LDR in CoviD

[Domi]

I constantly fear that the long time apart will kill our relationship. I love him so much and I know he does love me but ww have been having issues with communicating all emotions online and it s like we drifting apart.
We ve been together 1year 5months, moved in together after 3 months of dating. It was amazing, I felt so safe and cared about. We were so in love. After 7 months of being together we had to go LDR for 5 months because of my work abroad. We spent together 2 weeks after I came back and then had to go for another work experience abroad and then covid hit and now we ve been apart almost 5 months. There s really no perspective of seeing each other cause things are again bad in his country and it s not safe to travel, probably soon borders will get close again. Anyway, we talk every day but I feel like that is not enough and I just find in how many ways we are so different and starting to have doubts about our future. I dont want to break up but those fears make me feel so depressed and hopeless.
How to help our relationship? Any advice?
How are you affected by the pandemic?

[MsGrim]

You have to lean on each other for support during all of this uncertainty. Have a talk about this with him and let him know how you are feeling.. Sometimes those words of affirmation from your SO is all you need to keep going. You have to remain positive and just keep in the back of your mind that this is not going to last forever, even though it may seem like it will with all of the extended travel bans.

[aussiegirl]

I constantly fear that the long time apart will kill our relationship. I love him so much and I know he does love me but ww have been having issues with communicating all emotions online and it s like we drifting apart.
We ve been together 1year 5months, moved in together after 3 months of dating. It was amazing, I felt so safe and cared about. We were so in love. After 7 months of being together we had to go LDR for 5 months because of my work abroad. We spent together 2 weeks after I came back and then had to go for another work experience abroad and then covid hit and now we ve been apart almost 5 months. There s really no perspective of seeing each other cause things are again bad in his country and it s not safe to travel, probably soon borders will get close again. Anyway, we talk every day but I feel like that is not enough and I just find in how many ways we are so different and starting to have doubts about our future. I dont want to break up but those fears make me feel so depressed and hopeless.
How to help our relationship? Any advice?
How are you affected by the pandemic?

I'm feeling the exact same way lately. In October it will be a year since I saw my SO was meant t o see him in May but I'm in Australia he is in America. Aus has put a complete travel ban on everyone it's crazy. I have people in my ear telling me to leave him but you know what? I think people truly overestimate their chances of finding real love. My relationships before him were with guys I saw everyday, and I felt completely alone and unloved. Not even once have I doubted my man loves me or wants me. I cannot fathom my life nor my future without him.

Can you picture that? Your future without your guy? Only you know how you feel. I know obstacles can be overcome, time is fleeting and this period isn't forever. There are ldr couples that get married and spend their lives together after enduring distance between them. If he is your person, he is your person. Couples go through all sorts of insane things, a spouse might get cancer, they might go broke etc. For me I look at this as our challenge right now, but it shows me how much we really love each other.

That being said I focus on being grateful now instead of upset. I'm grateful he is safe and healthy, that I'm safe and healthy. So many have lost their partners to the virus 😥

[sagnikdutta]

How I see it is that it is normal to fear or lose a clear vision of a future together. But nobody other than ourselves know about each other. I too am in a similar situation as in India we are still in quarantine but whenever I find myself in an uncertain situation, I talk to my partner. what is best about LDR is that our love cannot be labelled as lust so there is a lot of understanding and patience. I think you should just talk about your feelings with your partner. Ofcourse nobody is perfect. Partners turn out to be a little different than we expected but that is where acceptance comes in. We just have to accept each other's differences, try to grow with them and make them grow with us too.

[Enric]

I have a similar fear...

Our relationship was already very difficult from the start, but Covid-19 is only a bonus to a long list of challenges. We don't have any sort of couple crisis but the whole situation is depressing and frustrating. Mostly because I can't see an end to this.

[shell212]

I am in this situation but my other seems to be giving up. He rated his excitment for me as a 3, 3 months ago it was a 7, and 6 months ago it was a 10. We are now 9+ months apart. I think if you have an end goal in being together that helps focus on that. I got downgraded to a 3 becuse the virus also killed our plans to close the distance. Now we are left with an uncertain maybe. But if you have a goal to be together focus on that. It's what kept us going.

Even despite the toll of time we keep talking and the only thing that keeps us going is well for us now just a posibility of being reunited :-(

It's hard. I understand you pain. Try not to focus so much on the negative or it will spill out. Enjoy that you still have each other. I think long as you have a plan at the end it will be fine. I'm in the bad situation where we don't have a set in stone plan anymore. This can't last forever.

My grandparents were long distance when he got drafted into world war II. They didn't even have the luxry of the internet. They were seperated for four years and i'm sure it felt like forever. If the love is true then the love will prevail.

[D_M]

Yes it is very hard with the uncertainty around border and travel because of Covid.
I reall like what Aussiegirls said that: I think people truly overestimate their chances of finding real love.
This is the thing for me. I am totally blown away by my SO and the connection we feel for each other. The distance is awful but the relationship is the best and I can seriously see us being together for the rest of our lives, so it is all worth it. Covid will end, we'll all be reunited with our SOs and, if it works out, we'll have long and happy lives together and be thankful that we kept the faith during covid times.

[mikaelaj]

Hey, I’m Australian and my boyfriend is American aswell! It’s the worst not being able to leave at all to see them

[Hannah93]

Hi dear!

I would like to answer for your question so I have an Australian boyfriend and our relationship is really affected by Covid I didn’t see him since March and I think due to the distance and uncertainty we are dying. I gave him support, I listened to him, in the beginning months LDR WAS EXCITING! but he’s just not that interested in keeping in touch I’m not saying he doesn’t like me or love me anymore but for sure he doesn’t care.

I am in the same situation like you, we talk every day - but 2 months ago he just changed, less and less effort what he gave - are really different although I never had doubts that I want him or not, but apparently I wasn’t enough and since a couple of days we cut off talking and he didn’t reach out to me so I guess time heals everything.

Keep up your positivity! I wasn’t and now I feel empty.

Good luck and take care !

H