Army wife

[Danigirl08]

Well I'm not the usually army wife. I am the wife, that is in the army. I've had a long hard road I did first month at bct, got injured and sent home for a month. Than spent two months in a rehab unit and went to complete bct. I am now at ait and this has been hell on my marriage. We fight a lot because my husband is not te greatest at communication and here that's all we have. But none the less I love him more than anything. I will hopefully be station In the next month and home with him until deployment.

[ushiwakafox]

I'm not in the military, but I have a bit of military background. My dad has been in the AF for 24 years, and my SO is currently at basic right now. I can't imagine going through what you are and not having a supportive husband. I know this sounds dumb but have you had a chance to tell him how you're feeling? Tell him to put himself in your shoes, how would he feel if he was going through all this and not getting much support through communication. My SO also doesn't see, to quite understand the importance of communication in a LDR sometimes. It's not that he's doing it out of spite or doesn't care, he just doesn't think about it. He was raised in a family that does not typically share feelings or really communicate much at all with each other, so naturally he is lacking in that area. Maybe your SO is in the same boat. Try to explain clearly what you would like him to do. That might be all he needs, for you to tell him what you want him to do instead of expecting him to just know.

I'm sorry that was so long, I hope I was of some help to you. Good luck with what you're going through, thank you so much for your service.

[Danigirl08]

Oh thank you! It's funny you say that cause my husband also grew up in a house hold that didnt communicate much. It seems like men do not understand communication as well as women. There is a book that my mother got for us called love and respect. I read it first and highlighted things I thought were important ( so my husband knew what to pay attention to ) but you and your so should try it also. I think it can help. It would be harder for him to read it in training but hopefully once he gets to his job training he can read it

[brandonsArmygf]

I think u should watch army wives its actually very informing

[ushiwakafox]

That's a good idea, I was thinking about going to marriage counseling with my SO before we tie the knot. I've think it would be helpful to learn some more communication skills. I think we the skills we learned during our LDR is very helpful, but we didn't learn other vital skills that CDRs tend to have. Like we can't seem to calmly discuss a disagreement in person, but through texting we can work it out fairly well. But I don't want to have to so that. So I think you had the right idea to highlight things you feel are important.
I don't know, I may not need to do that after he graduates BMT, he mentioned on the phone to expect some changes. I don't know what that means so we'll see lol.
I hope you and your husband are able to talk things out a little smoother! I'm sure talk will.