Trust issues about sleep

[moniepanda13]

Hi. I need an advice to all my lesbian people who are in a LDR relationship. My girlfriend, (soon to be) because she didn't answer me yet. We fought last night because I fell like 3 mins asleep in our convo. Then I read all of her messages that she will give up on me. Actually, i have done this so many times. I just accidentally fell asleep. Then, she felt that i was cheating on here, telling lies about to her, and she keeps on saying that i never change. Know, i kept on calling her but she didnt pick up my calls. Please how can i fix this? Thank you

[Littlewhiteflower]

I'm not lesbian, but i am in a LDR. She obviously has severe trust issues and you are not even dating yet. Imagine how it will be when you are dating. It is not going to improve if she does not seek help. It is not your fault if you fell asleep.

[5518MilesApart]

I have to agree with Littlewhiteflower.

To reiterate, this sounds like severe trust issues with someone you aren't even exclusive with yet.
In my personal experience, I've had trust issues, and starting out my LDR was extremely difficult because of it...
She needs to recognize that she is a person with a problem. You need sleep. There is nothing wrong with falling asleep in the middle of a conversation.

[kittyxuchiha11]

As the others have said, she definitely has trust issues and being able to get over that with her will be tough, but some advice on what you can do. We've all fallen asleep on our partners, and yes it can be incredibly annoying and even anxiety inducing if it is just over text and we have no idea where they've gone.

With my SO there have been several times where she's been at work and then hasn't texted me to say she's home because she's gotten in and just fallen straight asleep. I used to really worry at the beginning that something was wrong and although i didn't voice my concerns that she was cheating or something, of course it crossed my mind. when someone you're talking to just suddenly stops responding of course you're going to worry, and if you don't know the person well enough yet (like how it seems she doesn't know you that well) you're going to jump to some crazy things, especially if you've ever been given a slight hint that that could be a reason (you've told her you had a crush on a friend once, you just have a really close friend, someone at work is also gay and flirts with you, ect.)

The best thing you can do to try help her with her jealousy and trust issues is tell her things you do so so she can have a routine to follow for things you do. Example, let her known what times you'll be at work so that's why you're not replying, if you have a special occasion you're going to and if you'll be able to talk there. The most important one is if you're felling tired just tell her that, there's nothing wrong with knowing its time to go to bed and she might be sad you have to go but it'll stop a misunderstanding. I too have been annoyed at my SO for suddenly not replying and logically i know it's because she's just fallen asleep but sometimes my brain can take me crazy places.

Best of luck and I ho it works out between you two

[dglynn77]

Don't even know what to advise. Try to beg for her forgiveness.

I’m sorry, but you think she should beg forgiveness for falling asleep?!
I’m all for apologizing, but I am not for being buried under the guilt of other people’s insecurity and trust issues. She fell asleep, not intentionally. I’ve been there many times being LDR with late night calls. If I had to beg forgiveness for falling asleep because my SO was an insecure asshat, I’d have stopped engaging in that relationship pretty darn fast.

[Chifuyu4]

I fall asleep when talking to my SO all the time, he doesn't mind and even finds it cute. If the same thing happens to me of course I'm fine too. TBH I could not be in a relationship with someone that paranoid and controlling. Might be a good sign to start moving on, OP!

[Shauny]

Seems like a gamble, but if you let her know you're interested in her, but her trust issues are letting your relationship down with her, she might lighten up. To reiterate; let her know you want her, without the trust issues.