I'm from the US and he's from Japan

[siren724]

I've been talking to my SO for a little over a year and lately have been wanting to take the relationship further. he's 27 and I'm 28. I just don't know how to break the news to my family since they're either the types that don't believe LDRs are real relationships or they get paranoid and think everyone online is either a catfish or psycho. how can I break the news without them freaking out? please give me advice because keeping this in feels like it's burning within me and I don't want to live without him either, I couldn't imagine and I do want to meet him for the first time soon

[Redheart14]

I think you need to be honest here. I know it’ll be hard but I’m sure it’ll make things easier. If you’ve met before you could say you’ve already met and that might put them more at ease. Looking at your age, you are old enough to make your own decisions so if you can assure them you’re happy and safe (he’s real, not a scammer) it should be ok. You could even FaceTime him and then they can see him and virtually meet him.

[siren724]

we haven't met yet. we've sent videos and pics to each other and want to start face timing soon. it's just they're very overprotective and that's what sucks at times

[MsGrim]

I can see the parent aspect of this, honestly, but being in a LDR myself I also see where you are coming from. They are just wanting to protect you- it is their job, after all! This is about you and your SO though, so don't let them hold you back from being with him or making it work. Explain to them what is going on, let them know you are capable of making sound decisions and that this is what you want.

Having a good conversation with you family and laying it all out there might give them a better understanding of the situation.

[siren724]

it's the finding the right moment to tell them which is the problem that I'm having too. like bringing the subject up

[Redheart14]

Sometimes you just need to make the moment to tell them. I just said “Oh by the way, I’m kinda seeing someone. It’s long distance, it’s early days, I’m not sure how it’ll go but I just wanted you to know”. Of course they had questions, but until I knew where it was going I couldn’t tell them much. By toning it down and not making it a huge deal they were great with it. As things progressed, I mentioned him more and he eventually met them. We have closed the distance and are married so it obviously went ok. I remember just feeling so great when I could get up and text him and my family would say “talking to him?” Or “Say hi to him”. I’d even FaceTime some nights and show him my family. Hopefully your family will be ok with it.

[TaraMarie]

I have a 29 yr old daughter. Although I would be concerened for her, there isn't a damn thing I can do. You're an adult. Whats the worst that will happen?

[siren724]

Right now I'm studying Japanese more fluently so I can make it easier for my bf to communicate with my family and I'm helping him with English as well, but anyways, I think my dad is probably the more accepting and reasonable one, so I'm thinking on how to tell him first

[Redheart14]

Let us know how it goes

[siren724]

well sadly it didn't last with him, but I am glad it didn't. I have finally met the love of my life, once again it's long distance and he's from Nepal and he's amazing, makes me feel special, wanted, even just seen unlike most and he is the one and has asked me to marry him (though I told him I do want an in person proposal when we do meet, which he said of course lol) so yeah even though things didn't go through with the other guy, I am now in a happy relationship and engaged

[Angella_white]

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