Using Facebook to test their loyalty with this sneaky trick..would they cheat on you?

[johncampbell]

So I just found a service called "Bait My Date" baitmydate (.) c o m and they have good looking m/f who will contact your partner on facebook messenger and try and flirt with them then they send you the screen shot. I think im going to try this but if they fall for it and i approach them do they have a right to know the truth?

[MarsDamnSure]

I personally wouldn't use anything like this. I think if you feel you need to test them, then you don't trust them. I understand that jealousy can be a hard part of long distance relationships so why pay someone to flirt with your SO? Ive witnessed people try to flirt with mine, and its horrible, don't get me wrong, she will just stop talking to them if they do flirt or message me, but its still not nice. So to actively get someone to do so seems weird.
And what about when they tell the baiter to jog on? Will you feel relieved? tell them you did that and they "passed"? Because im sure that would go down well. Or would you not be satisfied and find a reason they didn't flirt back, "the bait wasn't their type" "she was having a busy day and didn't have time".....

Each to their own and all that, but when you are considering "baiting" someone you love.....I think its time to revaluate the relationship. Just that word..."bait".


Or maybe you work for that company and trying to drum up business?

[differentcountries]

This is just about as smart as fucking for cellebacy and having a war to create peace. All you do is paying a company to try to make your SO fall into a trap that you set up for them. All that really proves is that you have trust issues.

[MissButterfly]

Or maybe you work for that company and trying to drum up business?

Sounds very probable to me. New account, teenage behaviour but older guy.

[MarsDamnSure]

Sounds very probable to me. New account, teenage behaviour but older guy.

Plus title of thread sounds like a slogan or tag line from an ad. Preying on those who, when feel insecure or worried, cant just hold their SO.

[Mims27]

Dumbest thing ever. Someone setting up their partner like that is just as bad as them taking the bait and cheating.
I also think the poster works for the company...

[Miasmata]

This kinda thing preys on people's insecurities in their relationship and it's disgusting for everyone involved. Don't bully insecure people into doing this kinda thing, and don't use this kinda service on your partner instead of actually talking issues out. If you want a trusting, strong relationship, baiting them with a crappy Facebook service is the exact and total opposite of trusting. Get that junk out of here.

[R&R]

I agree with everyone else. If you have to do this, you already have trust issues in your relationship to deal with. If you would stoop so low as to do this, make your own fake account and do it and don't pay someone to do your own damn dirty work.

[Mims27]

Just wanted to add: If I ever found out my SO did something this shitty, I would be livid. What a serious way to kill trust in a relationship.

[LivingInWonderland]

I was going to post something on this last night, shortly after it was posted. But the title sounded so much like someone trying to sell something that I figured it was probably spam.

But for the chance that it's not, I will say this.... This is such a horrible thing to do to your significant other. To go behind their back and do something like this, all because you can't just trust their word? If you love someone and you commit yourself to a monogamous relationship with them, and they do the same, you should be doing your part to trust the other person in the relationship. How would you feel if your partner did this to you? If my boyfriend did this to me, I would be furious. And extremely hurt. I have nothing to hide. I would never cheat on him. So yeah, this test would fail. But it would still beyond hurt me, because all it would do is show me that he can't trust my word. Instead he would have gone behind my back to do something this ridiculous, all so he could sleep better at night. Which I am sure is what you are doing right now.

If you want to lose all trust in your relationship, and hurt your SO, by all means. Do it. But don't be surprised if your relationship doesn't last long afterwards.

A successful relationship is about trust. When you commit yourself to a relationship, both partners are supposed to trust each other to commit AND do their part to commit themselves. If your relationship doesn't have trust, it may never be a sound relationship. To go behind your partners back and do something so sneaky and invasive, is just showing just how untrusting you are towards your partners word.

This is honestly the dumbest thing I have ever seen. The fact that there are people out there that would actually use something like this.... Ughh.

[Miasmata]

The more I think about this, the dumber it gets. Open/polygamous relationships exist, too, and they are not inherently less committed or real than any other. By nature, this kinda "service" falls flat immediately on any kind of relationship that's not strictly monogamous, because there, flirting was likely agreed upon to be okay. And even within monogamous relationships, this still assumes that ALL people, regardless of gender, would immediately be tempted by someone of the gender(s) they are attracted to. As if all people everywhere are obsessed with sex at any given point and will be open to this kinda thing. What if I'm busy? What if the "service person" is not my type? What if I plainly don't give a hoot about being flirted with no matter where I am?

I absolutely know I'm thinking too hard about this and getting worked up over a stupid scam post. I'm just so incredibly sick of this disgusting kind of culture stuff like this pushes. People are not constantly obsessed with sex, and just because the media love pushing it hard doesn't mean it's true, or right. Just because the media keep pushing cheating as the #1 answer/explanation for any relationship worry and people are shamed for sexuality no matter if they have a lot of it, none at all, or only some, doesn't mean it's okay.

I'm incredibly sexpositive, I have an open relationship with liberal boundaries, tons of communication and no major jealousy, and even I am sick to death of having sexuality and cheater narratives shoved in my face all the time. If you have a problem with something in your relationship, don't make horrible assumptions, don't listen to crappy cliches and magazines, talk about it. It can be hard, but there is no good compromise when it comes to trust and communication. The world might be pretty crazy for sex, but it's no way as crazy as this kinda crap.

Sorry for that furious post, but it's a topic I feel strongly about. Having too many genitals and suggestive stuff shoved in your face every single day will do that to you.

[hmrambling]

I think im going to try this but if they fall for it and i approach them do they have a right to know the truth?

Your partner has a right to not trust you after this trickery.

IMHO if this sort of product (website) appeals to you, then you do not trust your partner. I suspect that your relationship has a lot to be desired already if this is something that you want to try.

I would not do this to my partner. Everything about it seems unhealthy. I preach all the time that trust is not earned. If my partner did this to me, it would certainly cause me to doubt her.

ETA:
I am not a fan of "tests of loyalty." These sound like games to me. :thumbsdown: No, just no. You would soon be an ex if you tried this with me.

[Honour]

So let me get this straight... "bait my date?" Why the... urgh no, it hurts my head to consider why anyone would do this shit. Totally pathetic. Do yourself a favour and don't post anything else OP.