Coronavirus Struggles!!

[Melany]

Hi guys! This is my first post!

I joined this forum because the pandemic had been doing quite a job on me! My boyfriend is in Europe and I am in the USA. We had planned no a visit in early April, but we had to cancel it because of the US travel ban Since then we’ve tried twice to arrange another meeting and none of them worked. I miss him so so much! We’ve been together for a year and four months, and nine of those months have been long distance.

How has the pandemic screwed up your plans? Did you also have any trips that were cancelled?

Stay safe and healthy!

[Lostviolinist]

There are probably a lot of people on this boat. My wife is in China with my son. I'm stuck in the States. I'm expecting this to continue on and off until summer of 2021. My son turns 2 soon. I'll have to bear seeing his celebration through photos again. As much as I want to see them, there is literally nothing I can do. My wife cannot enter the States so we are doomed to spend this entire period apart. I regret making plans for March and not taking vacation to visit in December. I had held off because I wanted to wait for about 6 months of separation before I went since I cannot travel abroad too often within a short time. I've even wondered if I really made the right choice when I gave in to immigration and sent them back. I didn't wan't to risk her being detained by ICE, but some people fight them with all their effort and win. I get quite bitter when I see an article of someone successfully winning a case against immigration and staying. Some judge can choose to protect someone because they are "tearing families apart" yet here I am with my family gone because I accepted my mistake and followed the law.

[Ranidae]

Hi there, I feel for you both :/
Same situation here: visit in April has been cancelled and we can't reschedule the trip yet...

All I can say is use all the tricks in the LDR Playbook to keep the bond as strong as you can:
* regular videochats,
* shared Netflix accounts,
* online games where your characters can play together,
* letters and care packages...

It's especially important if you have young children: even just through Skype, I've seen kids develop a bond early on! One of my friends' child, also 2 years old, remembered me thanks to a gift I had sent her

Keep on making plans too, because it's uplifting and helps you stay focused on the end goal -- closing the distance.

Stay strong, and stay connected guys! We're all in this together

[snow]

Hi guys! This is my first post!

I joined this forum because the pandemic had been doing quite a job on me! My boyfriend is in Europe and I am in the USA. We had planned no a visit in early April, but we had to cancel it because of the US travel ban Since then we’ve tried twice to arrange another meeting and none of them worked. I miss him so so much! We’ve been together for a year and four months, and nine of those months have been long distance.

How has the pandemic screwed up your plans? Did you also have any trips that were cancelled?

Stay safe and healthy!

This is the first time we're dealing with something like this. I can't even imagine what it's like not to be able to see your SO for an undetermined time.

The only thing I can kinda relate it to is not being able to visit my family after moving to close the distance with my SO. I am now planning to visit them next year for now and I try to call more often.

Stay positive, communicate and meme a lot ♥

[laniii]

I’m in Australia, my partner is in US. My last trip to see him was last month, I look at it as being lucky cause a few days after I flew back home they travel bans started.

It sucks cause we planned it out we’d see each other no longer than 3 months apart at a time and now with Australia having the borders closed it could be several months or more. Sucks more not having a date to look forward to. I have a trip booked for June but keeping that flight in hope of things changing.

Trying to look at the positive side right now, save money for our future. I found this forum in hopes I could relate to someone too cause it sucks when people don’t understand.

[tokyo blues]

Postponing plans sucks a lot. My boyfriend was convinced to ask my hand for marriage and finally closing the distance, he was coming in may for that. I have been looking forward to May since December. I think most LFAD had to postpone all plans and had to prove themselves a lot of patience. And worst case scenario is that people don't understand d and tell you " you just need more patience". If my friends tell me to be patient one more time I think imma cry.
Not to generalize but having LDR makes you the queen/ king of patience and inpatient at the same time. You get to be pretty lucky that you have the means to visit often. Added to that having the ticket will assure that the SO who's traveling will get there at some point(sooner than later) and yes that's can be a lot more torturing. But feel lucky that you have something, a date to look up to. In my personal case I don't and OMG I wish we would not procrastinate so much with tickets so we would a have "guarantee" of a next date.

[kathyc]

COVID - my first post

Hi Melanie. I am in the same boat. I’m in California and my boyfriend is in France. We’ve been together a year and 3 months. Seen each other 25% of the time, which I think is excellent. I had a flight for May 14 that has been canceled. President Macron said he thinks they’ll be keeping the borders in France closed until September. We’ve not gone more than 2 1/2 months between visits. So while I’m totally ok with sheltering in, i am having a rough time knowing I can’t be with him for 4 or 5 more months.

We talk everyday on messenger video. But I can’t even send him mail! France isn’t sorting international mail! So I’m getting together a box of homemade cards, love letters and other stuff to send via DHL. Très expensive! Lol!

What all should I put in my box? I have to keep it small and light. It’s literally like 10X as expensive as regular mail.

XOXO for everyone having to sacrifice seeing their sweeties right now.
Kathy

Hi guys! This is my first post!

I joined this forum because the pandemic had been doing quite a job on me! My boyfriend is in Europe and I am in the USA. We had planned no a visit in early April, but we had to cancel it because of the US travel ban Since then we’ve tried twice to arrange another meeting and none of them worked. I miss him so so much! We’ve been together for a year and four months, and nine of those months have been long distance.

