Going to Australia ?!

[Hannah93]

Well hello here I am again and I just feel like I need to get off this from my chest. Some of you might remember my story with the Australian guy, the confused man who broke up with me then went nine months with no contact ! and then being reconnected las June , talked 6 months again in the meantime I applied for my work and holiday visa to Australia, which got accepted this March ! So wohoooo I am going to Australia to meet my partner ! After 2 years But NO ! Because I broke up with him at the end of January , because I had enough from his promises.
now I am totally torn ! Should I go take the change or sit home. I don’t know what to do. I texted him this Saturday to ask some infos where to go what to do but he was just really informative and that’s it ( I need to mention we didn’t talk since the breakup , 2,5 month ) I am really sad and still romanticizing him .. I don’t know if I should cross the ocean and live in a place where no one is waiting for me .. but we had soooo many dreams together ..

[OhioJim]

My guess would be to not go.

[Lausss]

What you should ask yourself is if he is the only reason why you are moving.
Maybe it started because you wanted to move in with him, but now you can explore a new life in Australia without him. If you feel like you can be happy without him there, then you should go, have a new life adventure and if you don't like it you can always go back to your country.
However, if he's the main reason you are still going, hoping you would go back together and if that doesn't happen you'd be devastated and not enjoying your time there, stay in your country.
He made it clear he isn't that interested, you shouldn't be crossing the planet just for him, you should do it for yourself.

[Anna]

He broke up with you, you broke up with him - don't go.

[Hannah93]

Yes, but I do agree with Lausss, this jussi guy was never certain, all the time confused. If I go I should go bcs I want it. I am in a huge oxymoron here : I want to go bcs of him but also I don't want to go bcs of him, being in a same country. Well Australia is huge, and what if I found the love of my life...

[Anna]

Why did you broke up? Does he even want to meet you? Why couldn't he visit your country?

[OhioJim]

.... I am in a huge oxymoron here : I want to go bcs of him but also I don't want to go bcs of him,....

As the old saying goes: "If you can't live without him and you can't live with him, you are better off without him."

[Hannah93]

I never heard this saying, but thank you Ohio Jim!
well first in 2020 November we broke up bcs of him, being fed up with long distance and not knowing when we meet due to Covid.
in this January I did the break up , Bcs of a silly argument we had, but he was promising a lot to meet me and come to visit but never happened, they were just words. Lately he only promised a lot of things but never happened… and in the whole month of Jan I wanted to end this .. but again I have mixed feeling regarding ♀️.

is with or without him I guess I feel the same ..

[Anna]

Do you really believe that love of your life promises a lot and never keep their word?

The most important question: does he want you to visit him?

[Hannah93]

I did not ask him about that, I only told him that I will go to Aus and use my working visa and he just wrote me an informative novel and that’s it . In any case he told me if I need help he will help me.

And for your first phrase no, he is not the love of my life, it’s just 3 y I was wishing to live with him in Aus, so is kind of hard to get out from y head..

[Anna]

So would you like to go just for yourself to work and travel and by the way meet him just for closure?

[Hannah93]

I Will definitely go to Australia.
Meeting him not sure. I ‘ve been thinking of him and the whole situation. Is he still cares of me? Well he hasn’t been contacting me . 2weeks ago I texted him and that was it. This is definitely gone…

[D_M]

Personally, if there is any hope, then I would visit him.
Maybe, without covid and meeting in person, everything you felt before can flourish again. Then great.
Or maybe not, but then at least as Anna said, you get closure and can move on. Literally, just move on. you have a great country to explore so if there is nothin left in the relationship, go to Sydney, or Melbourne or Perth or Tassie or.... you get the idea.
I think if you meet him and it's not right, you'll find it much easier to move on without regret. It may hurt but you'll be stronger for it. And if it suddenly becomes like it started, then maybe stick around for a while and see how it goes.
Good luck, whatever you decide.

[Hannah93]

D_M Thanks a lot for your reply ! And you are totally right!! I had the same idea And that’s what happened :
I have my flight to Perth next week, and I asked him 3 weeks ago if there is any hope that we could meet and talk through and his reply was that our love story ended but if I need help or guidance I can ask him. I don’t want to meet him, unless I I bump into him as a miracle.
I am just about to let go of it. I mean I am in the “ right “ path and I am super nervous and excited about Oz :S

[D_M]

Hi Hannah93, that's a tough text to get but it gives you a clear answer. Perth is a great city. I love Fremantle and WA is awesome, there's some amazing diving etc. Have a great time and enjoy your trip!!