The story of how he found me.
Hey there. I joined not too long ago and you're probably seen me around trying to give advice. Not like I know it all or am a love guru... but i've been through my fair share of LDR experiences, good and bad. But i'm about to tell you a story...
---
Last year i had an emotional breakdown due to stress from work, feeling lonely and being turned down by a crush in a cruel way. I went in for medical help for my insomnia, depression and social anxiety, so i was medicated pretty much all the time and had a strict bedtime schedule.
One night, i remembered i had to let a friend/coworker know about something right after i took my sleeping pill. So i sat on my desk and reached out to her via Facebook. I guess around 20 minutes passed and my brain just shut off. I remember stumbling to bed and falling asleep. The next morning, i woke up to an unread message from my friend. Turns out i had an entire convo with her (which i have no memory of) and that read something about a friend of hers requesting me to add him on facebook. I didn't even get his name right, and she said "he's a friend of mine, he's in film school and won't hurt you". So i guess that convinced me to approve his request.
A couple of hours later, he messaged me asking what my favorite movie was. And the texting became very frequent. He admitted he saw my profile picture and thought i was gorgeous and wanted to know more about me since my profile was private, so i thought it was just another player...plus i wasn't used to getting called pretty or anything similar. He lived in a neighboring country (with dual citizenship of my own), and i was very heartbroken and a mess at the time so i didn't even try to like him, but i needed someone to talk to and he seemed to enjoy doing so. He was going through similar stuff, going to therapy, battling emotions. We bonded.
Weeks passed and while he was always flirty, i couldn't bring myself to admit i was feeling things for him. Plus, i had a LDR before that went as bad as it could've gotten. I WAS NOT GONNA BE FOOLED AGAIN! But me being as impatient as i am, i told him i was feeling things for him. He did too...until he began backpedaling one day after his mom went to visit him and they had a talk about who knows what. I felt awful, like i had no chance and it was a step back on me trying to be happy again. Even my friend asked him and he denied ever having true feelings for me. But this didn't last long...the next day, he admitted he DID have strong feelings for me and wanted things to be like before. Also, his plan was to move back to my country once he was done with film school...so there was the glimmer of hope anything could happen. This has been the only time we remained silent for a day.
Months passed, ups and downs, him trying to cope with being committed to someone who wasn't there and hadn't even met, me trying to keep my feet on the ground and not get my hopes up. I was scared of being rejected like many times before. I told him i loved him. He was shocked and needed time to process that (he thought i was a crazy ass woman) but as we got close to meeting, he told me he loved me like he never loved anyone before.
January: He was supposed to come visit his family after the holidays and was staying for a month. He texted me saying "hey, i'm coming over the day after tomorrow!"
so i naturally freaked out and had a panic attack. I spent the next two days crying my eyeballs out from anxiety until i went to pick him up at this mom's house. My legs were shaking like never before, to the point i almost rear ended another car. It was all very awkward, he seemed grumpy and i was a nervous wreck. We picked up some sushi and went back to my house,and i already had a sinking feeling... I've always been self conscious about my body, battling my weight my whole life and feeling i was never pretty enough like other girls. So in my mind i truly thought it was the end. That was until i gave him a present i had for him, a book i thought he might like...then we sat on the edge on my bed and he grabbed my shaky hands and kissed me. He attributes him being grumpy because he was hungry and we were taking forever to get food. Now i know this man needs to be fed!
Fast forward...after two more trips, one half way and me visiting him for a week, and my brother serving us as the mail man (he would travel there monthly because of his job and we would send care packages and cards to each other) he decided he couldn't see me cry no more, that skype wasn't enough and that he needed us to be together. 3 weeks later in August, he moved here with his maternal family and we've become inseparable. There have been few scuffs between our families (possessive, jealous latin american moms) and he has yet to finish his thesis (he will have to travel back and forth later on for a bit, couple of days at a time) but it's all been worth it.
It's been over a year now since we first started talking, and 11 months of official dating. I'm meeting up with him in a couple of hours after we get off from work and will talk about everyday things, like how we need to get food for my cats and news on video games and MTG spoilers.
There is not one day(or hours) he doesn't tell me how much he loves me, my flaws, my virtues and I'm the best thing that ever happened to him, and honestly...he's all
i ever dreamed of. We are best friends, lovers and partners in crime. We found love over Facebook, on the lowest point of our lives after we got out hearts broken by every other person... and technically while i was on drugs.
