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    I don't know what's going on

    I don't know if this is the right place to post this, but I really need some help:

    So long story short, my boyfriend moved away to Norway about 3 months ago. We were perfectly fine whenever we'd talk before school started for him.
    Once school did start (last month), he hasn't contacted me. I've left messages for him and he hasn't responded to me in a week or so. He goes does go on facebook, but all I see him do if add more friends (....lots of girls lately too) but he has not responded to me. It's really killing me I'm reallly new to LDR's so I don't know if this is normal or common to go through.

    I mean, he could be busy with school and getting to know all his new friends, but I don't see why he can't just even just say "hi" to me.

    Am I over thinking things and simply being jealous? Is this type of sitiuation normal in LDR's??

    ..... worst case scenario... do you think he could already be moving on??

    #2
    Have you not spoken to him at all since he started school? If not, then I might perceive his lack of initiative in contacting me as an indicator that he may no longer be interested. I would hope that he would at least have the courtesy to say that things are over, but he might not be very considerate. I would take into consideration if it has been only a few days that he might be busy with school, but if we had no contact for a week or more, I would begin to have my doubts.

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      #3
      Last week was his first week of school, so I was thinking that he may be extremely busy (he doesn't speak Norwegian, but he goes to school there so I'm sure he may have been having a bit of ....hard time which is why I didn't freak out at the time).

      The last I spoke to him, he said he was going to get the (facebook) Messanger app to contact me especially because you can make phone calls through it and he said he would try to call me as soon as he can. That's the last I heard from him once school started over there.

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        #4
        Break up with him.
        Best, CC.
        Love is patient, Love is kind, Love never fails.

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          #5
          Originally posted by voskaya View Post
          Last week was his first week of school, so I was thinking that he may be extremely busy (he doesn't speak Norwegian, but he goes to school there so I'm sure he may have been having a bit of ....hard time which is why I didn't freak out at the time).

          The last I spoke to him, he said he was going to get the (facebook) Messanger app to contact me especially because you can make phone calls through it and he said he would try to call me as soon as he can. That's the last I heard from him once school started over there.
          What kind of special school does he attend? Is it Birkeland folkehøyskole?

          If he is new at learning language the situation is a bit special. But a lot of international students attend folkehøyskole, I am sure he will be fine, and learn language as he goes along.

          He might be very busy. I remember my first weeks at folkehøyskole as very confusing - and I speak Norwegian! Why don't you call him, he might enjoy hearing from you.
          I made love to him only twice, she thought and looked at the man laying asleep beside her. And yet still it is as if we have been together forever, as if he has always known my life, my soul, my body, my light, my pain
          - Paulo Coelho, "Eleven minutes"



          "Bız yüzyılın aşkı vardır" - We have dated since Sept. 2013. To see our full story, click here https://members.lovingfromadistance....and-our-visits

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            #6
            If I were you, I would make it clear that this lack of communication is not acceptable and that he needs to make an effort to improve it. I get starting school and being busy and overwhelmed. I don't get not taking five minutes in a day to at least say hi to your SO or talk about your day. You need to make it clear that this can't continue and see from there if things continue or not. It really helps having a set schedule to talk in. Whether it's skype dates or just every day messages, a set time makes it so much more of a given routine instead of a random thing. Maybe suggest daily messages before he goes to bed and you can do the same to talk about your days? If he can't possibly spare five minutes to write you a message before he goes to bed then something is seriously wrong.

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              #7
              Originally posted by lykim View Post
              Break up with him.
              Best, CC.
              Wow, how about you actually give the OP some food for thought instead of ordering a person you don't know and who doesn't know you around?

              ~
              It'll take a lot more than words and guns
              A whole lot more than riches and muscle
              The hands of the many must join as one
              And together we'll cross the river

              Comment


                #8
                Originally posted by Miasmata View Post
                Wow, how about you actually give the OP some food for thought instead of ordering a person you don't know and who doesn't know you around?
                Because I'm not going to sugar coat that this relationship is going to work as it's clearly not, I gave my answer is as short and sweet way as possible.
                Love is patient, Love is kind, Love never fails.

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                  #9
                  Originally posted by lykim View Post
                  Because I'm not going to sugar coat that this relationship is going to work as it's clearly not, I gave my answer is as short and sweet way as possible.
                  There's a difference between "This isn't looking great OP, here's some stuff to consider" and "Break up". None of us here have any way to 100% judge this situation, we can just make educated guesses and give advice based on that. You are acting presumptous and tactless, and I say that as someone who's a big fan of being honest and direct. Obviously, it's up to the OP whether they consider your advice valid or not, but I don't think you are much of a help when all you got is "break up", with no reasoning and no food for thought attached whatsoever. Put some effort and empathy into the people you want to help, if you genuinely want to help, or don't bother, please.

                  ~
                  It'll take a lot more than words and guns
                  A whole lot more than riches and muscle
                  The hands of the many must join as one
                  And together we'll cross the river

                  Comment

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