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Light in The Darkness

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    Light in The Darkness

    Hello everyone. So, I'm gonna give a small amount of back story to my relationship before we dive into the icky stuff.

    We met the beginning of April this year (2014) through Xbox. He's a marine and he's currently out in California while I'm here in Ohio. We decided to become exclusive on Easter, (4/20/14). By the beginning of July we started bickering a lot and we were both pretty confused about whether or not we wanted to continue this relationship. A mutual friend (also a marine) suggested that we were bickering so much due to the frustration of not actually being there. So on the 23rd of July, he bought me plane tickets to go to San Diego. 2500 miles away from home. I was out there the 25-29 of July. I'm gonna save all the amazing and private details (to spare you guys mostly since I'm actually pretty open and for some reason love talking about it), but it's safe to say we both had the most amazing weekend of our lives.

    Side note- It is very hard to say goodbye at the airport. UGH.

    Anyways.

    I leave Monday night, get back home Tuesday morning. Well... That next Monday I had found out that he had been texting another girl. He lied about our relationship and after having intimate times on Skype with me, would stay up texting her until 1am. It never got passed the fun flirting BUT..I was still hurt nonetheless. I mean, really? Not even a week after I leave he's gonna talk to another girl.

    I chewed him a new one like I've never chewed someone out before.
    I love him. So much that I'd rather go through this with him than not have him at all.
    But right now I don't trust him, I'm suspicious, I'm hurt. Sometimes I'll be fine and the next day I'm a mess about it again.

    He's doing a great job at reassuring me and really stepping up in our relationship.
    But right now I don't feel like it's enough.

    I don't know what I can do, if there is anything I can do. Blah.

    We have another trip planned beginning of September. I'm excited, but I can't get these thoughts of other women out of my head. I've never been someone to creep/stalk on my SO's stuff and I'm still not, I'm just...I dunno.

    NEED HELP. D:
    Or just someone I can vent to forever. Probably someone either blind or deaf. ;P

    #2
    I've been in this situation. Until you can forgive 100%, you wont get past it. I never understood what people meant about forgiving 100% until I was ready to do it. Prior to forgiving I said I wanted him to answer all of my questions honestly. And I would never ask again, He did, I did. I forgave 100% and NEVER went back to agonizing over it again. I was only hurting myself. In the end,I knew I didn't want to feel bad any more and he was making the effort, so I could as well. Good luck.
    Last edited by TaraMarie; August 13, 2014, 07:35 AM.
    sigpic

    I love him. Forever. And every day after that.

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      #3
      Lol I'm always up for a good vent.
      Yes, like TM said, you won't be able to let it behind you unless you have 100% forgiven the situation, otherwise it'll stay suck in your mind.
      "We are beings attracted to the essence of hope, and life is the all encompassing hope that everything can change; that everything can be better."

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        #4
        But I don't know how, if that makes sense.
        Maybe I'm just slower at healing but ugh.

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