Reconnecting

[MissingMyDutchLove]

Hello all! After almost 2 years of off and on LD, I feel like almost a pro these days. However, lately the tried and true tricks of reconnecting with my SO haven't been working. He's working extremely long hours and staying up late to talk to me, which means that our conversations have been pretty platonic and boring lately. Those are fine for the most part as we just want to hear about each other's days, but I'm dying to reconnect with him in a fun, flirty, romantic way. In the past, date nights have worked where we watch movies or play games or something on that order, but now those seem to just make it worse because that means that we aren't talking those nights. Anyone have any ideas or things that have worked for you to reconnect with your SO despite less than ideal skyping situations?

[Miasmata]

Well, if you really gotta compromise, I honestly think the way you've been doing it is fine. My SO and I are CD, but he leaves for work early in the morning and doesn't come home until late at night, so we have very little time together. I make things dependent on his mood; sometimes he wants to unwind by talking, sometimes he'd rather watch a show, and sometimes he just wants to enjoy each other's presence without doing much at all. Often, we can compromise on something we both want, and do our best to make the most of it. What I've also found to be helpful is to message him or have him message me when he's on lunch break at work (any kind of messaging app will do, as long as he has a phone or different device at work he can use for it). Even if we only talk for a few minutes, it shows that we're thinking about each other, and gives us more times to talk rather than just burdening it all on the late evening.

Also, what about the weekend, or days off he might have? Those would be perfect for your partner to both get some rest, but also to do something bigger together. Then you don't have to worry about date nights taking away from anything else.

[differentcountries]

I have been long distance internationally for two years also. During season, his long hours has always been a problem, especially in June-August. In the beginning, he would often stay up late to talk to me but now that I am working and he is working even more (more responsability at work plus extra job on some days) that is hard. We Skype less and less and now if I even get him on Skype once a week he is usually yawning after 5 minutes so it is more like seeing his face and goodbye. It is easier just to stay in touch texting/sending pictures because that is more flexible. He doesn't have off days and seldom fewer hours, so for us there is no way to be more in contact over the distance until the season slows down. Luckily I can visit him often (but then he has the same hours so the difference is really I can touch him). I just try to get busy with other things and work on figuring out his visa/future work situation.