---
Last year i had an emotional breakdown due to stress from work, feeling lonely and being turned down by a crush in a cruel way. I went in for medical help for my insomnia, depression and social anxiety, so i was medicated pretty much all the time and had a strict bedtime schedule.
One night, i remembered i had to let a friend/coworker know about something right after i took my sleeping pill. So i sat on my desk and reached out to her via Facebook. I guess around 20 minutes passed and my brain just shut off. I remember stumbling to bed and falling asleep. The next morning, i woke up to an unread message from my friend. Turns out i had an entire convo with her (which i have no memory of) and that read something about a friend of hers requesting me to add him on facebook. I didn't even get his name right, and she said "he's a friend of mine, he's in film school and won't hurt you". So i guess that convinced me to approve his request.
A couple of hours later, he messaged me asking what my favorite movie was. And the texting became very frequent. He admitted he saw my profile picture and thought i was gorgeous and wanted to know more about me since my profile was private, so i thought it was just another player...plus i wasn't used to getting called pretty or anything similar. He lived in a neighboring country (with dual citizenship of my own), and i was very heartbroken and a mess at the time so i didn't even try to like him, but i needed someone to talk to and he seemed to enjoy doing so. He was going through similar stuff, going to therapy, battling emotions. We bonded.
Weeks passed and while he was always flirty, i couldn't bring myself to admit i was feeling things for him. Plus, i had a LDR before that went as bad as it could've gotten. I WAS NOT GONNA BE FOOLED AGAIN! But me being as impatient as i am, i told him i was feeling things for him. He did too...until he began backpedaling one day after his mom went to visit him and they had a talk about who knows what. I felt awful, like i had no chance and it was a step back on me trying to be happy again. Even my friend asked him and he denied ever having true feelings for me. But this didn't last long...the next day, he admitted he DID have strong feelings for me and wanted things to be like before. Also, his plan was to move back to my country once he was done with film school...so there was the glimmer of hope anything could happen. This has been the only time we remained silent for a day.
Months passed, ups and downs, him trying to cope with being committed to someone who wasn't there and hadn't even met, me trying to keep my feet on the ground and not get my hopes up. I was scared of being rejected like many times before. I told him i loved him. He was shocked and needed time to process that (he thought i was a crazy ass woman) but as we got close to meeting, he told me he loved me like he never loved anyone before.
January: He was supposed to come visit his family after the holidays and was staying for a month. He texted me saying "hey, i'm coming over the day after tomorrow!"
so i naturally freaked out and had a panic attack. I spent the next two days crying my eyeballs out from anxiety until i went to pick him up at this mom's house. My legs were shaking like never before, to the point i almost rear ended another car. It was all very awkward, he seemed grumpy and i was a nervous wreck. We picked up some sushi and went back to my house,and i already had a sinking feeling... I've always been self conscious about my body, battling my weight my whole life and feeling i was never pretty enough like other girls. So in my mind i truly thought it was the end. That was until i gave him a present i had for him, a book i thought he might like...then we sat on the edge on my bed and he grabbed my shaky hands and kissed me. He attributes him being grumpy because he was hungry and we were taking forever to get food. Now i know this man needs to be fed!
Fast forward...after two more trips, one half way and me visiting him for a week, and my brother serving us as the mail man (he would travel there monthly because of his job and we would send care packages and cards to each other) he decided he couldn't see me cry no more, that skype wasn't enough and that he needed us to be together. 3 weeks later in August, he moved here with his maternal family and we've become inseparable. There have been few scuffs between our families (possessive, jealous latin american moms) and he has yet to finish his thesis (he will have to travel back and forth later on for a bit, couple of days at a time) but it's all been worth it.
It's been over a year now since we first started talking, and 11 months of official dating. I'm meeting up with him in a couple of hours after we get off from work and will talk about everyday things, like how we need to get food for my cats and news on video games and MTG spoilers.
There is not one day(or hours) he doesn't tell me how much he loves me, my flaws, my virtues and I'm the best thing that ever happened to him, and honestly...he's all
i ever dreamed of. We are best friends, lovers and partners in crime. We found love over Facebook, on the lowest point of our lives after we got out hearts broken by every other person... and technically while i was on drugs.
Hoping i can give some advice. LDR dreams do come true!
Comment