I'm losing my gf because I cant go meet her yet

[chaku101]

So i was in ldr with my gf for 4 years and i hurt her and broke her heart. But i do love her very much and still talk. But she got tired of waiting for me and wants to move on and wants her space. I can't go meet her yet cs i don't make enough ( 2000$ ticket) and i am saving money to go meet her by 2020.
But she is losing her feelings for me. She started talking to some guy from pubg a week ago and she says she is falling in love with him already. That the guy cares for him and makes him feel loved. And she just told me today that he wants to meet her already (ticket costs only 50$ for him)
And she is freaking out that he is coming to meet so soon and that if something bad might happen.
what should i do ? I am just worried if the guy turns out to be nice and genuine id just lose her forever. And if the guy is just a player and just fucks her up, shed get hurt again. I need advise fast.

[Shauny]

If she wants to move on, it might be best for you to also move on, and delete all recollection you have of her.
If she's interested in some other guy and isn't thinking about you, it's a sign she's falling out of love. That being said, how old are you guys, because she's only known this guy a week. This 'love' she's falling for is nothing more than lust. She barely knows the guy. They could meet and never talk again, like how most dates end up. This is very immature.
In regards to the tickets costing $2000, that's a lot; where are you flying to and from? Have you tried skyscanner.net? Also, flights with stops are much cheaper and you could possibly find a return ticket for less than $1000. What about her meeting you?
Regardless, if she was bothered, she'd be trying to meet you at any cost, and she definitely wouldn't be bothered about some PUBG player. If she trusts a guy she barely knows, that's her own fault and I'd advise you to stay away from such a stupid, perhaps oblivious person.

[Atlantic Crossroads]

I am sorry that money is causing such a problem for you. Me and my SO can't afford to fly to each other either, and it is painful.
From having a quick look on skyscanner, prices start from 820$ up to 1742$, depending on where you are flying from and to. Which is still a lot of money, although not quite as bad as 2000$.
In terms of her moving on, that is her decision. You can advise her to be careful, but ultimately she will make her own choice either way. She can always tell him no. Sometimes we seem to forget that that is an option.

[chaku101]

hi thanks for reply
I dont want to move on. I hurt her and i want to fix what i did wrong. She stil accepted me after i hurt her and she is only fed up about me not being able to go meet her and satisfy her physically. This is what she told me til last week that itd all be okay once i am there with her.
however she started telling me last week after that she needs space for now, she will mess around but she will wait me till i come. shed like read my messages but not reply me. And in that she met that Pubg guy. and yesterday she tells me that she is falling for that guy cs he makes her laugh and happy. He calls her and cares for her.
Yes thats what im shocked too, 7 days ago she was only fed up of me not being there and tired of just texting me But here again she feels loved by yet another guy from another country who seems to care about her and wants to meet her already. She did tell me that her feelings might be just temporary and shed get hurt and come back to me. I talked to her that why is so doing that again with somebody over internet. She says that i broke her heart and that guy cares for her when she was feeling like shit. She says she has feelings for him and wants me to be just friends with him.
India to chile round trip costs 2000$ at cheapest. So that's the only option for me. She cant meet me since she doesnt work and has no money.
she is a very nice and kind human being she says she just wants to feel like she deserves ( since i hurt her ) and she says that the guy hasnt hurt her and takes care of her
Im tinking of doing no contact with her thinking maybe shed miss me. But i am also afraid that it d backfire and shed just get more mad at me. Since she is already not interested in talking to me !! IF she d just move on if i do no contact. What should i do ?

[chaku101]

I was okay with her moving on if she decided to go out, meet real people and date them. i'd be much happy for her. But she is doing it again, texting and calling some guy over internet. Earlier she told me that her ex before me was also long distance and hurt her too and they only talked for a month. But now she tells me that she was with her for 2 fucking years. and she was with me for 4 years. She was loyal and faithful to me in our relationship. She is not a cheater. I just took her for granted lied to her ( cs it was just online and i never took it seriously before ) and hurt her. Now she is again falling in love from an online guy from another country and its most likely that shed get hurt again since its only been a week and its not like guy would just start loving her. He d just play with her and leave her again. Theres lot of scope for lying and hurting in online relationship.. This is what i did too. But now i dont want her to get hurt, I realise my mistake and i want to make up to her. Go there settle with her and make her happy. I want to correct my mistakes. But she just doesnt care about me anymore

[Rezie]

This is going to sound very rude, but there is way too much drama for a relationship where two people haven't met. I'm not sure I'd stay in a relationship for that long without meeting, but coming up with the casah is not your problem. She is a serial online dater. I don't think she has an intention to meet any of her "boyfriends" (I know there are a lot of nevermets, but based on this message this doesn't really seem like a relationship). She is getting sometype of kick out of it. I'd seriously just move on. This relatiobship is not going anywhere.