How has the pandemic screwed up your plans? Did you also have any trips that were cancelled?

Stay safe and healthy!

[alyssa.pallotti1]

Hi there! Very similar here. My boyfriend is in England, and I'm in Texas. We met working together and have been together long distance for a year and 4 months too! We saw each other for the New Year in January and had a trip booked in April but had to cancel as well due to travel bans. I'm absolutely gutted as we were really making it work and seeing each other 5-6 times a year and suddenly it's open ended. It's so so scary. I'm happy to talk and be there for support because I feel so alone and don't have anyone around in my circle who can relate to these nerves and this situation!

[alyssa.pallotti1]

It's the open endedness that's killing me! My boyfriend is in the UK, I'm in Texas, so can definitely relate. Had to cancel our March trip due to travel bans being implemented just 1.5 weeks before his flight. Here to talk for sure if you need it!

[kathyc]

Crazy that there are so many of us doing this US/transoceanic relationships. My boyfriend came out for a month and left on March 17, just as the bans were starting, so we were very lucky to have a long wonderful time together. But yes, the not knowing when is the toughest thing. Yesterday we spent 5 hours on messenger video, talking and having drinks and ended up doing something on our video call we’d never done before (mix a Scorpio with a few gin and tonics... lol!) So finding something new to do together, even when you’re apart, is wonderful, exciting and feels like we’re still adding to the relationship and not just maintaining. But the rare days I’m sad, I just know I’d rather be with him in this capacity than without him, so there’s never even a thought to not just push through to our next visit. i think having full happy lives and lots of friends helps, too. (Except when there’s a stay home order and we can’t work or see our friends.) I am really glad to know I’m not alone - that you guys are out there and understand. Thank!

[glasspaper]

I've been trying to distract myself with study and work a lot. But today it hits me. I miss my SO so much.
He visited me and left last month just few days before the whole Pandemic thing got all crazy.
We're planning our marriage and about to file for the K1 soon but with this whole global crisis and resctrictions, we even don't know when are we able to see each other again.
I'm trying to keep positive and just think about what to do when this all over. It's not easy.
All we wanted was to be able to close the distance after 8 years of LDR, but now this

[Angel]

Well, this has been so diffucult to me. I started using all these apps to kill time and boredom and you know it really helped. It's interesting how we all are in the same boat, I've been using tests of Worldofforecasts - has also helped me to check all this new people. I admire how now online communication is the main one. But having it like this forever is a nightmare. Thank God we are all social creatures.

[alyssa.pallotti1]

In this together!

It is comforting to see so many people are in the same boat, though I wish none of were! So lucky you squeezed in the time before March 17, we just narrowly missed it and had to cancel our late March visit. Keep wishing we could have foreseen this somehow and booked an earlier date--but how could we have known? I feel it wasn't really reported on properly until March anyway. It's super tough, but like you said, I'm thankful for the distraction of work and videochatting with him/friends/etc. I definitely think we'll make it through and come out stronger, but having managed every 2 months to now god only knows when is constantly weighing on me. But all we can do is wait really.

Crazy that there are so many of us doing this US/transoceanic relationships. My boyfriend came out for a month and left on March 17, just as the bans were starting, so we were very lucky to have a long wonderful time together. But yes, the not knowing when is the toughest thing. Yesterday we spent 5 hours on messenger video, talking and having drinks and ended up doing something on our video call we’d never done before (mix a Scorpio with a few gin and tonics... lol!) So finding something new to do together, even when you’re apart, is wonderful, exciting and feels like we’re still adding to the relationship and not just maintaining. But the rare days I’m sad, I just know I’d rather be with him in this capacity than without him, so there’s never even a thought to not just push through to our next visit. i think having full happy lives and lots of friends helps, too. (Except when there’s a stay home order and we can’t work or see our friends.) I am really glad to know I’m not alone - that you guys are out there and understand. Thank!

[kathyc]

Grass is always greener

I must say, you are very lucky that you are planning to close the distance. You have that to look forward to, which is just a matter of time. This separation is temporary. Your life with your partner is going to be for a long time and, someday, this will just be a story you tell people when you are old. Remember how lucky you are to have each other. That’s all that matters.

I've been trying to distract myself with study and work a lot. But today it hits me. I miss my SO so much.
He visited me and left last month just few days before the whole Pandemic thing got all crazy.
We're planning our marriage and about to file for the K1 soon but with this whole global crisis and resctrictions, we even don't know when are we able to see each other again.
I'm trying to keep positive and just think about what to do when this all over. It's not easy.
All we wanted was to be able to close the distance after 8 years of LDR, but now this

[Hopeful1]

So glad I found this site and I am not alone!! This is distance feels neverending thanks to Corona The last time I saw my husband was for New Year's Day. I live in the Caribbean and he lives in the US. We have a 2 year old daughter together and have been long distance since 2015. Married for 2 years.

Our next visit was supposed to be in May for my birthday. We didn't buy the tickets yet but we were making plans of all the fun things we'd do. He was planning on putting through the paperwork this year so we could all be together permanently, but then this virus happened and suddenly I'm not sure anymore. The uncertainty is unnerving. I'm glad to have our daughter with me but I'm lonely most days and I miss him very much.