Break up...

[janexoxoangel]

So my bf and I have been together for nearly 3 years. We were in a long distance relationship last year for 8 months and closed the distance. I cant say it wasnt hard but we got through it. so we were together in person for about another 8 months and i had to go to the states. its been 4 months and we havent really been fighting.. ive been finding myself more here and think that it was easier than the first time around but then we had one little fight earlier this week and he messaged me saying he wanted to break up. he wanted to let me explore more let me see the world without having anything holding me backand hit a pause on our relationship so that we could save that for the future. I dont understand. I dont really want to break up because i love talking to him. sometimes being in an ldr situation can be a chore but I love him more than anything... what can I do. In a way i understands what he wants me to do and all but i just dont know how. Ive been happy despite being away from him he thinks ive been stressing about him back there too much but i just dont get it...

[Keelah]

Well, are you sure you don't feel like he described? very very sure?
If you are, maybe he's pushing his desires onto you. Maybe he's the one that wants to explore more, see the world and set your LDR to a pause and just can't bring himself to be honest about it.

I'd talk more with him before he can decide everything that's going to happen. If you feel that's wrong, if you (like you said) love talking to him, being with him and are happy even if away from him I don't see why he should assume you don't.

[sasad]

Maybe it was words spoken in your argument? Or maybe that us how he feels and he is pushing it back on you? I would talk to him and get clarification.. See what he really feels etc. Unfortunalety, "breaks" tend to be permanent in s lot of situations. And if that is what he truly wants, then you need respect that.. I hope it all works out

[Sparkling72]

Maybe that is his way of letting you down easy? Perhaps he also wants to explore things with no strings attached? these things are never easy, but if he is determined to break up, then accept it and move on.

[Loveyoumore]

Hang in there.

[Ellie luong]

i have the same problerm with you Janex , i hope your relationship going well now.

[Chris516]

So my bf and I have been together for nearly 3 years. We were in a long distance relationship last year for 8 months and closed the distance. I cant say it wasn't hard but we got through it. so we were together in person for about another 8 months and i had to go to the states. its been 4 months and we haven't really been fighting.. I've been finding myself more here and think that it was easier than the first time around but then we had one little fight earlier this week and he messaged me saying he wanted to break up. he wanted to let me explore more let me see the world without having anything holding me back and hit a pause on our relationship so that we could save that for the future. I don't understand. I don't really want to break up because i love talking to him. sometimes being in an ldr situation can be a chore but I love him more than anything... what can I do. In a way i understands what he wants me to do and all but i just don't know how. I've been happy despite being away from him he thinks I've been stressing about him back there too much but i just don't get it...

Where did his 'explore the world' guilt suddenly come from? He sounds like he has a lot of insecurity and lack of trust regarding the relationship. Not because of anything you did(or didn't) do.