Canada and Cuba

[lizzybear33]

Hi, I am looking for some answers or advice. I met a man in June 2019 in Cuba. Immediate sparks and chemistry was insane. I have never felt like this for someone ever in my life and I am in my late 20s. He says all the right things to be honest. But I am unsure of what he tells me is the truth. About himself and his life it's been such a short time. He does not want to move to Canada he wants me to move to Cuba. He is currently doing construction on his house and turning it into a bed and breakfast basically which will net him a lot of money especially for a Cuban. I guess my question is how do you all cope with the distance ? I'm having serious trouble right now because I don't have any plans for another trip and I feel like I may lose him or he will lose me. It's hard without sex but I also wonder if he can even be celebet? Is that even a fair thing to ask of someone? I feel it is not.

I have heard horror stories of people attempting to get visas or come to Canada or anywhere else. A few girls at my workplace have had this happen and I worry that he doesnt feel the same as I do.

Please any insight is appreciated

[Junglebook]

Heey you, I can not give any advice on the visa thing but I feel you on the losing part.
This week I felt so insecure all of a sudden. I was so scared that my bf would fall out of love. I knew that I had no reason to feel that way, cause he is absolutely the sweetest. The way he texts, the things he tells people about me. He told his sister last week that I will move in with him after my study and that he is super excited about it. But sometimes insecurity kicks in.
I told him about it and I told him that it had nothing to do with the things he does or says. We talked about it for like 2 hours. He calmed me down, he reassured me that everything is fine and he even asked if there was anything he could do to help me dealing with this. He refused to stop talking about until my mind was at ease.
Just to be open about my feelings and the conversation we had helped me a lot.

I think it’s absolutely fair to ask someone to wait for you and not have sex with anyone else.
If he really loves you he’ll do that for you.
If that doesn’t seem fair to you, you can just open up the conversation about it and ask him how he feels about it.
I have a friend in LDR as well and she and boyfriend decided that they can have casual sex with someone else, as long as the tell each other about it.
I am not saying that you should do the same but there are many ways to deal with this.

And what helps me to deal with the distance is to have next visit planned.
So I can start counting down on the day I am back home again.
And it helps me that I know it will “only” take two years until I finally emigrate.

I wish you all the best in your LDR!