[chaku101]

No i know why she only finds people online. Its cs of her insecurities . She is short and she just can't find any guy there. She wont tell it but i know this is the same reason she only finds people through internet. She is not a bad person. She is the most humble and responsible girl i ever know. Anyone living with her would be happy.
She was always so honest and loyal in our relationship. And i hurt her. Shed have tried everything to make it work, if i only i didn't hurt her. Due to my own insecurities, because of my looks, I lied to her and talked to her fake pictures of my best friend. I just broke her world apart. I always thought shed never accept my true face so i kept lying to her. She wanted to know me more ( through phone, video or whatever ) but since it wasn't real me i just kept lying to her and kept telling her to wait. Her love was true and she patiently kept waiting for me. But i couldn't tell her the truth thinking it's break her heart. But when i finally realised it doesn't matter what do i look like ans shed love me no matter what. I told her the truth and she shockingly just accepted me!! no other girl would. Since im short too she was in fact more happy about my real face. However I still can't go meet her yet. And she waited for me 4 years. And she isn't willing to wait anymore. Her love started to fade and she has started liking someone else. I just don't want to give up on our relationship because we both share same problems somehow and shed keep getting hurt because of her insecurities. But i understand her I want to make up for mistake. I want to be the best version of myself go there and protect her let go of her insecurities and make her happy. IF i just didn't hurt her, shed gladly wait for me to make this work. But now she has given up and only thinks of the negative.

[chronos]

This is kind of a waste of time for both of you. If you can't afford to see her it's not going to work out. I know your saving up but it's taking too long and then what about afterwards? How are you guys going to see each other again?

Also you guys haven't met in real life so you don't know how it's going to feel physically. It doesn't feel the same over Skype compared to being in person.

Just seems like a huge waste of time. I don't want to sugar-coat it. I would want someone to tell me how it is.

[pizza_heart]

No i know why she only finds people online. Its cs of her insecurities . She is short and she just can't find any guy there. She wont tell it but i know this is the same reason she only finds people through internet. She is not a bad person. She is the most humble and responsible girl i ever know. Anyone living with her would be happy.
She was always so honest and loyal in our relationship. And i hurt her. Shed have tried everything to make it work, if i only i didn't hurt her. Due to my own insecurities, because of my looks, I lied to her and talked to her fake pictures of my best friend. I just broke her world apart. I always thought shed never accept my true face so i kept lying to her. She wanted to know me more ( through phone, video or whatever ) but since it wasn't real me i just kept lying to her and kept telling her to wait. Her love was true and she patiently kept waiting for me. But i couldn't tell her the truth thinking it's break her heart. But when i finally realised it doesn't matter what do i look like ans shed love me no matter what. I told her the truth and she shockingly just accepted me!! no other girl would. Since im short too she was in fact more happy about my real face. However I still can't go meet her yet. And she waited for me 4 years. And she isn't willing to wait anymore. Her love started to fade and she has started liking someone else. I just don't want to give up on our relationship because we both share same problems somehow and shed keep getting hurt because of her insecurities. But i understand her I want to make up for mistake. I want to be the best version of myself go there and protect her let go of her insecurities and make her happy. IF i just didn't hurt her, shed gladly wait for me to make this work. But now she has given up and only thinks of the negative.

insecurity because she is short?! There are millions of short latin americans, including Chileans, damn Snooki is Chilean and is shorter than a thumbtack. She sounds like she is trying to find excuses so you get tired of her and move on. You, on the other hand, catfished her. I'm sorry but I don't see this working any way you put it.

[Ejoriah]

If her feelings for you aren't there anymore there's really nothing you can do. A relationship is two people and it's not healthy for you to be one-sided in holding on to her.

I also agree with the other posters. There's a lot of drama and things that would make me wary of continuing a relationship. Four years without meeting is a really long time.