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The not knowing when you will see them next...

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    #1

    The not knowing when you will see them next...

    So I know that many times advice that is given for people in LDRs is to keep goals in mind. One of those goals being... setting up the next time you will see one another, no matter how long it is from now it is a good way to keep your eyes on the prize...

    But what about for us in LDMilitaryRelationships?! My job allows me to have a good amount of time to travel but since there are many times where he can no be positive that he will be available/or even home at all for my visit that is not something I can count on.

    So, how do you all deal with that part? Do you know side step that "Adivce" all together, or does it still apply someway?

    Thanks!

    Met in July 2006
    Dated very briefly in November 2006
    Reconnected in July 2011
    Something changed in August 2013
    He visited in November 2013
    I traveled in November 2013
    I visit in February 2014
    Tags: None
    #2
    my SO isnt in the military but he lost his job i just found one again (and got some nice bills) we are trying hard to save up for a ticket but that is hard when you hardly have any lol
    but any way, we have no clue other then that we dont want to live without each other and that gives us the (frustrating) strenght to go on.
    but yes it is harder then hell not having a goal to look forward to then , some day.. and some days i cant hold it and yell and scream and cry my little heart out to prevent me from loosing my sanity, and keeping in mind that there are always people how have it even harder and the where there is a way there is a will.....
    although at the moment i would rather fight a bear do something fysical about but sadly i can't
    so do as everybody else do get up do your own thing and at night sit at the edge of your bed saying to yourself that is another day down and i survived it again up to the next
    good luck!

    Comment

      #3
      All you can do is plan when you'll be able to see each other if something does not come up. I'm in the military so when I think about when I want to take leave, it's on a "if I'm able to" thought process. You can have a general idea of when you'll be able to see each other just know that if military duties come up, then it could get cancelled. I think all LDRs are like that though; any unforeseen circumstance could keep a visit from happening or cause one to occur earlier or later than expected.
      Our love story:
      Attended the same high school 2004-2007
      Dated CD: June 2009-July 2010
      Reconnected: August 2012
      Began dating LD: November 2012
      Engaged! March 2014
      Closing the distance: December 2015

      Comment

        #4
        Yes! Some days I really do say... that's a day closer to... something. haha. Thank you for the reply!

        Met in July 2006
        Dated very briefly in November 2006
        Reconnected in July 2011
        Something changed in August 2013
        He visited in November 2013
        I traveled in November 2013
        I visit in February 2014

        Comment

          #5
          Originally posted by Heavenly_Love12 View Post
          All you can do is plan when you'll be able to see each other if something does not come up. I'm in the military so when I think about when I want to take leave, it's on a "if I'm able to" thought process. You can have a general idea of when you'll be able to see each other just know that if military duties come up, then it could get cancelled. I think all LDRs are like that though; any unforeseen circumstance could keep a visit from happening or cause one to occur earlier or later than expected.
          Thanks for the reply! I definitely see where you are coming from. I guess it is a bit frustrating for me being a civilian who could easily travel to him (based on the time I get off from work) but am unable to because since he is in the Navy there are times that he is unsure if he will be underway or not. I guess I just have to be patient for those times when he does know... thanks again!

          Met in July 2006
          Dated very briefly in November 2006
          Reconnected in July 2011
          Something changed in August 2013
          He visited in November 2013
          I traveled in November 2013
          I visit in February 2014

          Comment

            #6
            Hi there, my borfriend is currently taking steps to joining the Marines. Because he doesn't have an official ship out date to leave for basic, I'm wondering how he and I should comsider planning our next trip. I was going to fly to him one last time before he leaves. Since it is so up in the air at the moment and our next visit won't be until May, should I just wait until the time is much closer to buy my ticket?
            Because i would hate to spend money on a ticket that I couldn't get refunded if it means possibly losing the money I would use to fly to his boot camp graduation.

            Just something to consider I guess.

            Comment

              #7
              Could you maybe reserve tickets instead of buying them?
              I made love to him only twice, she thought and looked at the man laying asleep beside her. And yet still it is as if we have been together forever, as if he has always known my life, my soul, my body, my light, my pain
              - Paulo Coelho, "Eleven minutes"



              "Bız yüzyılın aşkı vardır" - We have dated since Sept. 2013. To see our full story, click here https://members.lovingfromadistance....and-our-visits

              Comment

                #8
                Originally posted by differentcountries View Post
                Could you maybe reserve tickets instead of buying them?
                I never really even considered that as an option haha. It's a wonderful idea, I wonder of there are any airlines that will do that....hmmm

                Comment

                  #9
                  I think you can at least get it done through travel agenscies. It is common for booking international flights when you have not yet got the visa.
                  I made love to him only twice, she thought and looked at the man laying asleep beside her. And yet still it is as if we have been together forever, as if he has always known my life, my soul, my body, my light, my pain
                  - Paulo Coelho, "Eleven minutes"



                  "Bız yüzyılın aşkı vardır" - We have dated since Sept. 2013. To see our full story, click here https://members.lovingfromadistance....and-our-visits

                  Comment

                    #10
                    Originally posted by differentcountries View Post
                    I think you can at least get it done through travel agenscies. It is common for booking international flights when you have not yet got the visa.
                    I did not know that! Thanks for the idea!

                    Met in July 2006
                    Dated very briefly in November 2006
                    Reconnected in July 2011
                    Something changed in August 2013
                    He visited in November 2013
                    I traveled in November 2013
                    I visit in February 2014

                    Comment

                      #11
                      You can also get insurance on the tickets! It doesn't cost a lot, I spent $50 on insurance when I last took leave and went home, and it ensures that if you have to change or cancel your flight, you don't pay any fees and can get a full refund! (minus the cost of the insurance) It's a good deal in my opinion.
                      Our love story:
                      Attended the same high school 2004-2007
                      Dated CD: June 2009-July 2010
                      Reconnected: August 2012
                      Began dating LD: November 2012
                      Engaged! March 2014
                      Closing the distance: December 2015

                      Comment

                        #12
                        Originally posted by Heavenly_Love12 View Post
                        You can also get insurance on the tickets! It doesn't cost a lot, I spent $50 on insurance when I last took leave and went home, and it ensures that if you have to change or cancel your flight, you don't pay any fees and can get a full refund! (minus the cost of the insurance) It's a good deal in my opinion.
                        I haven't wanted to do this but now that you put it that way it could really be worth it.

                        Met in July 2006
                        Dated very briefly in November 2006
                        Reconnected in July 2011
                        Something changed in August 2013
                        He visited in November 2013
                        I traveled in November 2013
                        I visit in February 2014

                        Comment

                          #13
                          my SO is planning on joining FFL this summer which means it will be almost impossible to plan or even barely know when we can meet

                          Comment

                            #14
                            I'm sorry I haven't responded to all of this wonderful advice.

                            I was unaware that a person purchase insurance for their tickets! That is a really clever thing. I'll have to look into what airlines offer that option...maybe they even have like a points per mile program or something ha

                            I hope everyone one has been doing well in their relatio ships, and I really hope each of you had valentines day that made you smile in some way

                            Comment

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