Anyone elope?

[NavyWife]

My fiance and I decided to elope instead of having a big wedding and spending tons of money. Id rather spend good money on a wedding/ honeymoon combo, it will be cheaper and set us up better to buy a house in the future. Has any other military bride/ husband eloped? Did you still have a photographer? How do I go about finding someone to marry us? We are going to the 1000 islands, so if anyone else went there, any suggestions? Ive obviously never done this before so any elopement advice is appreciated!

[lyonsgirl]

I didn't elope, but if you have a location picked out already, look online to see if you can find a JOP/priest/religious leader type person to perform the ceremony for you. Or - ask someone you know to get licensed and they can perform the ceremony for you.

I'd recommend getting a photographer - even if it's just a friend with a digital camera. I've heard too many stories from brides that didn't have one at all that regretted it. But - it is a personal decision.

Side note: and this is just because I can be obnoxious: don't say you're "just eloping". It's like saying you're "just having a civil ceremony". The fact of the matter is, you are getting married - which is SUPER exciting (congrats!). I dunno, I feel like saying you're "just" doing something makes it seem like you're not that excited about it.

[NavyWife]

Thanks for the input, I'm definitely having someone take pictures! And that's for the congrats, I am super excited! The "just" didn't mean anything. For a while I was torn between a wedding and eloping but I decided that eloping wad a better choice. Thanks again

[Heavenly_Love12]

Well first, congratulations on planning to get married! Like lyonsgirl, I don't think you should feel like you're "just eloping" and from the sound of it, it sounds like you're planning on having a courthouse type wedding. To me, eloping is getting married without anyone knowing but if you're planning it, then I assume at least your parents know. I could be wrong though.

I'm not married but being in the Air Force, I know that many will have a courthouse or small wedding because it's something you can do quickly versus planning for a ceremony and honeymoon when you don't know what or where you could be six months or more in the future.

I've had a few friends get married at the courthouse. None of them had professional photographers but did have pictures taken by friends. As far as having someone marry you, it will depend on where you're wanting to get married. If you go to the courthouse, a judge will marry you. One of my friends and her now husband were able to get married near the courthouse but in a little chapel! It was really cute and the judge asked before if they wanted a religious or civil ceremony so he could marry them accordingly. It shouldn't be too difficult to find someone to marry you if you know what you want to do.

I think you should make the most of this! You can totally have a big ceremony later, my friend who got married in the chapel had a big ceremony about a year and a half after. You can get a nice white dress and have a bouquet and go out to eat after the ceremony. To me, a marriage is about the commitment you're making to each other and not about the ceremony but you should make the most of it! Best of luck!

[NavyWife]

That is a good point because my parents do know. I guess I really don't know what to call it because I'm still getting a dress ( he's wearing his Dress Blues) and we are bringing another couple who are also dressing accordingly.
We are planning on going to the 1000 islands, the first night the boys are going to do their thing and s girls are going gto do something too (kind of like not seeing eachother the night before) then the next day we get married and then him and I are fin.a stay for about a week and our friends can stay how ever long they want. I have no idea what to call that lol but its what we want. And I agree, as long as he is my husband at the end of it all I don't care how it happens! I wasn't even goi.g to get a dress but he insists I still do that, and hey I won't argue lol It is a lot less stressful than planning a full blown wedding.

[piratemama]

I had a big wedding the first time, and that marriage ended in divorce. I'm older, more settled, and don't want the hassles that might accompany a wedding for my SO and me. We have talked about eloping, too. I have searched online for some ideas for the towns we are considering. I found a nice hotel on the beach of one of the possible towns, and they have a whole section of their website dedicated to wedding info for their area including arrangements the staff of the hotel can make. It might pay to google some info for the 1000 islands to see what you can find. Some hotels/resorts offer affordable packages that take care of all arrangements, including photographers. Good luck.

[ErinKristine]

My fiancé and I are having a civil ceremony before we have a formal wedding. He wants to the big formal wedding that we are doing in October, the purpose of our civil ceremony is mostly so we can close the distance which will make it easier for me to find a job where he is.

I'll echo what everyone else has said and definitely have someone take pictures, it' your wedding day and you'll want to remember it. As for finding someone to perform the ceremony, often the town clerk (or where ever you obtain the marriage license) has a list of JOPs in the area. Also there are some officiants who have a little business where they perform the wedding and have someone associated with them take the photos and then they send you a disc or flash drive with all the photos. You might even be able to find some JOPs by looking at wedding websites like the knot, that way you know if you are getting someone that is recommended.

[lucybelle]

We were planning to elope, but in the end had a very small ceremony- 13 people (including us). I had my friend get ordained online and married us. You should also look into if you need witnesses. Some states you need two witnesses. I got married in CO and we didn't need any.

I'm one of the "brides" that regretted not having a photographer, a professional one. Even with all the digital camera pictures, we only got a few nice ones. I'm having a wedding party this Saturday almost specifically so we can hire a professional photographer to take some nice pictures. I wish someone had told me "GET THE PHOTOGRAPHER!" so I'm telling you!

[RedWhirlwind]

I want to elope, but he wants to have our families there. We're planning a trip & hoping to gather at least our immediate families (minus my dad who lives out of the country for work & can't get back easily) to meet each other this summer. Since we're talking about trying to get married before he deploys this fall, I'm thinking that I may push for us to surprise them and just go to the courthouse then since those are the family members most important to each of us (we both have complicated relationships with our extended families). That would be a compromise!

Since my mom's boyfriend is a really good amateur photog, and he'd be there with my mom, I'd probably ask him to take pics for us.

I'm with some of the others who suggested looking up JOP's at your destination. And if you have anyone going with you guys who would be willing to get licensed, that's a GREAT option too!

[blueorchid1]

First of all congrats
I am not currently engaged, planning a wedding, or close to anyone who will soon be getting married...but I do think that it's a good call to hire a professional photographer if you don't have any close friends or family members who are quite skilled with a camera.
For me I love having loads of pictures (even bad or blurry ones) to look at to remind me of events and such. The way I see it is that if you hire someone and they take too many picutres or even just a few really spectacular images, at least you will always have those to look back on and hold whilst your soon to be husband is away