How to let my parents fly my boyfriend over for the first time?

[sarahendipity]

My boyfriend and I are nevermets (Me being 19 from the USA, him being 17 from Germany) and we have been together for 4 months now. After he graduates from school in a couple years he's going to move to the US on a scholarship to finish school and pursue his career here and we'll get to close the distance for good (He's had this plan long before we met so that's why it was a lot easier for us to get into and LDR knowing it'd have an expiration date).

So, anyway back to the question...we are very close to knowing 100% that we can meet this year during Christmas break when we're out of school. We got the okay from his parents (who were nice enough to give him a little extra money to spend while he's here) and my mom is okay with it...the problem is my dad. He's very old school and doesn't understand how anyone could meet online and be in a relationship having never met in person. He's the last person we need the okay from to make this happen and I'm just not sure how to talk to him about it. He can be very hard to talk to. Both my parents have met my significant other through skype and I've brought him around my whole family multiple times. So they are familiar with him, and have had conversations with him.

My mom knows we're dating but I never really brought that up to my dad and every time my mom mentions that my boyfriend and I are dating or she refers to him as my boyfriend my dad will say things like "Dating? Who said they were dating...how can you date someone if you've never even been on a date. What, do you have online dates?" Just very sarcastic about it. How could I bring it up to him and ask him if it's alright for us to meet up and spend our break together without him blowing up over it? Any advice is appreciated.

[Chris516]

What about being a foreign exchange student? That is how my (ex)wife's step-sister met her husband. They have several kids now, and are happily married.

[talierose]

We had a bit of a similar problem. My mum was completely fine with it, but my boyfriend's mum was 100% against us meeting for the first time. His dad had his concerns but ultimately was for it. The problem wasn't the fact that it would be the first time meeting, but that his mum is very very religious, and she didn't agree with a single part of our relarionship and called it 'puppy love',
Buuut, after a few weeks of rigid convincing, my boyfriend made her see how important this is to him. I feel like having a sit down with your dad and explaining it to him, and being totally transparent, will give him a chance to consider it with more knowledge about it. I totally get your position and it's hard, but with time your dad will surely come around to the idea.
Good luck!

[C.C.]

There's only one way to do this. Sit down, have a lengthy conversation with him and explain everything as best as you can. Explain that you are responsible and what your boyfriend means to you. Also, that you'll take all the safety measures just in case.

AND, if you try your best to make it as diplomatic as possible and he still doesn't get/agree. Forget it. Meet him still. You are an adult already and this is your life. It's all about keeping balance between keeping your parents updated about your life and not hiding things from them vs acting the way you find best for yourself (after listening to their advice as well) and not letting them control your life too much.