Is there anything I can say to help him?

[leroysam1]

At the moment, my SO works two jobs, one full-time and one part-time. He ends up working seven days a week, including both jobs on Tuesday and Thursday. In a couple months the Tuesday/Thursday will end, but he will still be working seven days a week. Lately he has been kinda down. He has a lot going on with work, he's traveling to visit his family soon, moving apartments, trying to stay sane and have a social life, and sometimes feeling guilty that he doesn't make enough time for me. I'm terrible with words and comforting people, especially on FaceTime. I have sent long texts explaining how he makes plenty of time for me and I love him for that, which I hope helps him a little. Any other ideas on how to help calm him down? He's like me sometimes, overthinking so much that it's hard to sleep.

[kittyxuchiha11]

Honestly there isn't really anything you can do but you be there for him if he needs you and comfort him when he's down. Maybe you could do little things that might make him smile like when you send him a message write it on a piece of paper then take a picture so you can can decorate that message with as many hearts and things to show that you love him and hey it;'s something different that i know always makes both em and my SO smile. I know the feeling of being terrible with words and not knowing how to comfort people so i always have a bunch of cute pictures of animals on hand to send or something like that to cheer people up. Basically just try think of little ways to show him you love him rather than just say it/write it in a text :3

[WildFirefly]

We're in the very same boat!
My SO works one job but it's a very tough one, as he too works seven days a week; sometimes he does get a day or two off but it's usually when the weather doesn't allow him to work or his boss simply doesn't need his help, otherwise he's always busy. I am guilty of making him feel like he doesn't care about us that much and sometimes I admit to have been very mean and sometimes even egocentric. However, things are now different. We both talked about it and made our needs clear, so that we both know what's going on when we don't hear of one another. I actually appreciate that he works so much and still finds a way to keep intouch with me.

Back to your question, I don't think you can possibly change his situation or calm him down completely from a distance. However, what you can do is show him support and appreciation for all his struggles and aknowledge his issues while allowing him to let it all out. Words might fail you but showing that you actually care and understand surly will help to ease his mind. If you don't feel comfortable with words, you might want to send him a song which explains what you feel... I do it very often and my SO seems to enjoy it It's a sweet and nice way to express what we feel inside even when we can't find the right words to write down! If you're good at singing, you might also want to sing to him. Another thing I do to cheer my boyfriend up, is bring up some memories from when we were still getting to know each other and we usually laugh a lot about them because I always pick up the funny ones - for instance, he couldn't speak English at all when we first started to talk and it was very funny to hear him mispronounce some words or just see him nodding and smiling when I was asking a question. I'm sure your boyfriend and you have very funny stories to remember too!! Small talks can do too and I know it might be hard not to talk about serious things when you don't get to talk with your SO a lot but sometimes "sweet nothing" does miracles for overthinkers and can at least help you both not to think too much about anything in particular You could also try to soothe his mind by sending funny videos or pull silly jokes That's all I do really but just remember to be yourself and go with the flow! I'm sure you will come out with better ideas at the right time!

Wish you and your SO the best of luck,
take good care xx

[hmrambling]

Sure. Ask, "what can I do to help?"

So many times people get in the business of overhelping and determining for the other person what we can do to help the other person. Why not give the other person a chance to say what we can do to help. Ask, "what can I do to help?" and see what your partner says.