Announcement

Collapse
No announcement yet.

LDR and mental health/ED

Collapse
X
 
  • Filter
  • Time
  • Show
Clear All
new posts

    LDR and mental health/ED

    Hi guys,

    my girlfriend and I have been in a relationship for almost 7 months now. It's been LDR since the very beginning. Everything between us is dreamy and we try to support each other as much as we can. We live 300 km apart, we're trying to see each other quite often as for LDR because usually it's every 2/3 weeks for a couple of days. At her home everyone knows we're dating, in my case my mom and my sister - also all of our friends. I came out to my mom before my girlfriend first came to visit me. We live in a very homophobic country and I honestly don't see myself coming out to my father. We managed to make things work for the past few months but in april I noticed that I'm in a worse mental state. I couldn't eat, I felt anxiety for a couple of days in a row. After that I had some good days, I didn't know why I feel that way. Then When we were together - everything was fine. When one of us had to go home - it was all back again. Because of covid situation I was barely working, so I had all the time in the world to overthink and I think it was one of the factors why I felt low. After I came back home after our date weekend at the beginning of may, I felt like a mess for a week. I couldn't even look at food and let me tell you, I love food and I absolutely love cooking. But after that things went back to normal for over a week, then we spend last weekend together, things were better. But on our last day together we both didn't have apetite, today is another day like that. Since april it was only me feeling that way but now it's both of us. I'm working in one city and she has uni even further away than these 300km but now she has online classes. I know distance will be even harder for us if I start to work full time & she has normal classes. We have plans to relocate and close the distance in 2 years when she gets her degree. Technically I could ask for a change of place at work and I know it's possible. But after these 2 years we wanna live in my city because I get very good money here and here's her dreamy uni for MA degree. But there's a very low chance I'll be able to go back here for work. I'm super torn and I don't know what to do now. If anyone has any advice, thanks in advance.

    #2
    Hi Lexa25,
    As many people will tell you here, anxiety seems to be a big part of LDR. I'm going through it now as many non-posters probably are too.
    From what you say, it sounds like you have a good connection and a big part of your reaction is you're missing her... which is a good thing.
    Getting to see each other every 3 weeks is really good. Try and focus on, and look forward to your next visit, count down the days, make plans etc.
    Where you both end up is up to you both and money isn't everything. I am planning to move to my SO's city as she has a lot of family there and I don't here. I earn much better money here but happiness is more important. And being with her makes me really happy. I would move now if my son wasn't still under 18 and living near... another story.
    I hope it works out for you both. Have faith and stay strong. Enjoy your time together and make use of your time apart.

    Comment

    Working...
    X