How do i stop worrying about my relationship

[simpleflower101]

Hi Guy's, I been with my SO for 1 yr and 2 months, we had our 2nd meeting last May this yr and we had 2 wonderful weeks together. I love him and i do trust him but when he is here i feel that he hide something from me, so when he got drunk he gave me his phone and i know it is wrong but i am tempted to check his skype msg. I found out that he have conversation with woman that he met online 2 months ago before he visited me. I ask him to come with me in my room and i ask who is the woman in skype, he said he is drunk when he start conversation with the girl and he just msg the girl for fun (they exchanging pictures and do skype together and they call each other baby for a 1 week) he said he stop msg that woman because he knows it is wrong after a week of conversation. He ask me for forgiveness and he promise that he will not do it again. I forgive him because i know he loves me (he flew 8,300 miles to visit me) and i love him, we had so much fun in the rest of his vacation. He said once he get a job and home he will prepare my paper works for visa so we can live together, but its almost a month and he doesn't send resume or finding job he keep focusing playing online games with friends, when i ask him to skype with me later or tom he will said sure, but because of being busy in his game we don't have time to skype now its almost 1 month when he got back and we don't skype, he seems grumpy this past few days when i want to talk to him, he tells me "Make a Movie Drama Queen Lol" that is make me feel upset, that is when i say what i feel and why he doesn't like to skype, why i feel that games is much important than me, why he doesn't want me to comment in his fb and he doesn't like put pictures of us... he said his life is private that's why he doesn't put pictures of us i do understand bec maybe he doesn't like his kids to know that he have gf which is twins 9 yrs old daughter, until now i am trying to give my full trust after the incident of talking a woman, i am worried about my relationship bec i feel he is bored in our relationship that's why he doesn't talk much and i don't know how serious he is in our relationship even if i knew that he visit me twice and spend money even if he doesn't have job just to meet me.. i love him and i miss him so much

Thanks for reading my story even if its a bit long. I am open to all suggestions and advice

[differentcountries]

I would worry too if I did not see signs of him doing the things we agreed upon.

[SailorRei]

Tiny advice: please use commas and full sentences. This piece is extremely hard to read and almost impossible to understand.

[differentcountries]

https://dyslexiaparents.blogspot.no/...nctuation.html

[simpleflower101]

Sorry if its hard to understand my story, I am not really good in English, but still thank you, i will try to learn sentences and commas

[Harlequin]

Something is up. I don't know if he's still talking to other women, or if he's simply bored of your relationship, but there's something going on that he doesn't want to talk to you about for whatever reason. I can't say I blame you for being so worried, because I would be as well. It sounds very much like you are more invested than he is, and honestly, I don't know if he's worth the effort? Honestly, I would have torn him a new one at the "make a movie, drama queen lol". That's incredibly disrespectful and says that he does not take you or your concerns seriously at all. That's not how relationships should be.
Spending money to come out and see you doesn't necessarily mean much. People can do all sorts of really nice or otherwise impressive things, and then suddenly have a change of heart.

Has he always treated you like this? Or did it only start after you found out about the skype thing? I don't think there's a good answer to either question. Overall, I think you should try to look at your situation objectively. I understand that you love him and you miss him, but reflect on how he's actually treating you. Talk to him about your concerns, and if he really can't be bothered to talk things out, then he really isn't worth your time. A relationship cannot last if you cannot communicate, and it always sucks to be made to feel bad or like you aren't being taken seriously.

If you're still unsure, what would you tell someone who came to you with this exact same problem? Knowing all the details you do, what would you tell this person to do?


I'm not advocating you immediately dump this guy, though. If you think he's worth it, then you need to give it a fighting chance, I suppose. I just don't think he takes you or your relationship seriously, and no one deserves that.

[simpleflower101]

well he just being grumpy one week after he visited me, i don't know the reason why he change and become grumpy while we had so much fun in our vacation. Do you guy's think that his attitude is because he is a Combat Military before?

We had skype issue this morning, I am asking to skype today, he said skype is not important because we talked everyday in FB, we watched online movie and play some online games together, but i told him that skype is good for our relationship even just once a month, he only reply "I Know" so i stop talk to him for an hour

Today he msg me "I'm sorry, the only reason I am grumpy is because I'm tired. There's no other reason"

Sometimes its hard for me to understand his Attitude, He will be grumpy for no reason at all then he will said sorry
I am still confused if i will keep him or not, I love him but i don't like how he treated me when he is grumpy. Now i don't know if he still worth it.