance....and-our-visits

            Comment


              #7
              You know you're in the right place. You have a huge support system. Maybe try working out? A new regimen will not only boost your mood, but will make you strong and healthy for your upcoming marriage and lifestyle!
              It's such a bittersweet thing these LDR's. I'm in my first one and am constantly feeling the roller coaster of emotions. Blessings be honey. If you need more support. DM me anytime! Every day passing is a day closer to your love.

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